Leap of Faith
by Lunaludus Scribex
Summary: Shadow is discovered alive shortly after the events of Final Fantasy VI. Rated M for profanity, violence, and nonexplicit sexual content. -IN PROGRESS-
1. Chapter I

**PRELIMINARIES:** None of this belongs to me. Final Fantasy VI, and all worlds, characters, etc. associated with it are the property of Square. Square is not affiliated in any way, shape, or form with the creation of this story (a fact for which, I suspect, they would be profoundly grateful). I have made liberal usage of their characters and settings in this story; this was done without their knowledge or permission, and is technically an infringement of Square's copyright. As this story is, at the most pragmatic level, free promotion of the Final Fantasy franchise, it is hoped that they will regard this story (if at all) with a benign ignorance. 

If you paid a wooden nickel for this story, not only have you been drastically overcharged, but whoever charged you has done so illegally, and I disavow any association with said individual(s). 

This story is archived in .txt and .htm format at my website, The Codex Scribanus (see author profile). In the highly unlikely event that you wish to have a copy of this story for your own site's archives, you'll find distribution guidelines there. 

All feedback is welcome, up to and including line-by-line critiques (provided they fit in my mailbox). 

Now, sit back and either enjoy the ride, or (more likely) enjoy thinking of what you'll do to me at the end of it...

* * *

_I'm not going to run... _

People like me... 

Never forget... 

Be well... 

Baram... 

**"NO!"**

With a loud cry, I shot upright in a wordless scream. My head was consumed by a great roaring, while a chocobo the size of the moon danced in my gut. I felt, but did not see, the arms across my chest, forcing me down...down... 

And then, there was silence. 

The roaring died, and the chocobo slept; free of their tyranny, I passed to lesser masters--the ringing in my teeth, the ragged pain in my throat, the bruises that covered every inch of my body, and the bright light beating down on my clenched eyelids. 

I dealt with this last dictator first. With a conscious effort, I relaxed my eyelids. The pain intensified. I wanted it to go away. 

I opened my eyes. 

At first, I thought the bright flash had blinded me. I squinted and blinked and shied away; but I refused to shut my eyes again, and in time, I was rewarded. The light dwindled until it became a lantern swinging back and forth over the bed on which I lay, suspended by a chain from a ceiling of wooden boards and rotting plaster. I looked up behind me, and saw a round window a few feet above my head. 

With an effort, I forced myself up onto my elbows and raised my head. In the distance, I could make out two figures sitting at a table. I considered whether to call out to them; then, the chocobo awoke and made the decision for me. 

I fell back onto the bed with a loud groan, clutching my stomach. 

"He's awake!" 

I felt, rather than heard, the pounding of the footsteps along the floor towards my bed. I opened my eyes in time to see a bright blur become a dark blur. A cool hand went to my forehead as the blur swirled and coalesced into two faces. 

The face on the right was a man's face, lean and narrow, with a sharp chin and brown eyes. A shock of pale brown hair drooped over the dark band that crossed his brow. It was this face that spoke first. 

"Shadow, are you all right?" 

"Who? Wha--" 

"Just take it easy." This from the second face, as the hand (which I surmised to be hers) rose from my brow. "From the look of things, you've have a rough few days." Whereas the first face was sharp in a rough, wiry sense, the second possessed a sharp delicacy, bordering on the exotic. A few strands of pale green hair drooped limply on one side, but what I really noticed were the eyes--a deep green, much darker than her hair; slanted slightly, and shot through with flecks of gold that glinted metallically in the lamplight. "How are you feeling?" 

"Feeling? I--" The chocobo made itself known. "I've been better. I think." 

"You're lucky to be alive," the man said. "Celes told me that if another day or two had gone by, you'd be dead." 

"Locke!" The woman elbowed him sharply, eliciting a grunt. "The last thing he needs right now are specters of what might have been." She turned back to me. "What's important is that you're safe, and you'll get better." 

"I guess I owe you, then." 

She laughed. "Owe me! After all the times we've saved each other's lives, I hope you'd do the same for any of us. What are friends for?" 

_Friends..._

I looked from the one to the other. "Would you mind if I asked you something?" 

"Not at all, Shadow. What would you like to know?" 

"Do I know you?" 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

**_LEAP OF FAITH_**

A Final Fantasy VI Fanfic 

by 

Lunaludus Scribex 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

**CHAPTER I**

The one they called Celes cut a..._prominent_ figure. She was of middling height, with a slightly rounded face, flashing blue eyes, and hair that went down to her waist. Her posture, her voice, and her every gesture exuded assertion to the point of being overbearing--something which, I was learning, did not make for good bedside manners. 

"It'll come back eventually?" I stared at her in disbelief. "That's it?" 

She gave me an exasperated look that I was already far too familiar with. "Yes, that's it." 

Locke, as the man was called, tried to intercede on my behalf. "Celes, can't you give him something a little more concrete, or--" 

"Locke, I'm a soldier." Locke grimaced, glanced at me, and rolled his eyes to the ceiling. "I've seen this a thousand times. A man gets hit on the head or goes into shock from a fight, and when he comes to, he can't remember who he is or where he's from. It'll come back with time. I can't say how long, but it'll come back." 

I shifted on my elbows, gritting my teeth and doing my best to ignore the chocobo's pronounced displeasure. "What should I do in the meantime?" 

"Stay in bed. Get plenty of rest, and let your body heal. I don't know what you were doing in the week since we last saw you--" 

"That makes two of us," I muttered under my breath. 

"--but you banged yourself up pretty good doing it. Setzer's going to touch down in Albrook in a few minutes. We'll get you a room at an inn and see about getting you a doctor." 

_Setzer? Albrook?_ "Touch down?" 

I saw them start and exchange a glance before Locke answered. "You're inside the world's only airship, my friend. A good thing, too--I don't know how you would have taken a three day hike." 

"So that's what that buzzing noise is." I grimaced as the chocobo did a cartwheel. "The sooner we're down, the better. Maybe being on the ground will settle my stomach." 

That earned me another startled glance. "What?" 

"Nothing, really. It's just that..." Locke shook his head. "Nothing."

* * *

Well, it _did_ settle my stomach. 

I wish I could say that Albrook was at all familiar to me. It might have simply been that I'd never seen the city from stretcher-back before. More likely, it was that I was preoccupied with my own pain as Locke and Celes carried me through the city. I felt every step they took--every uneven step, every turned ankle, every stumble, every texture of the cobblestone street engraved itself on my bones. It was all I could do to think of breathing, and when they set me down and I saw the stairs, I knew I was going to die. 

I don't know if passing out from sheer pain counts as dying or not. I wasn't splitting hairs about the difference--I got to go through the same thing coming back to life if I did, which was not something I'd pay gold to go through again. When I next regained my sense of the outside world, it was to an old man's wheeze. 

"He'll be all right. There's no internal bleeding and he doesn't have any broken bones--though with bruises like those, that's nothing short of a miracle." 

A chuckle. "He's rather resilient." _Locke's voice._

"I can see that. But even so--I would never have believed someone looking like _that_ could even be alive, let alone well on the way to recovery. This is a very lucky man." 

"...Is he?" 

I didn't open my eyes, and neither of them spoke again. 

The pain slowly subsided. Bone weariness replaced it, and I drifted off into a dark, dreamless void that I somehow knew. I couldn't say how long it kept its hold on me; when I finally emerged, it was to the moonlight streaming through an open window directly across from me. I slowly, gingerly sat up and peered into the darkness of my room at the inn. 

I heard a soft snore to my right, and snapped around; but it took a moment before my eyes adjusted to the darkness and I saw the figure asleep in a chair next to my bed, head bowed. The sleeper had long hair, and was swathed in a blanket; I couldn't tell who it was, and after a moment, I gave up the effort. 

I laid back and closed my eyes, but I was not tired; after only a moment or two I gave up the effort and sat up again. A warm breeze ran through the room, brushing against my face and through my hair, and I had a sudden urge to see what was outside that window. 

Slowly, so as not to awaken whoever was asleep beside me, I pushed back the bedsheets. In the moonlight, I could see that all I wore was a loin cloth, and while I suspected that should have bothered me, at the moment I was hot and sticky and grateful I wasn't wearing anything more. I swung my legs over the side and eased my feet to the floor, coming down in an easy crouch on the balls of my feet. 

I carefully straightened, though I continued to lean on the bed, and slowly tip-toed forward, placing each foot gingerly in front of the next and testing for creaks in the floorboards. My confidence grew with each step; after about ten, I came to the end of the bed. I straightened completely, and took my next step. 

It was almost my last, as my legs gave out from under me. In desperation, I fell back on the bed with a _thump_ that was all too loud to my ears. The sleeper groaned. I froze. 

"..._mumble mumble_ Terra _mumble mumble_..." 

It seemed an eternity before the sleeper was finally still again, and another before I could convince myself that he was in fact asleep and shift back, lowering my feet to the floor. When they finally touched, I straightened much more slowly this time, and put one foot forward. I felt my legs scream in protest; but it was not the sudden collapse I had experienced before, and I forced myself to ignore it. 

Step after step, I focused all my energies on staying upright, ignoring my progress for fear of being overwhelmed by the magnitude of my task. Eternity after eternity after eternity...and then, I was there, staggering up and throwing my arms on the window sill to look at the world outside. 

And I saw Eternity. 

All of Albrook spread out before me. I saw cluster after cluster of buildings, glowing with lamps in their windows and laughter in the distance, far into the night; beyond them, endless water glittered before my eyes. I looked up and beheld the jewel-encrusted cloak of the sky stretching out before me. It screamed of the unlimited, of the unexplored, and I soared along with it. My energy was limitless; my boundaries fell away. I was no longer a mere admirer of the grandeur before me--I _was_ the grandeur. 

The room suddenly felt unbearably confining. I turned to wake the sleeper--and I saw the mirror. 

It was a full-length mirror, propped up in the corner; next to it stood a small table, on which rested a large brush and a number of bottles and implements whose purpose I could not begin to fathom. The man in the mirror stared back at me, hunched feebly over the window sill. I couldn't help myself; I shuffled over for a closer look. 

The man I saw was tall, lithe, well-muscled, and black and blue all over. His body was riddled with scars, some littler than others; all were dwarfed by the ancient slash that extended across his chest from hip to shoulder. I leaned in closer for a look at his face, covered by what looked to be a couple of weeks' worth of fuzz. It was not pretty; sharp, but with far too square a jaw for its narrowness, topped by a small shock of sickly pale hair and marred by a fading black eye and an unnaturally angled nose. His eyes were black slits, haunted and piercing and unforgiving. I broke out in a cold sweat as I lost myself in them; they felt detached from me, as if they were not my eyes, but someone else's. 

They might as well have been. The man in the mirror was a complete stranger. 

I regarded that stranger for a moment longer, then turned back to my bed. 

I was tired after all. 

_MAIOREM HAC DILECTIONEM NEMO HABET   
UT ANIMAM SUAM QUIS PONAT PRO AMICIS SUIS_


	2. Chapter II

**PRELIMINARIES:** None of this belongs to me. Final Fantasy VI, and all worlds, characters, etc. associated with it are the property of Square. Square is not affiliated in any way, shape, or form with the creation of this story (a fact for which, I suspect, they would be profoundly grateful). I have made liberal usage of their characters and settings in this story; this was done without their knowledge or permission, and is technically an infringement of Square's copyright. As this story is, at the most pragmatic level, free promotion of the Final Fantasy franchise, it is hoped that they will regard this story (if at all) with a benign ignorance. 

If you paid a wooden nickel for this story, not only have you been drastically overcharged, but whoever charged you has done so illegally, and I disavow any association with said individual(s). 

This story is archived in .txt and .htm format at my website, The Codex Scribanus (see author profile). In the highly unlikely event that you wish to have a copy of this story for your own site's archives, you'll find distribution guidelines there. 

All feedback is welcome, up to and including line-by-line critiques (provided they fit in my mailbox). 

Now, sit back and either enjoy the ride, or (more likely) enjoy thinking of what you'll do to me at the end of it...

* * *

_The world's greatest... _

Find me here... 

All I know... 

Come back... 

Stop... 

**"Wake up, you fool!"**

I cannot adequately describe the sensation of being yanked from a formless, shapeless nightmare to face one made flesh. Especially _this_ one made flesh. 

The leering specter roughly shaking me by the shoulders was, in the murky gray of early morning, a ghost right out of the darkest pit of hell: a stark black-and-white figure with hair even paler than his skin--if that was possible--flaring uncontrollably behind him and beady black eyes sunk deep into his emaciated sockets. His face was adorned with a hideous swirl of black claws that bled down from his left eye and swung up across his forehead. 

I gasped and shuffled back on my elbows. He drew closer, grinning sadistically as his victim's escape routes were closed off. 

I rubbed my eyes, blinked, shook my head rapidly to clear the cobwebs, and looked back up. The demon remained. 

I screamed. 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

**_LEAP OF FAITH_**

A Final Fantasy VI Fanfic 

by 

Lunaludus Scribex 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

**CHAPTER II**

The demon blinked, taken aback by my sudden outburst. I scrambled back on my heels, only to feel the wall bump behind me. _Trapped!_ I tried to get my feet under me, and cast about in a desperate search for some kind of weapon--in vain on both counts. There was nothing I could do but watch as he loomed over me, then threw back his head and burst out laughing. 

_Laughing?_

"Oh...oh goddesses...that...that was worth the wait!" 

_A man's voice!_

The sun chose that moment to break through the cloud cover that had hidden it from view, revealing that my "demon" was, in fact, a man. An ugly, unkempt man, but a man nonetheless. What I had mistaken for claws were in fact deep scars, accented far beyond reason by the overapplication of some kind of black--_Makeup?_ A flash of inspiration hit me, and I glanced over at the table by the mirror. It was now vacant. _Perhaps not so unkempt, after all._

My uninvited visitor coughed into his fist and stifled his laughter, then tried to glare at me. His constantly twitching lip ruined the effect. "You deserved that, after that 'introduction' you pulled on the _Blackjack--_" 

"Who the hell are you?" 

That took him aback. "You mean you really don't remember--" For a moment, I thought he was going to burst into tears; then, a sinister grin slid onto his face. "Well, now. I guess that means that I get a second chance at the formalities, as well, doesn't it? _I,_" he said, drawing himself up, "am Setzer Gabbiani, world-famous gambler and traveler. And _you_"--there was no mistaking the contempt in his voice--"are the legendary Shadow." _Legendary?!_ "Cowering under his bedsheets, and three to one says you just wet yourself." 

I felt my face flush. "You lose," I said coldly, while I gathered my feet under me, braced for the jump, measured the distance to his throat--_What the hell?!_

I blinked, and glared at Setzer. "Did you have a reason for waking me up this early in the morning, or did you just want to see if you could give me a heart attack?" 

Setzer flung one hand back across his forehead, and heaved a loud sigh. "Alas, pleasant as the thought may be, I'm afraid I'm here on a specific errand." 

"Spit it out." I wouldn't have thought it possible to so detest a man within two minutes of meeting him. 

"Quite simple, really. The others seem to have this crazy idea that as long as I agreed to let them borrow my airship, they should go gallivanting around the world to see if they can't find something that will help whatever's screwed up in that head of yours--not that you're worth the effort, if you ask me, but they are my friends. I thought you might want to say goodbye before they leave." 

"They?" 

"Terra, Celes, Locke--you know, them." 

"Oh." Memories of the previous night's unspectacular attempt to walk flooded back as Setzer turned to leave. "You're all going?" 

Setzer stopped in the doorway and stared at me, slackjawed. "What? You thought someone was going to stay here? Sit around all day and wipe your ass for you?" His lip curled in disgust. "You would, wouldn't you. Well, I don't know that it should matter all that much to you--it never did before--but we all have lives, dark man. They're _not_ in Albrook, and they _don't_ involve you." He turned, paused, then glanced back over his shoulder. "We're all downstairs in the dining room, eating breakfast. Takeoff's in one hour, goodbyes or no goodbyes, so get moving." 

I sighed, then pushed back the covers and swung my legs over the side--and remembered something else. "Wait! Where are my--" 

_**Slam!**_

"--clothes?"

* * *

"Looking for something?" 

Blankets, I reflected as I spun through the air, must have _some_ advantages over actual clothing. Unfortunately, what exactly those advantages were eluded me at the moment. Kind of like my footing. 

I looked up from the floor to see the green-haired woman--_What was her name? Oh yeah, Terra_--standing in the way of a door I hadn't heard open, regarding me with crossed arms and a raised eyebrow. 

I clambered unsteadily to my feet, holding the blanket around me with one hand and leaning on the empty dresser behind me with the other. I considered my options, and decided to give her a half-answer. "Some pants, for starters." 

That raised the other eyebrow. "And what do you need pants for?" 

"Right this moment, or just in general?" 

She laughed. "Let's start with right this moment." Her grin faded, and her eyes narrowed. "Because I could have sworn Celes told you to stay in bed." 

I had been on my feet for almost fifteen minutes, and I could definitely see the wisdom of that order. The prospect of abandonment, however, had compelled me to do some hard thinking, and I'd concluded that, while a nice luxury, it was an order I could afford to disregard, and quite possibly couldn't afford to follow. With clothing and a little luck, I decided, I should be able to survive on my own. 

_I always have before._

_What the--_ I shook my head briefly and looked up at Terra, who was still awaiting an explanation. "Right this moment, I need them so I can go downstairs to the dining room." 

"If you're hungry, I can get you some soup." 

"Thanks, but I meant to say goodbye before everyone left." 

"What are you talking about? We're not leaving until tonight." 

"Tonight? But Setzer said--" I broke off, coloring with disgust. 

"I know what Setzer said--that's why I'm up here. He just came downstairs and tried to push his flight plan over us." Terra's eyes glittered in the sunlight. "Celes grounded him." 

"Ouch." 

"I'll give him your sympathies." She smiled. "So now that you know you'll be stuck with us for another day, why don't you come back to bed?" 

"An excellent idea." My legs were killing me. 

Terra took a step forward. "Need a hand?" 

"That's all right, I can--" Fall flat on my face, that's what I could do. Terra was there almost immediately, kneeling by my side and helping me push up to my knees. 

"Are you all right?" 

"I'll live." I tried to come to my feet, only to make a frightening discovery. "I can't move my legs!" 

"You must be exhausted. Here, I'll carry you." Terra threw my arm over her shoulder, grunted, and came to her feet, lifting me up in the process. 

I tried to shift my weight, ease the dead weight for her somewhat. She didn't appreciate my efforts. "Stop struggling!" Another grunt, as she dragged me toward the bed while I held the blanket around me with my free hand. "For someone who--ugh--nearly starved to death--urk--you sure weigh a lot!" With a final effort, she dumped me on the bed, then dropped into the chair next to it, breathing heavily while I pulled the covers up over me. 

At that moment, Celes' head popped in the door. "Terra, I heard a thump, are you--" She noticed me for the first time. "You're awake! How do you feel?" 

"Tired," I managed. 

"He's had a busy morning," Terra supplied as Celes stepped into the room. "Celes, could I talk to you?" 

I rolled over on my side, closed my eyes, and listened to the low murmur of Terra and Celes' conversation. I heard Terra mention Setzer's name just before the door shut with a loud _click._

* * *

_Remember me in the shadows of the flame..._

This waking up in strange situations was going to have to stop. This time, at least, I had a decent sleep, dreamless and peaceful and ended not by a front-runner for the title of World's Least Appealing "Man" but by music--specifically, the sound of someone whistling nearby. I laid still for a moment--not that I really had a choice; my arms were bound at my sides by what I realized after a moment was a tightly-tucked blanket--and concentrated on the tune. There was something familiar about it... 

_The small lights in my..._

I grit my teeth in frustration. The snatches of words ran parallel to the whistler's melody, coming tantalizingly close to fulfillment before dying stillborn. 

_Promise me that you will--will--_**Damn it!**

The words were right on the tip of my tongue, and I _still_ couldn't remember! 

This was getting me nowhere. I slowly opened my eyes, blinking rapidly to adjust to the rich orange glow that suffused the room, and raised my head. My whistler sat back on a stool against the dresser, examining a long, wicked-looking knife with a silvery-green blade as he held it up to the sunlight. 

"Locke?" 

The audible _thud_ of his right foot hitting the floor was followed seconds later by a dull _thunk_ as the knife sunk to the hilt in the floorboards. "Shadow! I thought you were asleep!" 

"...I was." 

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to--" 

"No, it's all right." I waved him back as he stood. "I was wondering, though--what was that you were whistling?" 

"Whistling?" Locke blinked. "I didn't realize I was. Bad habit, that..." His brow furrowed in thought. "Now what was I whistling? Hmm...no, that's not it...hey--no..." He looked up at me in bewilderment. "That's odd. I can't remember what it is!" 

"Oh." 

"Why do you ask? Do you recognize it, or--" 

"I thought I did." I sat upright, and leaned back against the wall. "But I can't really even remember how the tune went, now." Locke shrugged and retrieved the knife, being careful not to touch the blade as he drew it out. "Sharp?" 

"And poison-coated. And speaking of recognition..." He strode casually toward my bed, holding the knife before him at arm's length. "Does this look familiar?" 

"Should it?" 

"It was yours--you risked your life to get it, anyway. It's called the Striker." 

"Striker." I tasted the word, felt the sickly-sweet promise that almost drowned out the bitter undertaste as I took an experimental slice through the air with its bearer. The knife was easy to handle, but I didn't feel anything special about it. "I risked my life for this? Why?" 

"You never said, and no one asked. Actually, I don't think anyone really thought twice about it." Locke's face darkened. "We all risked our lives for things that really didn't matter back then." 

"Oh." I handed the Striker back; he took it without hesitation. 

"It's a good thing you had it, though. We wouldn't have recognized you if you hadn't had this." 

"What do you mean? Didn't you know my face?" 

"Well...no." Locke shifted uneasily. "You always kept to yourself--we never even saw you when you weren't wearing your mask." 

_Mask?_ I wanted to ask about that, but the look on Locke's face told me he wouldn't be very forthcoming, so I changed the subject. "So, when do you leave? After dinner?" 

"Tomorrow morning. The _Falcon_ blew a gasket around noon, and Setzer's turned Albrook inside out looking for a replacement part." He grinned. "You should have seen his face when Celes made the arrangements for another night at the inn. He really hates this city, for some reason." 

Thoughts of Setzer brought his grim tidings and my current predicament back to the forefront of my mind. _I should find out how much they'll do before they leave, and how much I'll be on my own for._ "What were you doing that delayed Setzer's morning launch?" 

"Just taking care of the details," Locke replied. "Restocking the _Falcon,_ getting Terra a room at the inn, paying the doctor--you know." 

"Yeah, I--" _Wait a sec._ "Terra's staying here?" 

Locke suddenly looked very uncomfortable. "Uh, yeah. She and Celes--they--well, at lunch--they had it out, really. Celes thought that she was going to stay behind, but Terra made a...pretty convincing case." 

Stay behind? 

_We all have lives. They're not in Albrook..._

"Doesn't she have somewhere else to go?" 

"Sort of, up in Mobliz. But they've gotten along without her for some time now. They'll be all right by themselves awhile longer." He gave me a weak laugh. "That's more than I can say for you--walking and demanding pants a day removed from the brink of death? You may have lost your memory, Shadow, but you certainly haven't changed." 

_...and they don't involve you._

"But why? Why stay behind with me at all?" 

The uncertainty gave way to outright anger. "Because you're one of us," he snapped perhaps a hair too quickly. He opened his mouth, hesitated, then went on. "You weren't as forthcoming as some of us, but for well over a God damn _year_ you fought with us, you bled with us--you took down a _god_ with us! When you vanished, we were ready to go back and search for you until the tower collapsed. No one even dreamed you survived that, and Terra really took that hard. She's seen too much death already, and she--" He stopped abruptly, his eyes widening. "What--what I mean to say is that we're your friends, and we don't abandon our friends when they're in trouble." He was actually breathing heavily by the time he finished speaking. 

"Wait a minute." I looked at him in confusion, trying to pick from a dozen questions swirling in my head. "You thought I was dead? Why did you come back for me, then?" 

"I--well, we didn't. We--well, we--" Locke suddenly moved for the door. "It's almost dinner time. I'll get you some soup." 

He didn't exactly run out of the room, but the door shut behind him before I could say a word. 

_MAIOREM HAC DILECTIONEM NEMO HABET   
UT ANIMAM SUAM QUIS PONAT PRO AMICIS SUIS_


	3. Chapter III

**PRELIMINARIES:** None of this belongs to me. Final Fantasy VI, and all worlds, characters, etc. associated with it are the property of Square. Square is not affiliated in any way, shape, or form with the creation of this story (a fact for which, I suspect, they would be profoundly grateful). I have made liberal usage of their characters and settings in this story; this was done without their knowledge or permission, and is technically an infringement of Square's copyright. As this story is, at the most pragmatic level, free promotion of the Final Fantasy franchise, it is hoped that they will regard this story (if at all) with a benign ignorance. 

If you paid a wooden nickel for this story, not only have you been drastically overcharged, but whoever charged you has done so illegally, and I disavow any association with said individual(s). 

This story is archived in .txt and .htm format at my website, The Codex Scribanus (see author profile). In the highly unlikely event that you wish to have a copy of this story for your own site's archives, you'll find distribution guidelines there. 

All feedback is welcome, up to and including line-by-line critiques (provided they fit in my mailbox). 

Now, sit back and either enjoy the ride, or (more likely) enjoy thinking of what you'll do to me at the end of it...

* * *

_This isn't happening... _

Bloody hazel... 

Those eyes... 

Not again... 

No right... 

**"I'm sorry."**

"Ugh?" As my eyes flicked open, I felt a soft breeze off to my right, as if something had pulled back suddenly from very close by. I struggled upright from the tangled morass of my covers and strained my ears, but heard only my own breathing. 

"Hello?" I peered into the darkness. "Is someone there?" 

Silence. 

_I'm sorry._ I mouthed the words as I struggled to recall the voice. It was a whisper--_no, more of a mumble_--almost too soft to discern, but undeniably female--_What are you talking about? It was obviously male!_ I grit my teeth. This wasn't a long-lost memory, damn it! I heard it with my own ears! 

_Or did you just imagine it?_

I slumped against the wall, cradled my head in my hands and groaned. Not only was it the middle of the night. Not only was there a sudden, uncomfortable chill in the air. Not only was I arguing with myself. And losing. If that weren't enough, I could now feel an impending headache just this side of debilitating, and I still didn't know whether anyone was in the room. 

My eyes had finally adjusted to the darkness, but were of little help. The dresser, the mirror, the table, the stool all stood untouched--I could almost see the dust gathering in the sparse moonlight. To my right, the chair sat next to the bed as always; beyond it, the door was closed. 

Everything was just as it had been when Celes shut the door last night. No one was here. 

But still... 

_I'm sorry._

I reached out and laid a hand on the hard wooden seat. 

It was warm. 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

**_LEAP OF FAITH_**

A Final Fantasy VI Fanfic 

by 

Lunaludus Scribex 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

**CHAPTER III**

"I'm really sorry about that." 

"You should be." I glared at my self-appointed caretaker over a spoonful of vegetable soup, my lunch--and breakfast, and dinner, and dessert. At least it was hot. It had been cold this morning, when Terra had conceived the brilliant idea of my eating with them for the last meal before takeoff. _Breakfast in bed,_ she had described it while I wondered if anyone had a right to be so alert or cheerful before dawn, _with good friends and pleasant conversation._

She got the first part right, anyway. 

"Was it that bad? I mean, I know it got out of hand near the end, but--" 

"Near the _end?_" I stared at her in unmasked shock. "Terra, the morning began with Celes and Setzer screaming at each other. It ended with Celes and Setzer screaming at each other. I don't think they stopped once." 

"Come--" 

"Nine arguments, Terra." Of course, I didn't _really_ keep track--I doubt anyone could have; they kept blending one into another, into another, back into the first. I came up with nine by counting the number of times Setzer's voice went so high it cracked, which I suppose was as good a measure as any. "And Locke didn't even raise an eyebrow until number seven, which tells me this wasn't unexpected." 

Terra raised her hands. "Okay, okay, I'm sorry. I thought you'd enjoy some pleasant conversation, that's all." 

"Terra, you and I are going to have to talk about your definition of 'pleasant.' " 

She grinned. "Touche." There was nearly a full minute of silent eating before Terra spoke up again. "I still tell you, they're nice to be around, most of the time. They're usually not as bad as they were today." 

A common opinion, I guess. After breakfast, Locke came back, alone, to apologize for Celes' behavior. "Uncharitable" was the kindest word he used. 

Then, a little later, Celes stopped by to apologize, which I think startled her almost as much as me. Of course, she was apologizing for _Setzer,_ but it's the thought that counts. 

Then, just before takeoff, Setzer graced me with his presence to apologize, as near as I could tell, for my own existence. I'm still not sure who he was apologizing to. 

"Shadow?" 

"Hmm?" I started, glanced up over an empty spoon hanging from a hand--oh, my hand--in midair. "I'm sorry. What was that?" 

"I asked if you were all right. You've just been sitting and staring at that spoon for the past five minutes. Are you okay?" 

My soup was now cold, and I didn't feel that hungry. "Just thinking, that's all." 

"It must be pretty important, if you can lose yourself like that. Anything I can help with?" 

There was something that had been bugging me, actually. "Maybe you can tell me why everyone's so skittish when they talk about my past." 

"You have that effect on people, you know." 

_Yeah. Those eyes._ "Maybe, but this feels like more than that. Like they want to say something, but they're afraid to." There was a loud clatter as Terra's fork slipped out of her hand. "Terra?" 

Her cheeks shaded rose. "I'm sorry. I had asked them not to really bring up your past with you, but I was thinking more along the lines of not trying to speed up your recovery. I didn't think they'd take it _that_ far." 

"What's so bad about recovering faster?" 

"Nothing, if you're ready. I just didn't want you to feel any pressure, feel like people are force-feeding you your past, that you _have_ to remember. If you try to push it...bad things can happen." 

"You speak as if you're had some experience with that." 

"Why do you think they let me stay behind with you?" 

"Let you--huh?" Locke said that Terra had made a convincing case..."You mean that you've taken care of someone with amnesia?" 

"Close." She smiled and tapped her head. 

"You're kidding." 

"Not at all. In fact, I'd just woken up--like you did--when I first met you, Locke, and the others." 

"And bad things happened." 

I witnessed every crease of the painstakingly swift metamorphosis from joy to shadow. "Yes," she whispered. "Bad things." 

"Terra?" 

She looked up and smiled wanly. "Sorry. It wasn't a very pleasant time for me. My friends and I were at the center of a crisis, and I had no choice but to push...but there's no rush with you. So I'm hoping you'll turn out better...better than I did." 

"In other words, just go at my own pace?" 

"More or less. I knew you fairly well, so if you have any questions, or want to...find something out, ask me." 

"But?" 

She sighed. "But, there are a few things you're going to have to remember on your own. I won't talk about them." 

"Because of those 'bad things' you mentioned earlier." 

"Exactly. If you're not ready to handle them, things could get out of hand." Terra stood, and picked up her plate. "Are you done? If so, I'll take that back down to the kitchen." 

"Be my guest." 

A little bit of soup sloshed over the side of the bowl when she set it on her plate and turned away. "I have to do some shopping, but I'll be back in a few hours. Try to get some rest in the meantime." 

I pitched my voice flat. "Yes, mother." 

She stumbled through the doorway with a loud _crash._

* * *

"Clothes?" 

Terra nodded. "I only had what I'm wearing, and your suit had to be destroyed--there was practically nothing left of it." She pulled a pair of pants and a shirt from a box, and draped them over the end of the bed. "Try these on. I had to guess at the size," she added apologetically. 

"Are you sure it's such a good idea to be on my feet? I mean--" 

"It'll be all of five minutes. I know you're up to that." 

"All right." I reached for the covers, hesitated, then looked back at Terra. "Ahem?" 

"Oh! Sorry." She turned her back, and I hobbled over to the clothes. It only took a moment to get them on. 

Perfect fit. 

"You," I said as I turned for Terra's inspection in the orange sunlight, "are one hell of a guesser." 

"I've had practice," she replied. "I spent almost a year as the _de facto_ mayor of the world's youngest town, so I had to learn." 

"The orphanage in Mobliz?" 

She grinned wryly. "The orphanage _is_ Mobliz. There's nothing else left." 

"What happened to it?" 

Her face fell. "It was destroyed. I guess you could call it an earthquake." 

"But you don't." It wasn't a question. 

"No, I know what destroyed it--and who." 

"_Who?_" I sat down heavily on the bed. "You mean to tell me someone has the power to cause earthquakes?! That's not pos--" 

_You took down a god with us._

"Is--_was_ it anyone I knew?" 

Terra blinked at the change of tense. "Not well--I don't think. You fought him alone at least once, I know. His name was Kefka." 

"Kefka." The Striker meant nothing to me now; but that name sent a chill down my spine. "Can you tell me about him?" 

"He's dead." Terra's voice was flat. "That's all that matters." 

"Sorry. I take it you knew him well?" 

"Better than I wanted to." Terra grimaced. "I should hate him, for everything he's done, everything he's taken, but..." She shivered. "I don't remember everything about my past, even now. And I don't think I want to." She gave me a pointed look. 

"Then let's not talk about that." There was more to Kefka for me, I was sure; but now was not the time. "Do you mind if I ask you one thing about yourself, though?" 

"Not at all." 

"Why did you come back?" 

She froze in the act of opening one of the dresser drawers. "What are you talking about?" 

"The place you found me. Locke told me you all thought I was dead, so what were you doing back there?" 

"What was I--oh!" She laughed. "I'm sorry, I thought you were talking about something else. Well, Locke told you about that. Did he tell you we were in a tower?" 

"And that it came down, yes." 

"That tower was Kefka's fortress. Twelve of us broke in and killed him. But when he died, the tower fell apart. We were running for our lives while the walls collapsed around us. You...didn't make it." She took a deep breath, and went on. "Anyway, we dropped quite a few things in the scramble--Celes almost got killed going back for one of them, in fact. It wasn't until we were safely out of the tower and recovered from your loss that I realized I'd dropped this." 

She lifted a loop of fine chain off her neck, and handed it to me. On the end was a silver pendant. It was an elaborately carved figurine of a woman; it had a few dents, but had been polished to a high shine. 

A trinket? "You came back for _this?!_" 

"It was my mother's." Terra's voice was distant and tentative. "It's the only thing of hers I have left, now." 

I winced. _Brilliant._ "I'm sorry, Terra. You must have been very close to her." 

She laughed sadly. "She died when I was very young. I hardly even knew her. But I could see how her death hurt my father. He used to tell me stories about her, and we'd both be crying at the end." 

"Where is your father now?" 

"Gone." Terra sighed, and replaced the pendant. "Well, I think we've covered all the low points in my life. Was there anything else?" 

I shook my head. "I'm really sorry I brought all that up, Terra. I didn't mean to hurt you like that." 

"Don't worry about it." She smiled weakly. "In a way, I guess you could say I should be thankful about it. The pendant, I mean. Because I dropped it, I had to come back to the rubble with Celes, Locke, and Setzer, and Locke found you. I lost my mother for a week...and got a friend back from the dead in return." 

I was still thinking of the expression in her eyes when I realized it was too dark to see. The hazel sparkled as it rarely did, even as they glistened with--_wait a minute._

Terra had green eyes. 

_MAIOREM HAC DILECTIONEM NEMO HABET   
UT ANIMAM SUAM QUIS PONAT PRO AMICIS SUIS_


	4. Chapter IV

**PRELIMINARIES:** None of this belongs to me. Final Fantasy VI, and all worlds, characters, etc. associated with it are the property of Square. Square is not affiliated in any way, shape, or form with the creation of this story (a fact for which, I suspect, they would be profoundly grateful). I have made liberal usage of their characters and settings in this story; this was done without their knowledge or permission, and is technically an infringement of Square's copyright. As this story is, at the most pragmatic level, free promotion of the Final Fantasy franchise, it is hoped that they will regard this story (if at all) with a benign ignorance. 

If you paid a wooden nickel for this story, not only have you been drastically overcharged, but whoever charged you has done so illegally, and I disavow any association with said individual(s). 

This story is archived in .txt and .htm format at my website, The Codex Scribanus (see author profile). In the highly unlikely event that you wish to have a copy of this story for your own site's archives, you'll find distribution guidelines there. 

All feedback is welcome, up to and including line-by-line critiques (provided they fit in my mailbox). 

Now, sit back and either enjoy the ride, or (more likely) enjoy thinking of what you'll do to me at the end of it...

* * *

_Shadow... _

What kind of a name is that, anyway? 

Shadow. 

Who are you? 

Shadow! 

What do you mean, "It's not time--" 

**"SHADOW!!!"**

Say what you will, under different circumstances. A woman screaming your name makes an effective alarm clock. 

I don't usually get up of my own volition before the sun rises, though; so when I opened my eyes to a darkened room, I knew something was wrong. 

To my great chagrin, I had an excellent idea what that something was. 

Splitting headache: Check. 

Vibrating teeth: Check. 

Shredded throat: Check. 

Sweat-drenched sheets: Check. 

Terra holding me down as if I were possessed: Check. 

"Not again." 

Groan in disgust: Check. 

Terra released me when she heard my voice, and I sat up, rubbing my head where it must have banged against the wall. "How do you feel?" she asked. 

Five screaming nightmares in five nights. That, I thought, entitled me to reply, "As usual." That is to say, I felt like crap, and knew I would not be able to go back to sleep for the rest of the night. Not because I couldn't close my eyes without being assaulted by a dozen screaming spawns of Setzer--I didn't even remember the dreams--but because my body had tensed up, and would refuse to relax sufficiently to return to my slumber. 

I pushed back the covers, swung my feet over the side of the bed, and pulled on my robe. Even though it was already warm in the room, I welcomed the extra weight; it was the one article of clothing I'd flat-out insisted that Terra buy. 

I stood, and padded over to the window. The boards creaked behind me; a moment later, I felt a nudge at my elbow and slid aside to make room for Terra. We stood there at the window in silence, watching the night sky. 

I never tired of watching the stars, or the moon, or the ocean. It was both soothing and exhilarating; and if it didn't help me sleep, at least it made me feel better. 

And speaking of which... 

I glanced up at the moon, and mentally calculated its position in the sky. The night was about half-over. Which meant that I had about five hours to kill before dawn. 

"Terrific," I muttered. 

"Shadow?" 

I jumped. I'd forgotten that Terra was there. "Sorry." 

"No need." There was a pause; then, Terra laid a hand on my shoulder. "We'll beat this, Shadow. I promise you." 

"I hope so." I sighed and turned back to my bed. I couldn't sleep, but I should at least rest my eyes. "I can't take much more of this." 

Terra's back was turned, and her voice was soft as I rustled the covers; I probably wasn't supposed to hear her response. 

"Neither can I." 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

**_LEAP OF FAITH_**

A Final Fantasy VI Fanfic 

by 

Lunaludus Scribex 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

**CHAPTER IV**

Mornings, of late, had been exercises in sheer frustration; today promised to be no different. It began--well, technically, it began when I woke up. But I stopped pretending I might fall asleep again with the coming of the dawn. 

I sat up, slipped on my robe, and hobbled out of the room. 

Now, for the most part, I obeyed Celes' mandate to stay in bed. However, when it was discovered that I'd regained the strength to navigate the second floor of the inn, we ("we" being Terra and myself) agreed to an exception, for the sake of my comfort, if not Terra's sanity--a morning trip to the baths. 

The inn had two baths on the second floor--one for men, and one for women, though which was which depended on who got there first, and was liable to change at any given hour. Each had a paper curtain that, when drawn, could divide the room; however, I'd never seen them both used, because that was around the time the nightmares started, and few people bathed at dawn. None, actually--except me. In fact, I'd even beaten the hot water to the baths once or twice. 

So I was surprised to find that this morning, someone had beaten me. The curtain was drawn across one of the baths. "Hello?" Who was up this early? 

"Shadow?" It was Terra. 

"Good morning." I pulled the second curtain into place behind me, noting the narrow "hallway" the two barriers formed, and slipped into the men's bath. I was pleased to see that if I was a little slower than usual, so were the servants--the water was still just a notch below scalding, which did wonders for my aching muscles. 

I couldn't let myself get _too_ relaxed, though. I'd found out the hard way a couple of days before that taking a nap could have..._unpleasant_ consequences. I had to stay awake. 

And speaking of which--"What are you doing up so early?" 

"I...I couldn't sleep." 

_Uh-oh._ One of us on the verge of collapse was bad enough. "Why?" 

"I--I just couldn't...I couldn't get them out of my head..." 

"Terra?" 

"I couldn't forget your screams." 

_You just had to ask, didn't you?_ I sank a little lower in the water. Terra continued after a moment. "The pain I heard--what happened to you, Shadow?" 

"How do you mean?" 

"I've seen you sleep before...before Kefka...you were never like this. But every night--since you woke up, not just this past week--you've had nightmares." 

"How would you know--" _Wait a sec._ "You've been watching me sleep." 

"We took shifts before the others left...but yes, I have." 

_I'm sorry._ So there _was_ someone in my room. But who? What were they apologizing for? And... "Why?" 

"I'm worried about you, Shadow. This isn't good for you." 

No kidding. "What do you think it is?" 

"I don't know...maybe you had these nightmares before Kefka's death." 

_What?_ "But how? You just said--" 

"You had a great deal of self-control, Shadow, and it was deeply ingrained. You might have known a way not to show it when you were asleep." 

"But I would have forgotten it along with everything else?" 

"You might have. Something like that would have been at an unconscious level by now, but you were all but dead when we found you. If that's the case, at least we have someplace to start from." 

"You'll forgive me if I don't dance for joy at the thought of dealing with these things for the rest of my life." 

"It's better than the alternative." 

"Which is?" 

Silence. 

"Terra?" 

"...It could be your memories." 

"My memories? What do you--you mean my _memories_ could be causing the nightmares?!" 

"Yes." 

Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse! Terra was right to tell me not to force my memories--if they were behind the nightmares, remembering could drive me insane. 

Bad things, indeed. 

There was a loud splash, then I heard the other curtain being pulled aside. "Shadow, I'm going to bring some soup to your room." 

"All right." Then, as the thought occurred to me, "Terra, how long have you suspected my memories are behind those dreams?" 

The door paused in mid-creak. "A while, Shadow," Terra said. "A while." 

_Click._

"Wonderful." I sat back in the bath and growled. This was not shaping up to be a good day. "What do I do now?" 

I didn't expect an answer. 

I wasn't disappointed.

* * *

"What kind of fighter was I?" 

I didn't mean to ask. The question was one of a hundred that tumbled about in my mind as I poked at my cold lunch and fervently hoped the doctor would approve solid food this afternoon. It just happened to be the one that popped out. 

Terra raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?" 

That was just a little too quick to be unrehearsed. "You know what I mean. If I helped take out Kefka, I must have been a powerful warrior." 

"Not necessarily. Does 'Relm' ring any bells?" At my negative, "She was one of the others that broke into Kefka's tower. In fact, she was one of our most powerful members." A pause. "She's thirteen." 

_"Thirteen?!"_ My bowl fell from my hands with a loud clatter, sending the cold broth cascading across the floorboards. While I hacked around the soup in my lungs, Terra grabbed a napkin and stooped to attack the mess on the floor. 

After a moment, I moved to help, but she stopped me with an upraised hand. "I can handle this, and you need to save your strength." 

_Save my strength..._

_Strength..._

_...!_

I sat back on the bed, and contemplated the birth of an idea. 

Terra spoke up from the floor. "I'm surprised you didn't recognize Relm's name. She took Interceptor home with her when you...went under." 

I felt my hackles rise. "Interceptor?" 

"You don't remember him, either?" 

The name seemed familiar, certainly, but... "Should I?" 

"Er...let's just say you were a lot closer to him than I'll ever be. He really doesn't like me." Terra took a final swipe with the napkin and dropped it in the bowl. "You'll see him again soon enough. Locke and Celes are sure to have picked him up." 

I shook my head. "We're getting off-topic here. How did a teenager help take down a god?" 

She sat back in her chair and gave me an enigmatic smile. "Magic." 

I watched her skeptically, looking for some hint of a joke. There was none. _Oh...kay._ "And was I dangerous, too, because of this 'magic'?" That probably came off just a bit more sarcastic than I intended it. 

Terra didn't react to it, if she noticed it. Of course, she didn't answer my question, either. "Why are you so interested in what kind of a fighter you were, anyway?" 

I hadn't been, when I asked. "I thought that the disciplines that let me control those dreams might be tied into any training I might have had." 

Terra grasped my implied suggestion almost immediately. "Oh, no. No way, Shadow. I'm not teaching you to fight again." 

"I doubt you could, if I specialized in a weapon like the Striker. But I think at least some of the forms are still there--if I can push myself, and rebuild my stamina..." 

_"No!"_ Terra slammed her hand against the wall. She took a breath, then went on. "Shadow, anything else I'll be more than happy to help you with. But don't ask. Not for this." 

"If you have a better idea, I'd love to hear it. I'm running out of time." I'd almost collapsed on my way back from the baths. 

"Anything's better than that!" She threw up her hands. "You're getting ahead of yourself. You don't even know if the doctor will let you out of bed, let alone what he'll think of your idea." 

"We'll see what he has to say, then." 

"Fine." 

It wasn't until after she left that I realized Terra still hadn't answered my question.

* * *

My doctor didn't have a problem with answering my questions. 

I could never get control of a conversation long enough to ask him one. 

He was a strange little man, a wrinkled old dwarf with no hair to speak of, save for two slate-colored tufts that sprang up defiantly behind his ears. He was anything but frail, though; his eyes almost literally glowed with energy, and his tiny frame was well nigh indestructible. He didn't walk from place to place; he _bounced._

None of this explained how he managed to enter my room through the second-story window. 

On the other hand, did I really want to know? 

He was consistent, if nothing else. The sun had barely begun its slow metamorphosis from yellow to red and stretched out to touch the stool when his silhouette popped into existence on the windowsill, blotting out the sunlight. He balanced there for a moment, chest thrust out and hands on his hips, then pulled his pipe from between his teeth and rapped sharply against the wall. 

"Knock, knock?" 

I sat back against the wall, crossed my arms, and glared. 

He cackled as he hopped down to the floor and bounded across the room to my bed. "So, my boy, how are you feeling?" 

"I'm still having those nightmares." The doctor checked up on me every other day; he'd been rather perturbed on his last visit to learn that the dreams that robbed me of my sleep were persisting. 

Now, he frowned. "That's not good, boy. Not good at all." He gestured imperiously with his pipe. I sighed, then pushed back the covers and clambered to my feet, leaning heavily against the wall. He hopped onto the bed and began poking and prodding my chest. 

"Doctor, about my nightm--_oof!_" 

He looked up as he removed the pipe from my solar plexus. "You have a theory?" 

"Terra...Terra said..." I put my hands on my knees and took a deep breath. "She said my memories might be behind them." 

"She did, did she?" He rubbed his chin. "Hmm...if that were the case, then..." Before I could blink, he was down by my ankles; then, I was face-down across the bed, and he was on my back, hands rifling from point to point, never staying in one place longer than a few seconds. "So tell me, my boy," he said as he worked, "where is that ravishing nurse of yours, anyway?" 

"Shopping." I smiled into the mattress. Terra's first and, if she had anything to say about it, only encounter with my doctor began with a wolf-whistle, consisted of a series of slaps (on her part) and increasingly outrageous propositions (on his), and was capped off when he dared lay a hand on her hip. Terra reacted to this with a display that left little doubt that she could very well have taken down a god (possibly by herself); since then, she'd made a point of being out when he was in. 

"Pity." He sighed. "I was--what in the..." His hands froze over the base of my neck. "Now this is--_three?!_" One hand trailed down my spine, while the other pressed firmly on my right shoulder blade. "Well I'll be damned..." 

"Doctor, what--" 

"Quiet, boy, I'm not finished yet." A few seconds passed; then, the doctor hopped down to the floor in front of me. He took my chin in one hand. "Look me straight in the eyes, and tell me the instant you feel any pain." He brought the other hand to rest lightly on my temple, and pressed. 

He did not press any harder than he did at first. "Why would I feel pain? Doctor, what's--" 

**-FLASH-**

_"--look out!"_

I stumbled to the side, struggling to keep my balance as I ran. A crossbow bolt shot through the space where my head had been, and I glared at my companion across its wake. "You just _had_ to gloat, didn't you?" I hopped over a log. "Couldn't leave well enough alone. A clean getaway's enough for anyone else, but not for you! Oh, _no!_" I gripped the neck of my sack a little tighter, entertaining a brief fantasy of doing the same with _his_ neck. "No, _you_ have to rub it in their faces, so now we've got a dozen Domani on our trail! Brilliant, Baram, just--" 

"Will you...shut up...and _run_ already!" Baram was not in good shape. His run was closer to a stagger than a sprint; his hair was splattered across his face, and he held his side in pain with one hand while he dragged his sack behind him with the other. 

He stumbled and went to his knees just as another bolt whizzed overhead. "Damn!" He clambered to his feet, only to fall against a nearby tree, gasping for breath. 

I cursed. "Quick! Off the road!" 

We plunged into the brush, dodging branches left and right. I spotted a small incline behind a log, and pointed it out to Baram. He pointed back the way we came, and I nodded. 

We laid flat against the incline--Baram facing the way we came to watch for the soldiers, me facing forward to watch for...well, anything else. 

_Not that we stand much of a chance either way._ "Baram, how many knives have you got left?" 

"Five, I think. You?" 

"Three." 

"Shit." 

"Yeah." 

The next few moments passed in silence; then, some leaves rustled nearby. I froze. Nearly a full minute went by before a rabbit hopped out of the bushes and I let out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding. "Baram, remind me again why we hit a train going through the Phantom Forest?" 

"Element of surprise. Only a complete idiot would try it." 

"And that makes us...?" 

"It was your idea." 

"Oh. Yeah." 

Another five minutes passed in silence. 

Then ten. 

Then fifteen. 

Then twenty. 

Finally, Baram spoke. "It's too quiet." 

"Do you think they missed us?" 

"With all the noise we were making?" He snorted. "Besides, a blind man could spot our entry point." 

"So what are they waiting for?" 

"Good question." He began to climb over the log. "I'm going to check it out." 

"You sure you're up to it? I can go, if you're--" 

"I'm fine. Besides, I've got more knives." That wouldn't make a difference either way, and we both knew it, but I let it pass. He turned back to look at me. "You know the drill." 

"Asthmatic chocobo means 'Run.' Gotcha." I grinned at his glare. "I'll be waiting." 

I didn't have to wait long. Barely two minutes passed before I heard the "all clear"--a blackbird, high-low-high. That worried me, because it should have taken longer to secure the road. Thoughts of betrayal ran briefly through my mind, but were dismissed just as quickly; train robbers would receive no mercy under the crown, and Baram knew that. 

I tripped over the soldier's corpse and fell flat on my face just as I reached the path. 

Baram's laughter washed over me as I scrambled to my feet, spitting out dirt and cursing, but it was only a shadow of its usual self. His face was pale, and as I caught a glimpse of the bodies scattered across the road, I understood why. 

It was ugly. There was blood everywhere, and great gaping holes had been dug out of flesh and armor alike. The soldier I stumbled over had managed to get his sword out of its scabbard, and rigor mortis kept it firmly in his grasp, even when the forearm had been torn off at the elbow. His dead eyes were wide with terror, and his mouth was open in a silent scream. 

I looked up at Baram. "How could we not have heard this?" 

"Look at the wounds." 

I turned back to the corpse. "What do the wounds have to do with--_oh shit._ Baram, please tell me these aren't what I think they are." 

He nodded grimly. "Tooth marks." 

The entire Doman squadron had been eaten alive. And we hadn't heard a single thing, barely fifty feet away. 

_Quiet. Too quiet._

"Ghosts." I spat on the ground. "I _hate_ ghosts." 

"Let's not stick around, then." 

"I can't argue with that. Is there anything salvageable on these guys?" 

"Want a sword?" 

"Couldn't hurt--I'm almost out of knives." I pried the hilt of my man's sword out of his grip, ignoring the _snapping_ sound his fingers made, and took an experimental swipe. It was longer than it needed to be, but the balance was still good. "Are the crossbows intact?" 

Silence. 

"Baram?" 

I turned around. Baram had his back to a tree, with a ghost in his face and its hand around his throat. 

**-FLASH-**

"Gaaah!" I jerked back from the doctor's grip and gasped. "What the hell was that?!" 

The doctor merely raised an eyebrow. "Did it hurt?" 

"Did it hurt?" I spluttered. "_Did it hurt?!_ I just saw--" 

"Answer the question, boy. Did it hurt?" 

"Of _course_ it--huh?" There was pain...wasn't there? _I know I felt something..._

He crossed his arms and smirked. "So, saw something, did you boy? Not surprising, all things considered. What do you recall?" 

"I was in a forest." I frowned. "There was a man with me. His name was...Bart? Barak? No..." I closed my eyes and leaned forward to rest my forehead on my fingertips. "We were...chasing? No, being chased...ergh..." I gritted my teeth. 

The right hook came out of nowhere. 

_"Idiot!"_ The doctor scowled at me as I looked up from the floor in a daze. "I asked for what you recalled, not what you could strain out of your subconscious!" 

"Huh?" 

He shook his head. "Get back on the bed." He bopped me lightly on the forehead as I did so. "I was going to try some dampening techniques, but if you reacted that poorly to a _benign_ memory--" 

"Doctor." I pitched my voice flat in an effort to keep the irritation out of my voice. 

He sighed. "Basically, my boy, your lovely little caretaker is mostly right." 

"Mostly?" 

"Your nightmares are being caused by a number of severe traumatic experiences. Three of them, to be exact. Normally, they would be buried, so to speak, in your subconscious; but your mind is a real mess right now, so when the conscious shuts down, those memories float to the top." 

"Great." 

"It is, isn't it?" He sighed again. "I was going to try and put some sort of buffer around those three memories, but I don't think that's such a good idea now." 

"Why not?" 

"Because you'd have to see each of those memories the way you just saw that last one, and that was a _benign_ memory--not one of the really bad ones." 

_That was a memory?_ I closed my eyes, and a badly mutilated corpse filled my sight. They snapped open as I swallowed down a bout of nausea. "I don't know that I'd call that memory benign, doctor." 

He waved his pipe dismissively. "It's relative. But that leaves _you_ in a bit of a quandary, boy." My stomach sank as he jabbed at my chest. "I played around a bit with your body's networks so that your excess energy will go to rebuilding those mental defenses. Even so, the nightmares are going to keep going for another week, at least." 

"Another week?! I'm never going to last that long the way I'm going!" 

"Now, now, we're going to do something about that, too. But first, tell me--do you wake up from these nightmares on your own?" 

"No, Terra wakes me up." 

"She does, does she?" He raised an eyebrow. "And just how does she do that?" 

I frowned. What was he getting at? "I tend to thrash around a lot during those dreams, so she has to physically restrain me." Something about the look in his eyes... "She holds me down on the bed while she keeps screaming...my...name..." _Wait a second._

He put a finger to his chin and grinned widely. "Go on, go on, it's just getting good!" 

I flushed beet-red. "It's not like _that!_" 

"Oh it isn't, is it?" He laughed at my disgusted expression, and lightly tapped my head. "Come _on,_ boy! You've got a goddess like that waiting on you hand and foot, and you haven't even considered it?! Yes, I know," he continued, holding up a hand to forestall my objection, "look what he did to the poor doctor! But think about it, boy--why else would she have stayed behind to take care of you when all her friends went away?" 

"She used to have amnesia too--that's why she stayed." 

"So she says." I fixed him with a level glare, and he threw up his hands. "All right, all right, I give up! Let her go away heartbroken and desolate. Rejected, desperate for human comfort, she'll have no choice but to seek consolation on the lap of the friendly neighborhood doctor--" He broke off at my chuckle and gave me a hurt look. 

"I'm sorry, doctor, just the image of that--that--" 

"I'm glad you find it so amusing, boy." The levity abruptly fled his tone. "Your lovely nurse is cutting your recovery off at the knees; I thought you should get _something_ recuperative out of the whole deal!" 

That killed the laughter almost immediately. "What do you mean?" 

"I mean, boy, that your body's reactions to the dreams are something akin to sleepwalking, and the worst possible thing she could do is wake you up in the middle of it! The first thing we're going to do is let you sleep through the night. NO WAKEUP CALLS. You may feel bad in the morning, but at least it'll _be_ morning, and you should be awake." 

I grimaced. "Tell that to the innkeeper." He'd let me know in no uncertain terms yesterday that he was sick and tired of hearing complaints from his other tenants about my midnight screeching. "He's close enough to kicking us out as it is." 

"_I'll_ handle the innkeeper. You just worry about yourself." He cackled, and patted me on the shoulder. "Chin up, boy! Things are going to work out, so don't sit there looking like a rhinox! Smile a little!" 

With no little hesitation, I managed a weak grin. "If you say so, doctor." 

"I do say so, boy. And now, let's move on to happier subjects." 

"Such as?" 

"Solid food." 

There was nothing weak or hesitant about my smile this time.

* * *

Neither of us was wholly pleased with the final verdict. True to his word, the doctor had browbeaten the innkeeper into accepting that his boarders would have trouble sleeping for a while longer. And then, true to form, he had vanished into thin air, leaving the innkeeper to inform Terra of _her_ role in my problem--a spectacle that could be heard throughout the inn and had the servants buzzing for days afterward. Details were sketchy, but from what I could gather, the innkeeper did considerably more than "inform," and Terra did not take it at all kindly. 

Thus, she was not in the best of moods when she discovered that I had brought up the question of exercise near the end of the examination, and that the doctor had casually issued me a virtual _carte blanche._ Terra nearly had apoplexy when she heard _that;_ she stormed out of the inn and spent the next two hours hunting him down (an irony which, I gather, amused him greatly--at first, anyway). I don't know what exactly she said while dragging him back to the inn, but he entered my room--through the door--wearing a severely chastened expression. He summarily limited the exercise he would permit to brisk walking--which, considering my long legs, was tantamount to rescinding it altogether--then dove out the window before I could protest. 

Nonetheless, there were certainly things to be happy about. The doctor ended my mandatory bedrest and okayed me for solid foods, both of which called for a celebration. Thus it was that we found ourselves sharing a meal of breaded fish and some sort of fruit juice in the common room that evening. 

The common room was filled with people. There wasn't an empty table in the house; sailors lined the bar against the far wall, and their laughter rose and fell in an even, almost soothing cadence, a counterpoint to the lively flute a local minstrel played by the fireplace. It was, all things considered, a pleasant background. 

Our conversation was pleasant as well, if a bit tense. By unspoken agreement, Terra and I avoided the doctor's orders altogether; and in our fumbling for a topic, I stumbled by happy chance onto the others with whom we had fought Kefka. Terra seemed almost eager to speak about them, and after our arguments earlier in the day, I was happy simply to hear something--_anything_--about the past. 

The fact that Terra was a superb storyteller did not hurt at all. She spoke in anecdotes, painting portraits as vivid as they were amusing. There was Edgar, a natural leader and an incurable flirt; Gau, the fearless prankster of the group; Sabin, the good-natured butt of most of Gau's jokes; Cyan, a man with a sense of nobility exaggerated almost to the point of parody. 

Locke, I learned, had taken it upon himself to keep everyone humble; he wielded a rapier wit surpassed only by Relm, whom Terra had mentioned at lunch. Locke, however, had a sense of timing and moderation that Relm did not; she possessed (or was possessed of) a temper of which even Gau was wary. Both were almost constantly at loggerheads with Setzer, which did not surprise me at all. 

It did make me think of something, though. "Will Relm be coming on the _Falcon_?" 

"Probably." Terra finished her drink and signalled a passing waitress for another. "I doubt she'd let Interceptor out of her sight." 

"I hope there isn't too much trouble between her and Setzer during the flight." 

She smiled. "I doubt there'll be too much. Besides, with Celes there..." 

"You have a point." I shook my head. "I don't know. I just have a bad feeling for some reason....It's probably nothing." 

"Relax, Shadow." The waitress delivered Terra's drink, and she received it with a grateful nod. "You can't do anything about it, and worrying will only affect the things you _can_ change." 

"I guess so." I washed down the last of my fish, and sat back. "I think I'm going to take a walk around town tomorrow, maybe do a little shopping." 

"Not a bad idea--you could use some fresh air. Do you want some company?" 

"I wouldn't mind..." I trailed off as I saw a man dressed in the garb of a sailor approach our table. We turned to face him; as we did, I noticed that the bar had gone silent. "Can we help you?" 

"P'rapsh...ye can, bud." He seemed a bit unsteady on his feet, but his eyes were disturbingly bright. "I wush...wondrin'f I'd been hearin' wrong...did yon lash...call ye 'Shadow'?" 

I blinked, and glanced over at Terra. She had gone very still; her eyes narrowed, and her mouth was a flat line. "Yes, she did....is there a problem?" 

He chuckled. "'sh there...a problem, he says." A chill ran down my spine at his tone. I looked over his shoulder and saw two more men step away from the bar and turn in our direction. "You could say that." And before either of us could say anything further, he drew a knife and lunged for my chest. 

I froze. My eyes fixed on the glittering blade as it began its descent--and then sank into the tabletop, as Terra shoved the table into his midsection. _"Get down!"_ I fell out of my chair as Terra floored the sailor with a vicious jab between the eyes, then tipped the table over in front of me, nearly clipping my ankles. 

As I scrambled to my hands and knees, I heard a loud crash, and the bartender yelling, "Not in here! Take it outside!" I peered over the table, and saw one of the other men lying on--or rather, _in_--the bartop while Terra ducked a wild roundhouse punch from the third. She stepped to the side and delivered a crunching uppercut, and as she did so, my gaze was drawn to the scabbard that hung at her side. _A sword? She has a sword?!_ It took only a few seconds to realize that she had no intention of shedding blood, if she could avoid it. 

The sailor, though, clearly had no such compunctions. He regained his feet and drew another knife from his boot. "Terra! Behind you!" Terra and the sailor both spun around; unfortunately, I was about five feet closer to him than Terra was, and he seemed to realize that about the same time I did. I ducked down behind the table and braced myself against it--a very bad idea; he kicked me through the tabletop, catching me behind the ear and sending me sprawling. 

He stepped around the table, hefting his knife with one hand as he loomed over me. "Now you die," he snarled as he drew back to throw-- 

And screamed as Terra suddenly appeared behind him, sword drawn and sweeping across the backs of his knees. The blade came back streaked with red; he pitched forward, and I heard Terra curse as he extended the blade, aiming for my chest-- 

And then, almost of its own accord, my hand shot out, grasping his hand by the wrist and twisting sharply, sending the knife skittering across the floor. Undaunted, the sailor landed on my chest and reached for my throat; but before he could get there, Terra hauled him off of me. He continued to struggle, ignoring the streams of blood pouring down the backs of his legs. 

"I'm gonna kill you!" The sailor seemed both more coherent and sober now, screaming at the top of his lungs. "You bastard! You hear me? I'm gonna kill you like you--" 

Terra brought the pommel of her sword down on his skull, knocking him unconscious. I heard her say something about him needing a doctor, but I really wasn't paying attention at that point. 

The sailor had recognized me--recognized the name "Shadow." 

And he attacked me on sight. I stared at the hand that had disarmed him by sheer reflex. 

_I'm gonna kill you, like you--_

Like I what? Like I killed? 

Something didn't add up here. 

I heard someone clear his throat behind me, and turned to see the innkeeper, face pale. "Yes?" 

"I...er..." He swallowed. "Is it true what he said? You're...Shadow?" 

"Yes, but I don't know who he is--I'm sorry about the fight, I--" 

"No, no, no!" He waved his hands frantically. "It's not your fault, don't worry about it. I was wondering, though, if you'd mind retiring to your room for the night...please?" 

I looked at him suspiciously. "Are you sure? You know what's been happening at night of late..." I trailed off as he emitted a startled squeak. 

"D-don't worry about that, sir." His face was now white as a sheet. "We will not t-trouble you about it again, and p-please accept my apologies for the inconvenience." 

I felt a ball of ice form in my stomach. "All...all right, then." Terra had some explaining to do. "If you insist, I guess we'd best go, eh...huh?" 

Footsteps pounded by the stairwell. I turned just in time to catch a flash of green hair disappearing upstairs. 

"Terra?" 

_MAIOREM HAC DILECTIONEM NEMO HABET   
UT ANIMAM SUAM QUIS PONAT PRO AMICIS SUIS_


	5. Chapter V

**PRELIMINARIES:** None of this belongs to me. Final Fantasy VI, and all worlds, characters, etc. associated with it are the property of Square. Square is not affiliated in any way, shape, or form with the creation of this story (a fact for which, I suspect, they would be profoundly grateful). I have made liberal usage of their characters and settings in this story; this was done without their knowledge or permission, and is technically an infringement of Square's copyright. As this story is, at the most pragmatic level, free promotion of the Final Fantasy franchise, it is hoped that they will regard this story (if at all) with a benign ignorance. 

If you paid a wooden nickel for this story, not only have you been drastically overcharged, but whoever charged you has done so illegally, and I disavow any association with said individual(s). 

This story is archived in .txt and .htm format at my website, The Codex Scribanus (see author profile). In the highly unlikely event that you wish to have a copy of this story for your own site's archives, you'll find distribution guidelines there. 

All feedback is welcome, up to and including line-by-line critiques (provided they fit in my mailbox). 

Once again, I must thank Shack and Kami, my beta-readers, both for their invaluable assistance with this story and for putting up with me. I couldn't do it without you guys. 

Now, sit back and either enjoy the ride, or (more likely) enjoy thinking of what you'll do to me at the end of it...

* * *

**_What do you see?_**

_I see a...a knife._

**_Do you know it?_**

_I--yes, I know it. It's..._

_It's the Striker....?!_

**_What is it?_**

_Footsteps. I hear...footsteps...._

_Baram...?_

_Who--NO!_

**"ULENA!"**

With a loud cry I bolted up out of yet another nightmare and into my own personal hell--a kaleidoscope of light, color, and agony; ever changing, ever the same. 

Sometimes, the pain would focus on my stomach, a steady throbbing culminating in the return of my old nemesis the chocobo. At others, it would be my limbs or back that would suffer the aftermath of my sudden situps. 

This time, it was my head. My teeth shivered and vibrated so badly that I feared they would fall out, while my poor parched throat made breathing a conscious chore. My temples bore the brunt of the assault, though: a sharp, piercing sensation that was only exacerbated by the light shooting through the window, setting off small chains of explosions behind my eyeballs. It was--wait. LIGHT?! 

My head shot up of its own accord, exposing my unprotected eyes more fully to the white gold rays streaming into the room. I quickly threw my arms up over my face--so quickly, that the momentum carried me backwards, cracking my head against the wall. Yet, even as I rubbed my skull, a chuckle made its slow, tortured way to my lips. 

_SUNLIGHT!_

The doctor had done it! I rolled over the side of the bed--momentarily forgetting I was still tangled in the sheets--clambered free, and scrambled across the room, throwing myself headlong at the open window with such force that I almost fell through. 

Ever since that first night, I had wanted to see the wakened side of this jewel called Albrook. After so long, it seemed impossible for that long-awaited first glimpse to live up to my expectations. 

It came close. As I squinted and shielded my eyes from the full brunt of the morning light, my vision sought the horizon and beheld the sapphire airscape, vibrant and cloudless, stretching into the distance. The burning orb sitting prominent in its midst cast down a brilliant array of pearls upon the emerald sea, rippling and dancing among the numerous boats plying their trade. 

I closed my eyes for a moment, savoring the lightly salted caress of the morning breeze, before the tolling of a bell drew my attention to the docks. One of the boats was just casting off, and I could hear the sailors singing a shanty as they worked. 

_That sailor._ My mood darkened as I recalled last night. By the time I left the petrified innkeeper and followed Terra upstairs, she had already shut herself up in her room. She refused to answer my knocks, and I finally retired after telling her door that we _would_ be discussing this on the morrow. 

Concern for my state of mind was all well and good, but if there were others like that man... 

A timid knock interrupted my pessimistic reverie. I ambled over to the door, pausing to throw on my robe, and opened it a crack. A young maid stood before me, looking very much like she did not want to be there. 

"Y--_rrk!_" 

The maid jumped back at my strangled outburst. It was supposed to be _Yes?_, but I hadn't realized just how bad a state my throat was in. After a few seconds, she stepped forward again, peering at me cautiously. "M-master Shadow?" 

I nodded, not trusting my voice. 

"Master Paparo asked me to see if you were awake." I cocked my head to one side, and she flushed a deep red. "I--I mean, if there was anything you wanted! For breakfast?" 

"Oh." I sucked in a painful breath and thought. It figured that the innkeeper would want to keep me away from the other guests. "Just some fruit juice." What he really wanted was to keep _Shadow_ away...for whatever reason. 

A relieved look washed over the maid's face. "Thank you, thank you," she chirped, then bounced in a small curtsy before she realized how this must have looked to me. "I mean--that is--" 

I waved her off, my mind elsewhere. I needed some answers, and the sooner the better. "Could you let Terra know I'm up?" 

The maid hesitated. "Terra, sir?" I glared at her, and she let out a startled squeak. "I'm sorry, sir, please don't kill me, I thought you knew, I thought she'd told you, she said she'd taken care of things and I thought--" 

I grabbed her by the shoulders, and her babble cut off as if it had never existed. She flinched, and as I looked at her terrified visage her words finally registered. _Please don't **kill me?!**_

I forced my mind back to the matter at hand. "What is it?" I kept my voice at a low hiss to spare my throat. "Where's Terra?" 

The maid swallowed, her frightened eyes never leaving mine. "She left, M-master Shadow. I don't know where." 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

**_LEAP OF FAITH_**

A Final Fantasy VI Fanfic 

by 

Lunaludus Scribex 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

**CHAPTER V**

When I emerged from the baths and returned to my room, I found that the maid had left my juice on the corner table. She had also left a pouch and a letter addressed to me, both compliments of Terra. 

The pouch contained a fair quantity of gold, though not so much as to be noticeably heavy, and the Striker, nestled snugly in a reinforced leather sheath which I strapped around my waist. Terra's letter, in addition to warning me not to look for her, suggested that I visit an apothecary on the outskirts of Albrook to see about some medicine. With little else to do, I decided to take her advice. 

Thus it was that I found myself standing in front of a door bearing the ever-so-reassuring title of "World's End," with my hand resting on the knob--just as it had been for the past five minutes. I could not say why, but something about this ramshackle mound of brick set my nerves on end. 

Still, I couldn't stand here all day. I took a deep breath, then pulled open the door and stepped inside. 

The door slammed shut behind me, cutting off the light from outside. I breathed in sharply, then broke off in a violent fit of coughing as my lungs sampled the smoky interior and found it not to their liking. I hunched over, hands on my knees, and let the fit run its course before I looked up to take in the shop's interior. 

I had to stifle another gasp. The only light inside World's End came from a pair of braziers in the far corners of the room. They cast a thin layer of smoke over the entire shop, while their dim glow illuminated a multifaceted rainbow of bottles, vials, and other vessels that stretched clear across the three far walls. They shimmered and glowed through the balsam-scented veil, and for a long moment I simply stared, almost forgetting to breathe. 

"Can I help you?" 

The voice came out of nowhere, and I let out a strangled shriek as I spun around. Then, I saw its source. "_Gah!_" 

The shopkeeper of World's End was recognizably human...barely. His skin was nearly as pale as Setzer's, with a limp black mat of hair and bags under his sunken eyes that nearly reached his chin. He was a hunchback, and kept his hands clasped before him, rubbing his palms in a manner that did not set me at all at ease, given the almost lecherous sparkle in his eyes. 

As I gaped, he cocked his head to one side. "I said, 'Can I help you?'" The ghoulish voice fit his body perfectly. 

I shook myself out of my daze. "Uh..." I winced at my throat's reaction, and dropped my voice to a whisper. "I'm looking for some medicine, I was told you might have it." 

"Of course." He smiled, and had my head not been swimming from the incense, I would have turned tail and run. "What are you looking for--elixir? Incense? Herbs?" 

I blinked. "Pardon?" 

He sighed loudly, and rolled his eyes to the ceiling. "What ails you, friend?" Judging from his tone, I wasn't the first to fail to understand the question. 

"Oh." I choked down a brief surge of irritation. "Headache and sore throat." 

"Hm..." The shopkeeper rubbed his chin, then clapped. "I have a tonic in back that should help. Please, wait here." He turned away, then glanced over his shoulder. "How many doses?" 

"Ah...five, I think." 

"Five tonics...250 gold pieces, then. Very good, sir. Please wait here." He ambled to the far end of the room, stepped behind a table, and sank into the floor. 

...sank into the floor? I blinked. I couldn't have seen that right....I walked over to the table. There, almost indistinguishable in the half light, I found a staircase cut into the ground. I could still hear the shopkeeper's footsteps receding as he descended. 

I shrugged and turned away. As I did, a vial on the shelves to my right caught my eye. There was nothing special about it--just a plain blue vessel in a sea of greens, reds, and purples--but something about it captured my attention. It seemed almost...familiar. 

I reached over, grasped the vial between thumb and forefinger, and held it up to the sparse light. The solution inside shifted as I tilted it; it was almost clear, with only the slightest hint of a mist within. 

Why was this so familiar? Was it some kind of medicine? I carefully removed the stopper, and lifted the vial to my nose. 

"NO!" 

I blinked. "Eh?" Only a second before, I was sniffing at the vial; now, it lay shattered at my feet, while the shopkeeper stood before me with an almost terrified expression. "What--_ack!_" 

The shopkeeper drove a fist into my gut. As I doubled over, he forced my head back and jammed another vial into my mouth, pouring a truly vile concoction down my throat. He ignored my coughs and protests as a good portion of...whatever it was went down my windpipe instead. "Drink it! Drink, damn you!" 

After what seemed like an eternity, I managed to choke down enough of the liquid to satisfy him, and he shoved me roughly to the floor. "You _idiot!_" As I sat up, rubbing my back, he towered over me with a glare that almost made him look like my doctor. "What did you think you were doing, playing with my poisons?" 

I looked up sharply. "P--_poison?!_" 

"Yes! Poison!" A hunchback, I was discovering, could be very intimidating when looking down on you. "What did you think they were--fertilizer?!" 

"What in the world do you carry poison for?!" 

"Rats, mice, you know." Still scowling, he stepped back and allowed me to regain my feet. I adjusted the Striker on my waist, and his eyes lit up, the frown melting away. "I do weapons treatments, too--can't be too careful, with all the monsters running around outside." 

"Thanks, but it's already been treated. I--" 

"All the better, then! There's only one knife I know that doesn't need to be re-treated from time to time, and I doubt you have it. Let me take a look, and I'll tell you what it's got. How about it?" 

I looked down at my knife. Locke had seemed awfully nervous about it. What _was_ so special about this weapon, anyway? "Well, all right." We walked over to the table, and I reached across my body and tried to draw the Striker. It only got partway out before it caught in its sheath, and I looked at it in puzzlement. 

"Problem?" 

I ignored his amused expression. "No, no problem." What good was a weapon that you couldn't draw? After two more attempts with my right hand, I gave up and tried to use my left. It felt awkward (and probably looked even worse) but I finally managed to draw the Striker and place it on the wooden surface. "What can you tell me about this?" 

I glanced up, only to see him staring at me with wide, horrified eyes. "That's...that's the..._where did you get that?_" 

I blinked, taken aback by the intensity of his response. "...I found it." 

"You 'found' the Striker." He snorted. "Friend, I hope you picked that knife off of Shadow's cold dead body. I wouldn't want to be in your shoes if he's still alive!" 

"Let me worry about that." I did my best to sound confident. I don't think I did very well. "What can you tell me about it?" 

"You knew this was the Striker, didn't you?" I nodded. "Well, then you probably know most of it already. Great balance, damn near indestructible, and it's treated with one of the deadliest poisons I've ever seen." 

"What poison?" 

"Couldn't say for sure--this is that one knife I was talking about before. Black lotus, probably. Likely some greenwort and mandrake dust, as well. I _can_ tell you that once that stuff gets into your bloodstream, you're dead. Paralysis sets in almost instantly, and it hits the heart and lungs within half a minute. I should know--I saw Shadow use it once." He shuddered. "That was one time too many, if you ask me." 

_I risked my life to get this thing?_ A chill ran down my spine. "Why do you say that?" 

"Because it was _Shadow,_ that's why." He shook his head. "Anyway, I have your tonics here. That will be five hundred gold pieces." 

"Five hundred?! But before, you said two hundred fifty!" 

He gave me a withering look. "That includes the poison you wasted, the antidote I had to waste on _you,_ and my appraisal of that...thing." 

I smiled weakly. "I see." I counted out the money, and turned to go. 

"A free word of advice," the shopkeeper called out as I reached the door. "Get rid of that knife as soon as you can. It's not good for anything other than killing, and it's almost as much a status symbol as a weapon--everyone will want to take out the man that killed Shadow." 

I stopped and turned back to him. "And if Shadow is still alive?" 

The shopkeeper smiled at me. It was not a nice smile. "In that case, friend, I hope there's enough of you left to bury."

* * *

I frowned as I stood in the shade outside World's End, draining the first of the tonics. Piecing together my past had been, thus far, much like working a jigsaw puzzle with only the corners. The shopkeeper had just provided me with a sizable piece, and I didn't like the picture that was beginning to form. 

_First the sailor, then the innkeeper, now this._ Even Terra had hinted that there were skeletons in my closet. I rested my left hand on the Striker in its sheath. Who _was_ Shadow, anyway? 

I specialized in the Striker, obviously. But what kind of a fighting style was that? A knife was a close-quarters weapon--useless from afar, unless I threw it; and if I missed, where would that leave me? 

Did I simply rely on my speed to get close? That would explain some of my scars, surely, but not all of them. And given how much trouble I'd had drawing the Striker-- 

I blinked. It _should_ have been easier. So why...? 

I looked down at my weapon again. And when the answer finally hit me, I struck my forehead in turn. 

The sheath was _backwards._ I'd buckled it on the wrong side! 

I glanced around, then hastily took off my belt and rebuckled it the right way. The Striker now rested just behind my right hip, within easy reach of my strong hand. I gripped the hilt, and frowned again. Now, I could draw easily--but the point would face down, not upwards. That suggested a quick slash, drawing and striking all in one motion--perfect for a weapon as lethal as the Striker. 

It still didn't answer the question of what I did about enemies from a distance, though. Somehow, I doubted someone like Kefka, whatever he was like, would let me get close. 

A flash of light down by the seafront caught my attention. It came, I realized a moment later, from the top of one building on the shoreline--from...a giant pair of crossed swords? 

I glanced down at the Striker again. 

Perhaps I should look for a knife after all.

* * *

A great burst of light assaulted me as I opened the door to Leo's Sabers, Etc. With the sun behind me, I was unprepared for the white, blinding flash that enveloped me as I stepped inside. I stopped and blinked rapidly in a vain attempt to acclimate myself to my surroundings. Soft, soothing music was carried from the far end of the store by a light, cooling breeze. 

"Welcome..." 

The spots finally began to clear from my eyes, and I took in the interior. Leo's Sabers, Etc. was lit by a series of lamps set along the four walls of the store. Opposite each lamp was a large shield--brass and iron, alternately--polished to a high shine. It was this barrage of reflected light that had left me insensate. 

"...sucker?" 

At one end of the shop stood a long counter. Behind it, a young woman leaned forward, watching me intently. 

My mind finally registered her words. "I beg your pardon?" 

She smiled. "I said, 'Welcome to Leo's Sabers, Et cetera. Can I help you, sir?'" 

I peered at her more closely. She had short hair, cut long on the bangs so as to frame her face almost like a helmet. This served to draw attention to her deep brown eyes, which blinked innocently even as I watched. 

I sighed, and let the slight go. "I don't know. I'm looking for a knife...I think." 

The woman's eyes lit up, and she glanced down to my waist. "A trade-in?" 

I followed her gaze to the Striker. "No." Her face fell. "That is, this one is poison-treated--I need another knife, one that won't kill at first blood." 

"You sure?" I nodded, and she sighed. "All right then. Let's see here...." She turned, and began rummaging around outside of my view. 

I looked down at the counter. Though it was solid wood, the top had been hollowed out, and a number of weapons rested under the glass. 

One of them was a knife that looked about the same size as the Striker. "What about that one?" I asked, pointing. 

She stood back up, glanced down at the counter and shook her head. "You don't want that one. I've got a much better knife right here...._Voila!_" 

...It was a knife, all right. I could just make that out--but this blade glowed in the lights of the shop even more than the shields that lined the walls. I gripped the hilt and hefted...only to have it drop back to the countertop under the unexpected weight. This thing was heavier than my hip pack! 

"What is this?!" 

She smirked triumphantly. "Pure gold blade. You can't go wrong with this beauty!" Her grin expanded into a smile, and suddenly the knife wasn't the most blinding thing in the shop. 

I flinched back and squinted. "How much?" 

"A bargain--seven thousand gold pieces." 

Terra had only given me ten thousand. "You've got to be kidding me." 

"No, really!" I moved to put the knife back on the counter, and she grabbed my wrist with an uncallused hand. "Go ahead, try it!" 

"All right." I glared at her as I stepped away. "This had better be worth it." 

"Oh, it is." 

I hefted the knife and glanced down at the Striker, then shook my head. This blade was too heavy--there was no way I'd manage an upward slice. 

So. Upright it was. I turned away from the smirking clerk, and felt my weight shift forward as I fell into a low crouch. My right arm was wrapped across my body, with the flat of the blade resting against my left biceps. It felt right, somehow. 

I rolled back on my heels, then lunged forward, snapping the knife out and across at chest level-- 

"Ack!" 

--and, I noted as I looked at the knife, very nearly snapping the blade in the process. It had been bent at a right angle by the force of my swing. I gripped the blade between my thumb and forefinger, and bent it back into position. It was as soft and pliable as tin. 

"Pure gold." I looked up at the gaping clerk. "I don't suppose you have one with a paper blade, as well?" 

She swallowed and shook her head. 

"What else do you have?" 

That shook her out of her daze. "What else--hey! Aren't you going to pay for that?!" 

I positioned the blade at an angle over the glass counter and pressed. It folded like an accordion. 

I looked from the knife to the woman. 

"Right. Um..." 

An unusual, star-shaped knife caught my attention as she removed the countertop. "What's that?" 

She followed my gaze, and made a face. "_That?_ Don't even waste your time. It's some kind of fancy steak knife, that's all!" 

I picked up the knife, holding one sharp end between my thumb and first two fingers. _No hilt._ It seemed familiar, somehow... 

"See? It's useless! You can't even hold it strongly enough to press without cutting yourself!" I glanced at the shield behind her. _Wait a second..._ "It's a waste of--_eep!_" With one swift motion, I drew back and whipped the star forward. It buried itself in the center of the shield. 

_A throwing knife._ Now it made sense. I used the Striker when I got in close range, and when I was far away, I used these...these... 

"Shuriken." 

The clerk's head whipped from the shield to my face, and her eyes narrowed. "How did you..." She clapped her hands over her mouth, but it was too late. 

_Steak knives, huh?_ "You knew what these were." She nodded reluctantly. "How much?" 

"...Thirty each." 

"I'll take twent--" Her face lit up. "Ten." 

She groaned, but made no other protest. 

"Now..." I gestured to the Striker-like knife I'd seen before. "Show me." 

She handed it to me without a word. 

"Well? What can you tell me about this one?" 

She refused to look me in the eye. "It's called the Blossom." 

I waited a moment, but she said nothing more, so I turned my attention to the knife. It was lighter--not as light as the Striker, of course, but a good deal better than that golden monstrosity I'd tried earlier. I would be able to try a Striker-like slash with this one. 

I reversed my grip on the Blossom, and brought it to rest behind my right hip, over the sheathed Striker. As I lowered in a crouch, my left foot extended out, and I nodded as I thought about it. The force needed to draw the knife from the sheath would already be turning me to the left, so if I pivoted in that direction, I could get greater momentum, and a stronger cut. 

It would also turn me around, I realized, leaving my back exposed. So one strike only...but most of my scars were on the front of my body, not the back. How could I be an effective fighter when-- 

I slapped my thigh with my free hand as I realized. That would only be the case if I were _standing still._ Running past the enemy would leave only one side of my body exposed--the side where the Striker would cut--and my momentum as I went past would turn me around to face the enemy again--at his back, with my weapon already drawn and ready. 

Fast and effective. 

But did it only work on the one side of my body? That didn't seem right.... 

_Only one way to find out._ I shifted the Blossom from my right hand to my left, and reversed my stance. My knees dipped...and then I exploded upwards, the knife tracing a vicious uppercut as I completed my spin facing the clerk. The look on her face was priceless--a look of fear, of regret, of... 

I shook myself. What was I thinking? I stepped back to the counter, and laid the Blossom down on top of it. Why would she have shown me that gold knife before this one? I had a hunch, but... "How much?" 

Her head drooped. "3200." 

Bingo. "I'll take it." 

She sighed as she retrieved my shuriken and a sheath for the Blossom. "Three thousand, five hundred gold pieces. I don't suppose there's anything else?" 

"No...well, maybe." It couldn't hurt, could it? I finished buckling the Blossom behind my left hip, and looked up. "I'm looking for a woman." The clerk scowled at me, and I held up my hands. "We got separated this morning. Green hair, green eyes, wears a sword--" 

"Red dress with a split skirt?" The clerk glanced around nervously. 

That sounded like one of Terra's outfits. "Probably...eh?" 

She placed two manicured hands on my shoulders. "Five hundred gold pieces," she whispered. 

"What?" 

"Come on," she hissed. "Do you want to know about her or not?" 

She glanced toward the back room again, and I finally understood. _An under-the-table deal, eh?_ "All right." 

She beamed. "Thank you, sir," she said in a much louder voice. "Come, I'll walk you to the door." 

She took me by the elbow and led me to the exit. When I stepped outside, she remained in the doorway, and held out one hand expectantly. I sighed, and gave her the agreed-upon sum. 

She pocketed the money and smirked. "Your friend paid us a visit recently--bought a nice diamond vest." She sighed. "I wish I'd gotten that commission." _As I suspected._ "She seemed pretty angry about something." 

"Really?" That seemed familiar, somehow. But surely Terra couldn't still be that angry over last night. She'd left me the Striker, hadn't she? "When was this?" 

The clerk smiled widely, even as she stepped back. "Yesterday." 

The door slammed in my face.

* * *

The sun was hot. 

The sun was simmering. 

The sun had company. 

That's not to suggest that I was considering going back to the weapons shop, or that I was imagining teaching that miserable con artist a lesson. No, I wasn't dreaming of using the Striker to knit her guts into a vest, or using the Blossom to give her a face like Setzer's, or-- 

Well. I might have been, had I not been concentrating every ounce of willpower I possessed on placing one foot in front of the other. Nothing else. Not the bells of returning ships, not the scent of roasted fish wafting through the air, not the... 

My stomach rumbled, and I came to a stop. 

Food. Yes, food was just the thing. Food would help me take my mind off of that conniving thief, and how I'd love to shove the Striker halfway up her-- 

I shook my head briefly, then pivoted on my heel and set off in the direction of the fish. 

It wasn't fifty steps later that the fishmonger came into view...and into earshot. I was still too far away to make out the words, but the woman behind the gleaming white cart was waving her arms in the air and bellowing at the top of her lungs. If there was an argument here, the man in front of her had surrendered long ago; he was no longer making the slightest show of resistance, only flinching each time she raised her voice. 

This did not satisfy her, though, and as I came closer, she exploded. "SO WHERE IN KEFKA'S TEN HELLS DO YOU GET OFF TELLING ME I CAN'T COOK?!" 

The man whimpered. 

"WELL?" 

I reached the cart. "Um...excuse me..." 

"WHAT DO YOU WANT?" she roared, whipping around to face me. 

"Eep!" I jumped back. 

She blinked. "Oh, sorry. Excuse me a second." Her face hardened as she turned back to the other man... "GET OUT AND--hm?" 

...where the other man had been, at any rate. He had taken advantage of my distraction; even as we watched, he ducked around a distant corner and disappeared from sight. 

The fishmonger sighed in disgust, then turned back to me. "Anyway, what can I do for you?" 

My stomach rumbled, and I felt my face heat. "Um--" 

Her face lit up. "Oh, a customer! Here, I've got just the thing." Before I could say a word, she ducked behind the cart, and came out with a smoking..._something_ on a stick. She shoved it into my hand, then looked at me expectantly. 

"Um, thank you." I bit into the...whatever it was--and my eyes went wide. 

"Eighty gold pieces, please." 

MY MOUTH WAS ON FIRE! 

"Um..." 

The hot sun beating down on my head had nothing on the scalding _thing_ burning away my tongue. 

"Hello?" 

_Pain! PAIN!_ I staggered forward, grabbing the cart to stay upright. 

"Money, please?" 

In desperation, I turned away and spat the...spat _it_ out, then fell to my hands and knees, gasping for breath. 

"Hey! Are you deaf?" 

I looked up at her and glared. "What the hell was that?!" 

She gave me a look that clearly questioned my intelligence, if not my sanity. "A fish. Now, about my money..." 

"Fish?" That was _fish?_ "Are you sure you didn't give me some charcoal on a stick, by mistake?" 

Everything went quiet. A passing cloud covered the sun, and in the dimmer light, the fishmonger's eyes had narrowed. "And just _what,_" she said in a calm voice, "is that supposed to mean?" 

Uh-oh. 

"Are you suggesting I can't cook?" 

_Oh shit._ "I'm--" 

"You stand there, eating my fish, _without even paying for it,_ and you have the--the gall to say I CAN'T COOK?!" 

_I never asked for this, did I?_ With an effort, I kept my already-frayed temper in check. "In my opinion--" 

"OPINION?!" Poor word choice, on my part. "You can have an opinion AFTER you pay me, AND NOT A SECOND SOONER!" 

"Hey!" I snapped. I had had enough. "I never said I wanted--" 

"WHO CARES WHAT YOU WANT?! GIVE ME MY MONEY! _NOW!_" 

I felt the Striker's reassuring grip against my palm. _She's leading with her right shoulder. If I can land a cut there..._

The fishmonger towered over me. "YOU HAVE UNTIL THE COUNT OF...of..." 

Wait a minute. The Striker? 

I blinked, and the red haze drained away. I found myself pivoted to the side, ready to lash out with my right hand. 

With the Striker. 

Slowly, deliberately, I released my grip on the knife, and brought my hand up to my face. _I just--I nearly--_

I looked up, into the frightened eyes of the fishmonger. 

She knew it too. 

I turned, and fled.

* * *

In retrospect, running might not have been the brightest thing I could have done. I needed to get away, true, but this was the first day back on my feet. I wasn't in the greatest of shapes to begin with, World's End tonics notwithstanding. (It also may have prompted the cries of "THIEF!" coming from the fishmonger's direction, but that was only a secondary concern.) 

_I can't take much more of this._

My lungs were on fire, and my side ached. Finally, I had no choice but to stagger to a halt, leaning heavily against a nearby building and doing my level best not to sink to my knees. 

I wasn't sure I would be able to rise again, if I did. 

"Are you all right?" 

I whipped around with a startled cry. Unfortunately, my feet got tangled up in each other, and I collapsed in an inglorious heap. I looked up to see a young woman looking down on me with concern in her eyes. She reached down to me. "Are you okay?" 

_"Leave me alone!"_ I slapped away her hand. 

"Ah!" She jerked back, and her eyes widened momentarily. "I'm...I'm sorry, I just..." 

Guilt washed over me. What had she been doing, but trying to help? "No, I'm sorry." I clambered to my feet, rubbing my sore backside. "I'm not feeling..." _As if that's an excuse._ "I'm not myself." 

"I see." She looked at me for a moment, then nodded. "You should sit down for a minute. Here, come inside." 

I noticed the apron she wore. Was she working? "I don't want to bother you...." 

"Nonsense!" She took my wrist in an insistent grip. "Come, come." 

The interior of the building was dark, but not as dark as World's End; there were a couple of dim lamps, and a few rays of sunlight snuck through the shaded windows. My eyes quickly grew accustomed to the lighting, and I began to make out a number of dresses, shirts, pants, and vests hanging from the walls. "A tailor's?" 

She turned to me, blinking in surprise. "You mean you don't remember?" 

"What do you mean?" 

"Those clothes." She gestured towards me. "I made them." 

"Oh." 

She cocked her head. "You really don't recognize this place?" 

"No, I wasn't the one who bought these." 

"Are you sure?" She pushed me gently into a chair in the corner. "Those fit you very well, and they haven't been altered." 

I smiled. "The person that bought them was one hell of a guesser." 

"Guesser...oh! Miss Branford! So you're the one she was shopping for!" 

"Branford?" Was she confusing Terra with someone else? "Green hair?" 

"And eyes." She looked at me in surprise. "You didn't know her last name?" 

"No." _Terra Branford, eh?_ She hadn't mentioned that. But then, Terra hadn't mentioned _my_ last name, either. Was that because she didn't know? 

_Shadow....Who names their son "Shadow?"_

I shook my head. "Actually, I'm looking for her. Have you seen her?" 

She smiled. "As a matter of fact, I have. She stopped in early this morning to order a dress." 

I blinked. "A dress?" 

She gestured to the far wall. A brilliant sky-blue dress caught my eye. "She asked us to split the skirt on that one. It should be ready next week." 

"I see." Little chance she'd come back today, then. "Did she say where she was going after that?" 

"No, I'm sorry." 

"It's all right." I stood and stretched my arms. "Thank you for your time. I really appreciate it." 

"Not at all." She smiled. "Come back whenever you like. Any friend of Terra Branford is a friend of mine." 

_Friend._ It seemed like a long time since I'd heard that word. "Thank you. I..." I trailed off as the hangings by the door caught my eye. "Are those masks?" 

The seamstress blinked. "Yes, they are. Are you interested in one?" 

Hmm. Locke said I wore a mask.... "Maybe. Can I try one on?" 

"I don't see why not." She glided across the floor to the rack, and returned with a leather strip. "Here." 

Even as I pulled the eye-mask across my face, I knew this wasn't it. "This doesn't feel right." If they couldn't recognize me without my mask... "Do you have anything that covers the entire face?" 

"Let me see." She closed her eyes for a minute, and tapped her lower lip. "I think I have a couple. Do you want one that you strap on, or a hood?" 

Which would be more likely to hide my identity? "Let's try the hood." 

"All right." She took the eye-mask from me, and a moment later replaced it with a dark shroud. "Here you are. The eyes are--" 

"I see them." To my surprise, I did. This hood had a firm frame, plated in brass (or was that gold?) around the crown of the head. The eye holes weren't actually holes--instead, a thin blue mesh veil was actually stitched into the mask. 

I held the hood out before me a moment. I took a breath, then plunged headfirst into the blackness. 

I opened my eyes, and couldn't help but let out a startled gasp. This thin film stretched before my eyes did almost nothing to hinder my vision--indeed, it would effectively conceal where I was looking without blurring what I was looking at. It felt...it felt _right._

"Oh, my!" I glanced at the seamstress, remembering at the last second to turn my head so she would know. "It fits you very well! Here, let me take you to a mirror." 

I let myself be dragged across the shop. _Finally, I'm getting somewhere!_ I wondered whether Terra would have let me try on the mask, had she been with me--then, we were in front of the mirror, and the visage staring back at me drove the breath from my lungs. 

The veil did not hide my eyes as I had thought. It highlighted them. If anything, they were even more sinister than I'd judged them the first time I looked in a mirror. No, not more sinister--more _suitable._ This was the face of Shadow, I realized with a start; these veiled eyes the only feature visible as he lashed out with the Striker--the last thing one would see, if he struck true...if _I_ struck true. 

For the first time, I began to understand just why my name could hold such sway. 

I took a deep breath... 

_-flicker-_

"The Reaper is always a step behind me." 

_-flicker-_

...and gagged, as a sickly sweet fragrance that hadn't been there a second before filled my nostrils. _What..._

"Sir?" 

_I know this smell. It's..._

_Blood!_ Suddenly, I could not get the mask off of me quickly enough. _It smells like blood!_ I clawed at the edges, nearly tearing the fabric in my haste. _Get it away from me!_

"Sir! Are you all right?" 

As I felt the cooler air hit my eyelids, I drew in a deep breath, then exhaled with a relieved sigh. The scent was gone. "I...I'm fine. Just give me a minute." _What_ was _that?_

The seamstress looked at me worriedly. "All right." She touched my wrist. "Do you want me to put the mask back?" 

I glanced down at the fabric in my hands, and barely kept a wince off my face. "No....No, I'll take it." Whatever it was, it was a clue to my past--and I was in sore need of those, however unsavory. "How much?" 

"Fifteen hundred." 

I numbly handed over the money, then turned to the door. 

The seamstress was there before me. She opened the door, letting in a flood of crimson light, then turned toward me, a silhouette in the setting sun. "Thank you very much for your patronage. I hope you feel better soon." 

"Yeah. Me too." 

"Give my best regards to Miss Branford when you see her, Mr...." She paused. "Oh, my! I just realized--Miss Branford never gave me your name." 

_Hi, my name is Shadow. Yes, _that_ Shadow. Want to be friends?_ I closed my eyes and took another deep breath. "No. She didn't." 

Without another word, I squeezed past her and stumbled towards the blood-red horizon.

* * *

The inn was a welcome sight for my exhausted eyes. It had only been a few hours since I left it, but it felt like much longer. My feet were sore, my side ached, and I wanted nothing more than to drop into bed and not move for the next week. 

Spotting Terra's distinctive hair through a ground floor window was just an added bonus. I redoubled my strides. Nothing was going to keep me from getting some answers now. 

A man fell face-first to the ground in front of me. "Ooh...help..." 

Well, almost nothing. 

I knelt down and rolled him onto his back. "Hey! Are you all right?" 

"Yeah. I think so." He spat out a mouthful of gravel. "Just give me a sec..." He clutched his chest as his body spasmed with a painful cough. 

That decided me. I grabbed his wrist and hauled him over my shoulder, much as Terra had done for me a couple of weeks earlier. "Here, let me get you inside." 

"Inside?" He looked up, then began to struggle as I stepped toward the inn. "No! Not there! Not that inn! The innkeeper--" Whatever the innkeeper was (and I'd certainly have believed just about anything about him) was lost in a coughing fit, but his struggles were wearing on my already drained endurance. His body began to slip, and he grabbed my wrist tightly. 

"All right, then. Let's at least get you to some shade, okay?" I took his silence for affirmation, and struggled into the alley next to the inn. 

I set him against the wall, and he slid down in a boneless heap. He retained his vise-like grip of my wrist, however, and held on even more tightly when I tried to pry his fingers loose. "Hey." I bent down. He seemed to be breathing easier. "Are you feeleing better? I--" His eyes flashed open. He grabbed my chin in his free hand and spun around, slamming me face-first into the wall. "Yaagh!" 

"Much better, thank you." 

I struggled to my feet, but before I could speak, he was there, and I felt a searing pain in my left side. I tried to scream, but he covered my mouth with one hand. _He stabbed me!_

"Nothing personal, you understand," the man continued as he twisted the knife, driving it deeper into my torso. "I don't usually take sick men, but thirty thousand gold pieces is thirty thousand gold pieces." I pressed weakly against the wall, and he chuckled. "You like it? My own special paralysis agent. Another thirty seconds and you won't be able to move at all." He paused. "Not that anyone will be looking for that when your throat's been cut and your money's gone. Now, then..." He gripped the knife in my side, and braced to pull it out. 

_Twenty seconds..._ A light flashed on in my mind, and once again my instincts took over. I thrust my left elbow down over his, locking his arm, then pivoted on my left foot, slamming him back against the wall--and driving my right elbow into his solar plexus. He gasped for breath, and his knife fell to the ground as I staggered free. 

_Ten seconds! Now's your chance!_

In one smooth motion, I spun back the way I'd come, knife flying out of its sheath and slicing across his belly. It was only as I came back around to face him again that I realized--I'd attacked with my right hand. 

_The Striker._

We stood there motionless for a few seconds. My attacker slid down the wall, truly limp this time, eyes widened in disbelief. His skin had begun to take on an unhealthy blue tint. "How..." 

A few seconds later, I fell to my knees. I felt an incredible weight in my wrists and head; it was all I could do to stay upright. The Striker slid from my nerveless fingers and struck the ground with a clatter. 

"No! That knife!" My attacker stared at me in horror, and I stared back. Before my eyes, his face began to swell. "You...you're..." His voice faded, and his eyes glazed over. His skin was now nearly black. One last breath rattled through his lungs, and his body settled. Then, he was still. 

I stared numbly at the corpse, inertia struggling with nausea. 

"Oh dear God." 

I didn't realize my vision was beginning to blur until I tried to glance back to the alley's entrance. I could barely make out a figure, and the only thing that let me know just who stood before me was an indistinct green blur, tainted with almost obscene red highlights. "Terra?" 

"Shadow! What happened?!" 

I tried to gesture to the unseeing corpse beside me, but I could barely move my hand. "Eh. Told you...I needed...training..." With a monumental effort, I heaved myself around to face her, and I succeeded--but only at the cost of my balance. 

I didn't feel my body hit the ground, or hear my head crack against the cobblestones. My world simply turned sideways, and as my eyes closed I saw a pair of red boots hurrying toward me. 

**"SHADOW!!!"**

_MAIOREM HAC DILECTIONEM NEMO HABET   
UT ANIMAM SUAM QUIS PONAT PRO AMICIS SUIS_


	6. Chapter VI

**PRELIMINARIES:** None of this belongs to me. Final Fantasy VI, and all worlds, characters, etc. associated with it, are the property of Square-Einx. Square-Enix is not associated in any way, shape, or form with the creation of this story (a fact for which, I suspect, they would be profoundly grateful). I have made liberal usage of their characters and settings in this story; this was done without their knowledge or permission, and is technically an infringement of Square-Enix's copyright. As this story is, at the most pragmatic level, free promotion of the Final Fantasy franchise, it is hoped that they will regard this story (if at all) with a benign ignorance.

If you paid a wooden nickel for this story, not only have you been drastically overcharged, but whoever charged you has done so illegally, and I disavow any association with said individual(s).

All feedback is welcome, up to and including line-by-line critiques (provided they fit in my mailbox).

This story is archived in .txt and .htm format, along with my other works, at my website, The Codex Scribanus (see author profile). In the highly unlikely event that you wish to have a copy of this story for your own site's archives, you'll find distribution guidelines there.

Those interested in seeing status updates on my work (as well as story recommendations, seeing as my read-write ratio at last check was roughly 700:1) are urged to check out my LiveJournal (again, see author profile).

It's still early, but it should be noted that this is one of the most important chapters in the entire story (which accounts for some of the massive delay this time around). It is also the single most experimental piece I've ever written (which accounts for the rest); your indulgence is craved should comprehension be difficult. Concepts and language bastardized in this chapter were stolen lock, stock, and barrel from at least half a dozen authors, philosophers and other personalities; apologies to all parties.

Twenty-one gun salutes go, as always, to my beta readers, Kami and Shack, whose valiant efforts at damage control saved the rest of you considerable grief.

A one-fingered salute, on the other hand, goes to this site and its oh-so-_wonderful_ autoformatting, which forced me to waste a couple of hours trying to rewrite a perfectly good chapter I've already sweated far too much over for their amusement. Those interested in seeing the original, unaltered, **_PROPERLY PUNCTUATED_** Chapter VI are urged to visit my site. Grrr...

Now, sit back and either enjoy the ride, or (more likely) enjoy thinking of what you'll do to me at the end of it...

* * *

**_You again?_**

_(silence)_

**_I thought I told you before--this can't be rushed! Or do you _want_ it to look like Zozo?_**

_I...I don't understand._

**_Of COURSE you don't understand! I'm not finished yet. So go on. Off with you, now--wake up!_**

_(silence)_

**_(silence)_**

_...um..._

**_What...why are you still here?_**

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

**_LEAP OF FAITH_**

A Final Fantasy VI Fanfic

by

Lunaludus Scribex

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

**CHAPTER VI**

**_Wake up!_**

_(silence)_

**_Wake up!_**

_(silence)_

**_WAKE UP!_**

_(silence)_

**_Wake...damn it! Why isn't this working?_**

_I don't understand._

**_Ugh...didn't we just go over this? Why won't you just wake up already and let me work in peace?_**

_I'm...asleep?_

**_YES, you're asleep. And at an unnatural hour, too--I wasn't expecting you for another...Oh._**

_Hm?_

**_You got knocked out, didn't you?_**

_Um...sort of. More like I passed out..._

**_Passed out...oh no. Don't tell me you collapsed _again!_ Shadow, I swear--there are times when I think you don't want me to finish this._**

_Whoa, back up. You seem to know me, but who are you?_

**_That could be...awkward. I'm you...but at the same time, I'm not._**

_...Run that by me again?_

**_You wouldn't recall this--I haven't gotten around to that quarter yet--but we once learned that there are two selves: the self that observes, and the self that is observed. Every person is made up of these two selves._**

_Huh?_

**_Ugh. You'd think this would get easier after how many times I've...Well, to put it simply--I'm the observer, and you are the observed. Perceptions...memories...these are my domain._**

_Memories!_

**_Ah. _Now_ you understand._**

_You're recovering my memories?_

**_In a sense. That has to do with the training we received once._**

_Training?_

**_Well. As long as you're stuck here, you may as well help me out. Come--I'll show you._**

* * *

_What is this?_

**_I should be the one asking that question. Tell me, Shadow. What do you see?_**

_I see a...city._

**_What's left of one, you mean._**

_Er..._

**_No need to get flustered. You could hardly offend me--I'm you, remember? And yes, this was once a great city. I built it, stone by stone. It was our crowning acheivement._**

_I still don't understand._

**_You will. Come, follow me._**

_Where are we going?_

**_Not far. Just down the road. Is there anything in particular you've been wondering about your past?_**

_Well...my name._

**_Your name?_**

_Yes. What kind of a name is Shadow, anyway?_

**_Ah, yes. I recall you asking me that once before. You're in luck--here we are. Tell me, does this building look at all familiar?_**

_No, it doesn't. I don't...I don't understand._

**_Can you remember how we got here?_**

_Yes. Yes, I think so._

**_Good. Then open the door._**

_What's inside?_

**_You'll see._**

* * *

**-FLASH-**

"YES!"

"Shh!" I waved him down by reflex, but there was no real heat behind it. I had a huge smile on my face, and my laughter rippled through my lungs, barely suppressed.

_What the..._

**_Quiet. Watch._**

Baram lowered his voice...a little, anway. "Can you believe this? A million gold pieces! I've never seen this much money in my life!"

"This is great! That's enough to set us both up for life!"

_I don't understand._

**_What do you see?_**

_I see a forest. I'm carrying something really heavy--wait a minute. **I'M** carrying something?_

Baram didn't answer. I glanced over, and realized he'd stopped some ten paces back. "Baram?"

_This is a memory!_

**_Yes, this is a memory._**

_This is incredible! I--_

**_Shadow._**

_Hmm?_

**_Shut up. Listen, and learn._**

"I don't want to stop."

I smiled. Same old Baram. Eyes fixed on the stars to the very end, even now that... "You _what?_"

"I don't want to give this up." Baram dropped his sack at his feet. It made a satisfying _clink_ as it landed. "We've just hit our stride--do you really mean to tell me you didn't enjoy that?"

I felt a smile tug at my face.

"You see? You don't want to quit either!"

"That's not the point, Baram." I dropped my own sack next to his.

_Oh, my aching back..._

**_Out of shape, were you?_**

_Just a little. How heavy_ is _that thing, anyway?_

**_How much do you think half a million gold pieces would weigh?_**

"We both agreed that once we made a hundred thousand gold pieces, we'd split. We've got ten times that right here!" I grabbed his shoulders. "Yes, I enjoyed it when it went well. But I remember what happened when it didn't!"

He calmly took hold of my wrists and removed my hands from his shoulders. "We're still alive, aren't we?"

"We're still...I can't believe I'm standing here having this conversation! I don't know about you, Baram, but I'm taking my share of the money and retiring to Jidoor, like we always said we would--remember?"

Baram shook his head. "You really don't get it, do you? Jidoor's the first place Doma will look!"

"Figaro, then, or Narshe. Hell, maybe I'll get on a boat and move to Maranda!"

_The air is pretty muggy for how we're dressed. Was this during the summer, or...?_

**_An autumn hot spell, I believe._**

_Are all my memories this...this vivid?_

**_Yes. You get used to it after a while. Now pay attention._**

_I am._

**_To the _conversation.**

"You do know what they'll do if they ever catch us, don't you?"

"Yeah. The Four Chocobos." I shuddered; there were far better ways to die. "That's why we agreed to get out now, before they got serious. What's your point?"

"My point is that it's already too late." He nudged the bags with one foot. "We've hit them hard enough that they'll _never_ stop hunting. It doesn't matter how far we run, or how long it takes. _They will find us._"

My blood ran cold. "So what are you suggesting?"

He smiled. "We give them someone else to chase."

"I don't follow."

_I'm not the only one._

**_Hush._**

"We've learned quite a bit about the Phantom Forest, haven't we?" Baram gestured at the trees around us. "I say we take what we've learned, and start a gang."

"A gang?" I winced. I'd seen plenty of gangs back in my Zozo days, and had been...less than impressed, as had Baram. We decided early on that almost anything ten people could do, two could do in half the time--with a fifth of the fuss. "How many people are we talking about, here?"

"As many as we can get! We'll use the prestige from this last job as a springboard to recruit. The _gang_ gets the reputation--and eventually, we retire, while Doma keeps chasing our successors." Baram was really getting into this, now. "We can build our own base here. No one will ever find it! Weapons, armor, food...we can stockpile everything a train robber would ever need."

_TRAIN ROBBER!_

I frowned. "You mean we use this money as capital."

"Exactly. We buy weapons, uniforms--masks. Pretty soon, the gang will be doing so much damage, Doma will forget all about _us._"

"And when we leave, they'll never know the difference." I pictured myself sitting at the opera house south of Jidoor. It was an attractive picture. "I like it."

He nodded. "All we need now is a name."

"It should be something to strike fear into their hearts." I rubbed my chin. "Let's see. We strike fast, without mercy and without warning. They'll never know where we'll be coming from...they'll never see us until it's too late."

"And afterward, we just melt back into the..." Baram clapped his hands. "That's it! Shadow!"

I blinked. "The great train robbers of the century: Shadow." It was as if something clicked in my mind; the name felt...right, as nothing had for a very long time.

Baram must have read my expression. He smiled. "Shadow it is?"

I returned a smile of my own. "Shadow it is."

**-FLASH-**

* * *

_(silence)_

**_Shadow?_**

_I...I can't believe it. I was a train robber?_

**_For a time._**

_For a time? What happened?_

**_I'm still not sure. In your later memories, the gang is gone. You're all that's left, and "Shadow" has become your name. Do you understand now, though? What I'm doing here?_**

_I...I think so. These buildings...they're all memories, aren't they?_

**_A city of memories. Everything you ever knew, everything you ever learned--it was all mapped, laid out, organized. When you were trapped in Kefka's tower...well, you can see what happened._**

_It looks like an earthquake hit._

**_That's one way to put it. I've been doing my best to rebuild, but there's still a long way to go._**

_I don't understand._

**_Look to the center, Shadow. What do you see?_**

_The center? I see--_

**_Those are the outskirts._**

_...oh. Um...What the hell?_

**_What do you see, Shadow?_**

_I...they look like towers, but..._

**_But what?_**

_They feel...those things shouldn't be there._

**_You're right._**

_What?_

**_They shouldn't be there. But they are._**

_What are they?_

**_I don't know. Every time I get close, they repel me--violently._**

_Couldn't you just avoid them?_

**_There are some very important buildings in the center of this city, Shadow. What's more...those things offend me._**

_Offend you?_

**_I am the master of this city. I built every building and paved every street; I know them all by heart. I had _never_ seen those things before Kefka's tower, and I want to know why. That's where you come in._**

_Huh?_

**_I didn't build those towers, and I think that's why they rejected me. They wouldn't necessarily reject you, though, and that should help me get through._**

_...I don't understand._

**_What did you do just now, Shadow?_**

_When I entered the building?_

**_Yes._**

_I experienced that memory, didn't I? I...I..._

**_Go on._**

_If those towers are buildings here, then they have to be memories, and...oh no._

**_Now you understand._**

_We're both there when you're recovering these memories, aren't we?_

**_You experience. I observe. And then, I rebuild._**

_...All these memories?_

**_Don't worry. It's only the ones that were destroyed that have to be rebuilt from scratch. There's enough left of you in the others that I can repair them without you, but those..._**

_...This city. It was built from the center out, wasn't it? That's why the towers are so important._

**_If we don't get those towers taken care of, you'll never get your most important memories back. And I can't get close enough to take care of them without being thrown back. That's why you have to climb them. Come._**

_(silence)_

**_Is something wrong?_**

_I'm...I've done this before?_

**_That's right._**

_Is...is it all right if we do another memory before the towers? One you haven't reclaimed yet?_

**_(silence)_**

_Just so I can get a feel for what we're doing._

**_...All right. There's one on our way that should help you get your feet wet._**

_Thank you._

**_Don't thank me yet._**

* * *

**-FLASH-**

"I'm the product of a human and an Esper." I paused at the voice, holding the door a second before it could close. "Will I ever be able to love someone?"

_What's going on? I don't understand._

**_Calm yourself, Shadow, and tell me what you see._**

_What I see? It's dark--the stars are out. I can see water...I'm on a boat!_

**_Good. What else?_**

I eased the door shut, then turned toward the prow.

_TERRA!_

Two people leaned side-by-side against the railing, staring out into the sea. One, somewhat to my surprise, was General Leo; the other was the Esper girl, Terra.

_Esper?_

**_I've never heard the term before._**

As I watched, Leo laughed. "Of course!"

Terra drooped at his laughter, and my breath caught in my throat. The way the moonlight caught her hair--she looked like--I ruthlessly clamped down on the thought. "But...I haven't felt that way yet..."

"You're just young." Leo shook his head. "But...I understand how you feel." Terra looked back at him, and his voice softened. "I understand only too well."

He placed a hand on her shoulder, and the two stared at one another for a heartbeat. Then Leo turned away and strode across the deck, toward the officers' cabin.

_I just realized something. I'm wearing a mask._

**_Ah, yes. You are, at that. How does it feel?_**

_I don't know. It's different from the shroud I just bought, but..._

Terra did not move from her spot, and for a long moment I looked back at the cramped cabin I'd just left. Finally, I shook my head, and cleared my throat.

Terra's head shot upright, and she spun around, hand going to her sword with a speed that would have put half the legions of Doma to shame. "Who's there?" I stepped out of the shadows, and Terra's hand dropped to her side. She didn't relax her stance, though. "You?"

"I thought I'd sleep out under the stars tonight." I hefted the bedroll under my right arm.

I stepped past her, but Terra grabbed my elbow, turning me to face her again. "You didn't...hear what we were talking about just now, did you?"

I looked away.

"You did."

I shrugged. "I didn't mean to overhear anything."

She sagged a little at that, though I couldn't tell whether it was relief or disappointment. I wasn't sure which would bother me more. "All right." She turned away.

"This is nothing unusual, you know." Terra paused and looked back at me, while I blinked and silently called myself ten kinds of idiot. What was I doing? Still, the words continued to pour out of my mouth. "Most people go through it at one point or another. It's normal."

"_Normal._" I blinked again, this time at the venom in her voice. "Normal people don't wear a Slave Crown for two years. Normal people have a childhood to remember. Normal people are _human._" She turned away from me, gripping the rails tightly. "I'm hardly...normal."

"As you like." I could not keep a trace of amusement out of my voice, and Terra stiffened. Before she could say anything, though, I went on in a more somber tone. "But for some people, not remembering would be a blessing."

She blinked. "What do you mean?"

"Have you ever been to Zozo?"

She flinched, which I didn't entirely understand. "Once."

That was a mystery to be unraveled later. "Once is usually enough." I turned to the sea, and we stood side-by-side, watching the waves. "Once upon a time, I grew up there."

I felt Terra's eyes upon me. "Shadow..."

"I didn't know who my family was--but that was a blessing in that hell-hole."

"I don't understand."

Neither did I. What was wrong with me tonight? "Life is cheap. I never knew my parents...but I had a partner, one who did--and he lived to regret it." My mouth tightened behind my mask. I didn't like talking about Baram; it led me toward things I had long ago decided not to think about.

_Baram? From the last memory?_

**_Looks like it._**

I shook my head and pressed on. "His parents were killed when he was...six, I think it was. They were long, torturous deaths--and he had to watch the entire thing from the closet where they had hidden him."

I did look over at Terra now. She had raised one hand to cover her mouth, her eyes wide with horror. My voice hardened as I continued. "But he survived. I survived. We prospered, for a time...even found love." I turned back to the ocean. "For a time."

_This is odd._

**_What?_**

_My thoughts--in the memory, I mean._

**_How so?_**

_My mind is empty. I'm literally thinking about nothing._

"Shadow..."

I forced myself to turn and face her. It was hard; the moonlight glinted off her diaphanous hair, bathing her in a soft blue glow. She could have been a spirit--and she looked far too much like someone I would never think about again for my comfort.

_I'm doing it again._

**_Odd._**

I caught and held her eyes. "I can't help you. No one can." I turned away, and crouched to open my bedroll. "The answers you're looking for must come from within." Now leave, I screamed in my mind.

For a moment, I thought she would do just that. Then, to my horror, her arms slid around my neck. "Thank you," she whispered into my ear.

I went rigid in her grasp. My joints locked as I fought the rising panic in my mind--fought to forget, and to remain still. Terra's arms fell away as I rose, my body on autopilot, struggling to restrain my impulses.

_This memory...it's right on the edge of the towers, isn't it?_

**_What was your first clue?_**

Finally, I succeeded. I took a deep breath, and opened my eyes. Terra stepped back at whatever she saw in them; I grabbed her shoulder, and she flinched. "Terra."

She stared back at me. It was the first time I'd ever used her name. "Be very careful," I continued, in as flat a voice as I could manage. "There are many people in this world who have killed their emotions." I stepped forward, and she shrank back--but her feet were rooted to the deck, held in place by my eyes and my firm grip. "People like me." I released her, and she stumbled back, losing her footing and falling to the deck. She looked up at me, and her gaze puzzled me. There was fear, as I had intended, and some sense of betrayal, as well--but there was something else, as well. I didn't think I wanted to find out what. "Remember that."

I turned away, and a moment later heard her footsteps trail across the deck. The cabin door opened, then closed with a soft _click._

I looked up at the stars and the moon. I wondered how long it would take me to fall asleep tonight.

**-FLASH-**

* * *

_...Whoa._

**_Are you all right?_**

_I...I think so. Can we rest? That was draining._

**_No hurry. You collapsed; we have plenty of time._**

_Time...How long did that take?_

**_Hard to say. Time flows differently here...but why don't you take a look at what we rebuilt?_**

_...HOLY--_

**_Impressive, no?_**

_That thing is a mansion! We rebuilt_ that?

**_Well, it's an important memory. It's close to the towers, you might have noticed._**

_I did. I wonder how much that had to do with the blank spots...?_

**_How so?_**

_They could be linked to the memories in the towers. I mean, you can't understand something if you haven't recovered the right memories, right?_

**_Not exactly. Certainly, I can't _understand_ everything until it's been linked up, but I _can_ construct a framework and try to deduce things--and that wouldn't affect how you saw the memory, at any rate._**

_Then it's not the towers?_

**_I didn't say that. An unrecovered memory would have been available--but not a buried memory._**

_What do you mean?_

**_We're close to the towers, now. Can you see their bases from here?_**

_I think so. I...What in Kefka's ten hells is_ that?

**_What do you see?_**

_There's a...a_ pit_ around the towers. It's wide, and it's deep._

**_What does that tell you?_**

_The towers are rising up out of the pit...Wait. Did they create it?_

**_Very good._**

_The earthquake...it was those towers rising up, wasn't it?_

**_You're missing the point. Where were they beforehand?_**

_Before? They must have been buried...under..._

**_Exactly. Those three memories were buried so deep that for all intents and purposes, they weren't there. You didn't think about those memories because you_ couldn't.**

_In other words..._

**_They were repressed._**

_Repressed...THE NIGHTMARES!_

**_Nightmares?_**

_I've been having trouble sleeping because of my dreams. The doctor said three traumatic memories were behind it...damn it, why didn't I see it before? Those things are the cause of everything!_

**_Oh dear._**

_..."Oh dear." I'm not going to like this, am I?_

**_Not particularly, no._**

_I'm going to have to enter the towers, aren't I?_

**_Yes._**

_...I've_ been_ entering the towers._

**_Yes._**

_Have we made _any_ progress?_

**_Not until the last time you were here._**

_Last...oh, the doctor._

**_Whatever he did, it worked wonders. You could barely describe anything, but you made it through the first tower._**

_The first?_

**_There's only one way into the towers, and it only lets you into one. You can't see that from here, but you _can_ see the ramps connecting the others. The only way into the second tower is the ramp from the first--and the only way into the third is the ramp from the second._**

_Yes...yes, you're right..._

**_What is it?_**

_The doctor talked about these memories settling back down into my subconscious. That's...not going to happen, is it?_

**_Probably not. To destroy them, we'd have to control them, first--and we've_ never _been able to control these memories._**

_Yeah...All right, let's give this a try._

* * *

**-FLASH-**

_What the..._

"...let you down...I'm sorry..."

_What is this?_

**_Shadow!_**

_Yes?_

**_You can hear me? Thank the goddesses! What's going on?_**

_I...I'm not sure. I--_gah!

**_Shadow! Talk to me!_**

_I...I don't...There's something in here!_

**_Something? What?_**

_I don't know. I can't see, I just--ah! It just went past my leg!_

**_You can't see? What about the memory?_**

_St...stay back!_

**_SHADOW!_**

What _memory? There's no--wait. What was that?_

**_What is what?_**

_I just saw a flash, a moment ago. It's--there it is again!_

**_Is it the same as--_**

_No, it's different. It's--there it is again! That's...wait, that's water!_

**_Water?_**

_No, wait. It's not just water, it's--_

"You're...coward!"

_What was that?_

**_Forget that, focus on the water! What else?_**

_(silence)_

**_Shadow!_**

_...It's coming._

**_What's--_**

_I...I can feel it coming! It's almost here!_

**_Forget about it, Shadow! What's with the water?_**

_It's water and--AAAAH!_

**_Shadow!_**

_No! Get away! You can't--NO!_

**_What's--oh no! It's waking you up! Shadow, get out of there NOW!_**

_How? WHERE?_

**_Go through! It should almost be done, just--_**

_There it--aagh!--is again!_

**_Get out! Hurry!_**

_No, wait, I saw it! I saw it this time! It was water and--aah!--and--_

**_Shadow!_**

"Clyde! How dare you!"

_--AND BLOOD!_

**-FLASH-**

* * *

**_Are you all right?_**

_I...I think so. Give me a second._

**_Take it. That was harder than I thought it would be._**

_How much did you get out of that?_

**_Water and blood. There wasn't enough for anything else._**

_Someone was talking. Do you know who...?_

**_There wasn't enough. I'm sorry._**

_Oh._

**_Don't worry about it too much. That was still more than we've managed to get from it before._**

_And we've tried it how many times, exactly?_

**_Quite a few. This is only the second time we've actually made it through the first tower, though._**

_Wonderful. I'll die of old age before we just make sense of this one._

**_I don't think it'll be that bad. Whatever the doctor did is working; we've made more progress the last two tries than the twenty before that._**

_Twenty?_

**_We've been trying to scale these towers ever since they first arose. These are the most important things for us._**

_I..guess that makes sense. Hey--why were you so surprised you could talk to me?_

**_The last time you went through, I couldn't._**

_(silence)_

**_And I could when you tried the second tower, which was really surprising to me._**

_I wonder what was different?_

**_I told you before, don't underestimate the doctor's work. It was progressing even as you were asleep._**

_Yeah..._

**_You really couldn't see anything in there?_**

_Pitch-black._

**_Huh. I wonder if that will improve with time, as well...?_**

_I_ hope _not._

**_Oh?_**

_I don't know what that was in there, but it was bad enough sensing it--no way do I want to see it!_

**_Well, we'll worry about that another day._**

_Yeah. Another day._

**_(silence)_**

_Say, could you tell me about the buildings that were here before?_

**_Before the towers, you mean?_**

_Yes. Were they all as majestic as the one we reclaimed before?_

**_I don't know about "majestic." They were all large, but their appearance depended on their function._**

_I don't follow._

**_It reflects the importance to you of the people in the memory._**

_So Terra is..._

**_Someone of great significance in your life before, yes._**

_Are there other buildings like that?_

**_Quite a few, but most of them were destroyed when the towers rose up. In fact, there was one...do you have a pet?_**

_A pet? Not that I know of. Why?_

**_You did, at some point. One of the buildings closest to the center was...well, it was essentially a giant doghouse._**

_...a doghouse._

**_Yes, a doghouse. I don't recall the memory that was in it, but the structure was bigger than the mansion._**

_A dog was that important to me? Why?_

**_I don't know. I've seen hints of his presence in other memories I've recovered, though. In fact, now that I think of it, if you were wearing a mask, the dog should have been in the mansion, as well._**

_Really? I wonder where he was?_

**_I'll check on it later._**

_All right._

**_(silence)_**

_(silence)_

**_Deep, isn't it?_**

_Yes. How many buildings were lost to this pit?_

**_Hmmm...I don't recall, exactly. This close to the center, it wasn't just buildings; there were protective structures in place, as well._**

_Protective structures? Why? Who would I have to defend my own mind against?_

**_The Empire._**

_Empire? I don't remember anything about an Empire._

**_It will come back to you eventually. The building's been recovered--it's just a matter of you learning how to find it again._**

_How am I supposed to do that when I'm awake?_

**_You're a resourceful man, Shadow. I'm sure you'll think of something._**

_You have no idea how_...reassuring _that is._

**_Well, enough of that for now. Take a look back at the first tower. See the plate over the door?_**

_Yes, I see it. It's...is that a chocobo?_

**_Yes. I was hoping you might have some idea as to what that might mean._**

_I'm not sure. It's saddled, but...sorry._

**_All right, no hurry. I get the feeling we'll be staring at that plate a lot. How about the other one?_**

_What other one?_

**_The one over the door to the second tower._**

_Ah. That's...a mask? I don't understand._

**_Well, there's only one way to find out, isn't there?_**

_(silence)_

**_Shadow? You okay?_**

_Do I...have to do this right now?_

**_The second tower?_**

_Yeah._

**_Well...you don't HAVE to, but..._**

_But?_

**_The only way back is the way you came._**

_The first tower again._

**_Right._**

_Ugh...I don't know if I can do that, either._

**_Two bad choices, huh? Well, you've got time to think. Relax._**

_Do I...I wonder..._

**_(silence)_**

_Hey._

**_Hm?_**

_Everything here is a memory, right?_

**_That's right._**

Everything?

**_Yes, but why--no. You're not serious._**

_I guess there's three choices, then, aren't there?_

**_No! You can't jump, it's too dangerous! Shadow, WAI--_**

**-FLASH-**

* * *

I fell through the darkness, tumbling end over end as the wind rushed around me. A great fear seized me; this was the end--I understood it now--and I did not want to die. 

But I could do nothing but fall, fall through the darkness with the scream that was ripped from my throat my only companion, waiting endlessly to hit a bottom I couldn't see--

"Stop that!"

...until I suddenly felt hot clammy fabric beneath me, hot clammy fabric over me, a painful bright cascade crashing over my eyelids, diluting the darkness and at the same time making me aware that my eyes were closed.

It wasn't easy...but it _was_ familiar. I groaned as the bright sun assaulted my eyes, squinting and flinching away.

"Hey, now."

A shadow suddenly blocked the sun. I blinked, slowly making out a small, stocky silhouette. _The doctor._ He rested a cool hand on my forehead. "Are you awake, boy?"

I raised an eyebrow, and he chuckled. "Right. Stupid question." He moved back a few steps, still keeping himself between me and the sun. "Can you sit up?"

"I think so." I pushed myself up on my elbows and shuffled back against the wall, using it as a brace to force myself upright. The sun resumed its attack from this new angle, and I shielded my eyes with one hand. "Where..."

"Your room. Your lovely nurse carried you up here, then sent for me." He glared at me. "You gave her a real scare, you know. We weren't sure you were going to make it."

I winced. "Sorry."

"I'm not the one you should be apologizing to." He clapped me lightly on the shoulder. "Well, no harm done. You're alive, and that's what's important." He laid two fingers across my throat, and his voice turned curious. "What happened to you, though?"

"Huh?"

"Your energy, boy. It's been completely restructured."

I blinked. "Wasn't that the idea?"

"Pshaw! In a month or two, maybe! But this?" He waved his pipe in the air for emphasis. "You get stabbed in the side, infected with some kind of poison--I'm still not sure what--nearly die--_again_--and come out of it progressing ten times faster than you should have in the best of circumstances? It's not possible!" He bit down on the pipe so hard that I heard the wood crack. He spat out the end, and glared at me. "What in the world _are_ you?"

I drew back. "I...well..."

At that moment, the door opened. "Doctor, I brought some wet cloths and--" Terra stopped dead and gaped at me.

She looked tired, I thought absently as I regarded her in turn, even though she fought hard not to show it. There was no sag in her posture, and her clothing--a bright blue dress with a split skirt that tickled the edges of my memory--swirled about her with a lively fervor. Her face was drawn, though, and her eyes--!

The doctor said I'd given her a scare, but I didn't really understand until then. Even as I watched, a heavy weight seemed to slide from her shoulders and her eyes began to water.

"Um...hi." I waved tentatively. "I--_oof!_"

I barely saw her cross the room, a sky-colored blur that crashed into my chest and resolved into my sobbing friend.

_Wait...friend?_

"Shadow! Oh, thank the goddesses!" My eyes flicked to the doctor; he watched me without a trace of surprise. _He knew...?_

Terra glared at me through her tears. "Don't you _ever_ do that to me again!" She glanced over at the doctor. "How long has he been up?"

"Just a couple of minutes." He shook his head. "It surprised me, too."

"Wait a minute." I pushed Terra back and sat up a little straighter. "What's going on?"

"Shadow..." Terra glanced down, and realization finally struck. _That dress--the seamstress! But she said..._ "You've been asleep for ten days."

I sucked in a sharp breath. "Ten days..."

At that moment, the doctor hopped back on the bed and cocked his head toward the window. "Am I the only one hearing that?"

"Hearing wh--" I broke off as I realized what he was talking about. It was still faint, and hard to hear over the ocean, but there was a rumbling sound, growing steadily louder.

"That's..." Terra rushed to the window, and laughed. "It is! The _Falcon_!"

She turned back to us, and I felt a pang of guilt at the relief in her eyes and smile. "They're back!"

* * *

I gazed at the open doorway. 

The sun had struck Terra's hair as she flew out of the room, sending a bright flash my way that lingered long after she was gone. It was familiar somehow, but...

"Something on your mind, boy?"

I started. I'd forgotten the doctor was still in the room. "I...I haven't been a very good patient, have I?"

"No, you haven't." I sighed, and the doctor chuckled. "But from what she's told me, you've _never_ been a good patient--why should a little thing like amnesia change that now?"

I looked at the doorway again. "How long has she...?"

He rubbed his chin. "Can't say for sure--I've been stopping by to check you every so often, but after the first day you were more or less out of danger. At a rough guess, though, she's slept less these ten days than you did the week before that."

"Oh."

Neither of us said anything for the next few minutes. The rumbling stopped abruptly, and I glanced over at the window. The _Falcon_ must have landed.

"So...you knew."

The doctor looked at me for a long moment, then nodded.

"How long...?"

"Since I first examined you." My jaw dropped, and he laughed. "Come on, boy, I'm not blind! I follow what happens in this world, and you and your friends have been at the center of most of it for the last two years. Even if I didn't recognize your lovely green-haired nurse--or your crabby blond nurse, for that matter--" I chuckled involuntarily, and he winked at me. "--there's only one airship left in this world, and only a few people who ride on it. It wasn't too hard to guess."

"But if you knew, then..."

"Why?"

I nodded.

He sighed, and gave me a solemn look. "I won't pretend I approve of what you do, boy. But I took an oath, long ago." He closed his eyes and breathed deeply. "I swore to do no harm, and to turn away none who sought my help. If he'd come to me, I would have patched up Kefka himself." He flashed a crooked grin. "Mind you, I can't think of a scenario where he'd have needed _my_ help, but..."

I nodded in understanding. Then, the first thing he'd said registered. "Wait. What I do? What's--"

At that moment, we heard the innkeeper call out a greeting from the still open doorway. A few seconds later, Terra answered.

"That sounds like my cue to book." The doctor hopped onto the window sill. "Later, boy! Look me up before you leave town!"

"Look you up...no, wait--!" It was too late; he'd already disappeared. "How does he do that?"

I started as a loud _crash_ echoed throughout the inn. A moment later, a cacophany of voices sprang to life below.

"Grab him!" Terra shouted.

An unearthly growl reverberated through the inn, and Locke's voice echoed up a half second later. "What are you looking at _me_ for?"

"Oh, fucking hell," came an unfamiliar woman's voice. "Interceptor, NO!"

_Interceptor...?_

That started everyone shouting again. I heard another _crash_, and then the innkeeper joined the angry chorus. The growls cut off abruptly...and Setzer's voice jumped three octaves.

"_Relm!_" Celes bellowed over Locke's laughter.

"Sorry," the unfamiliar woman said, not sounding all that penitent. "It's the smell in here. Okay, Interceptor, let go. Come on...just because it's never been used doesn't mean you can...good boy."

"Oh, very--ow!--funny. See if I ever help you again, you flat chested, dog-fucking little b--"

"_Setzer!_"

"Now see here! Either control that thing, or get the hell out of my inn!"

"I can control him just fine," Relm snapped. "It's not my fault you shit in the mugs before you open up in the morning!"

"Watch your mouth, girl, or I'll wash it out with soap."

"Soap? Here?"

"...Interceptor?"

The room suddenly grew quiet at Terra's query. When Relm next spoke, her voice was low, almost afraid to break the silence. "What is it, boy? You smell something besides this crap they're serving?"

"Terra?" Celes asked quietly. "Is he still in the same room?"

"Yes, he's...wait. You don't think Interceptor--" She broke off at the sound of excited yelping. "Oh, great!"

"Interceptor, _NO!_"

There was a loud pounding on the stairs, and the yelps got louder. I barely had time to sit upright before a huge black shape shot through the open door, slamming into my chest and knocking me back onto my back. I could only gaze up in amazement as it threw back its head and howled in triumph.

It was a dog--a huge, black dog with brown streaks and rows of sharp teeth that glinted in the sunlight.

I stared. This was an animal to strike fear into anyone--big, aggressive, and very, very dangerous. But I felt no fear at all, not the least bit of worry. I actually felt comfortable; the dog's presence was familiar, as if--

It finally clicked. "You're...Interceptor?" The dog let out a chest-rattling bark and licked my face. "Ack! Hey!"

"God _damn_ it, Interceptor!" Footsteps pounded down the hallway to my door, and I turned to look. "Get your flea-bitten, goat-fucking ass back here! I oughtta--oh, hi. Shadow, right? You really do look different without that shitty black rag around your face."

I stared, jaw dropping.

I knew who this was, who this had to be. She was much as Terra had described her--young, just beginning to grow into a woman. Her clothes--a pair of extremely tight slacks, a golden sash draped around her waist, and a blouse that ended at her armpits--and stance--hand on her hip, head cocked--both spoke of reckless arrogance. A few curls of blond hair trickled out from under her beret, and she looked at me with faint amusement. It was the expression that held me.

Terra had said nothing about her having hazel eyes.

"You're..."

"Relm Arrowny." Interceptor hopped off the bed and trotted over to her.

I couldn't look away from her eyes. A bead of sweat trickled down the side of my face, and a sudden chill raced down my spine. "Relm...you're..."

"You."

Relm started and spun around, stepping away from the doorway and the crowd that had gathered just outside. There was Terra, and Celes, and Locke, and Setzer--and in front of them all was a squat old man, dressed in leathers, glaring at me with undisguised hatred.

Terra laid a hand on his shoulder. "Strago...?"

"_You._"

I blinked. "What--_ack!_"

Before anyone could stop him, he sprinted across the room, barreled into me and knocked me off the bed, tumbling with me to the ground.

"_You!_" His hands wrapped around my throat, and he slammed my head back against the floor.

"YOU!" _-thud-_ "YOU BLACK HEARTED--" _-thud-_ "--MURDERING--" _-thud-_ "--**_SON OF A BITCH!_**"

The frantic shouting drifted away, and the spots gathering in my eyes finally blotted out his murderous gaze. This, I decided as I faded from consciousness, was not good.

_MAIOREM HAC DILECTIONEM NEMO HABET   
UT ANIMAM SUAM QUIS PONAT PRO AMICIS SUIS_


	7. Chapter VII

**PRELIMINARIES:** None of this belongs to me. Final Fantasy VI, and all worlds, characters, etc. associated with it, are the property of Square-Enix. Square-Enix is not affiliated in any way, shape, or form with the creation of this story (a fact for which, I suspect, they would be profoundly grateful). I have made liberal usage of their characters and settings in this story; this was done without their knowledge or permission, and is technically an infringement of Square-Enix's copyright. As this story is, at the most pragmatic level, free promotion of the Final Fantasy franchise, it is hoped that they will regard this story (if at all) with a benign ignorance.

If you paid a wooden nickel for this story, not only have you been drastically overcharged, but whoever charged you has done so illegally, and I disavow any association with said individual(s).

All feedback is welcome, up to and including line-by-line critiques (provided they fit in my mailbox).

This story is archived in .txt and .htm format, along with my other works, at my website, The Codex Scribanus (see author profile). In the highly unlikely event that you wish to have a copy of this story for your own site's archives, you'll find distribution guidelines there.

Those interested in seeing status updates on my work (as well as story recommendations, seeing as my read-write ratio at last check was roughly 700:1) are urged to check out my LiveJournal (again, see author profile).

Much gratitude is owed, as always, to my masochists on retainer--er, that is, my _prereaders_, Kami and Shack, who, after thanking me and asking for another, graciously suggested enough improvements to render this chapter a merely painful experience, rather than an intolerable one.

Now, sit back and either enjoy the ride, or (more likely) enjoy thinking of what you'll do to me at the end of it...

* * *

_But then, why would this Strago attack me?_

_**I don't know. There's nothing from the memories I've recovered suggesting anything like that. It's possible there's something I just haven't gotten to yet, but...**_

"Woof!"

_What was that?_

_**I don't know. It's--**_

"Woof!"

_**Ah.**_

_Ah?_

_**It would appear our time here is at an end. Someone is trying to awaken you.**_

"Woof!"

_How do I wake up?_

_**Just go with it. You'll know what to do.**_

"WOOF!"

_Wait--will I remember any of--_

**"WOOF!"**

I came to with a start, panicked for half a second by the heavy weight on my chest. That passed, though, replaced with that same unnatural calm when I identified the tongue bathing my cheek as belonging to the dog I'd somehow recognized as Interceptor.

I slowly opened my eyes and sat up, gently pushing him to one side. I wrinkled my nose as I caught a whiff of myself--I would need to stop by the baths, and soon.

I absently scratched behind Interceptor's ears as I looked around. The room was empty, the door closed; silence permeated the air. I glanced down at Interceptor, who'd laid his head on my thigh. "It looks like they left us alone, eh?"

Interceptor looked up at me with a plaintive whine.

I laughed. "No, I'm not complaining. I like them--" An image of Setzer flashed before my eyes, followed by one of the old man Terra had called "Strago." "--well, most of them. But this is nice; it feels...right. You understand, right?"

Interceptor looked up at me, then clambered over my lap to the other side, laid his head on his paws, and closed his eyes.

I chuckled. "Good idea," I said as I sat back against the wall, tilted my head up, and closed my eyes--

_**Slam!**_

My head came down, and my eyes snapped open; I whipped around to the door, where--"Relm?"

Interceptor's mistress slumped exhausted, her back plastered to the door. Her chest heaved with labored, frantic breaths, and her wide eyes stared blankly ahead.

"Relm?"

She stared on, unseeing and unresponsive.

I called her name a third time, again without a reaction. It did catch Interceptor's attention, though. His ears perked up, and he bounded off the bed, running up to her and licking her hand.

She started, then relaxed on seeing the dog. She closed her eyes and took a deep, shuddering breath while she rubbed his head. "Hey boy," she whispered. "You watched him like I asked?"

"Woof!"

"That's good. I--" She glanced over at me for the first time, and her eyes widened. "Sh--Shadow! You're awake!"

"For a change." I rubbed the back of my head irritably. "How long was I out this time?"

"Out? Not...um...just a few hours, I guess."

"You guess?"

Her face turned red. "Hey! I've been busy, okay?"

"Busy with what?"

And then, she exploded. "WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU CARE? I just was! Is that all right with you?"

I narrowed my eyes. _What in the world..._ "Relm, are you all right?"

"All right? Oh, I'm fine. I'm better than fine, I'm fucking wonderful! Gramps has a limp, everyone's going crazy, and you're--" Her eyes widened, and she clapped her hands over her mouth.

My face darkened. _Not her too._ What was it with people not wanting to talk about me?

I opened my mouth, but before I could speak, Relm went back on the attack. "Good goddesses, the stench here is worse than the common room! What were they doing, sponge-bathing you with a chamberpot? Go take a bath, _now!_ Interceptor and I will wait downstairs."

_**Slam!**_

And just like that, she and the dog were gone.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

_**LEAP OF FAITH**_

A Final Fantasy VI Fanfic

by

Lunaludus Scribex

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

**CHAPTER VII**

It seemed like the entire second floor of the inn was deserted. There was no one in the baths, and I neither encountered nor heard a single soul as I traversed the hall between the baths and my room.

Relm's panicked fury ran through my mind again as I got dressed. Sometime between the old man--Strago, I reminded myself--trying to finish what Kefka's tower started and my waking up, something had thrown her--badly--and I was involved, somehow.

I had a feeling that if I had my memories, I'd know how.

I also had a feeling that if I had my memories, I'd never have allowed Strago to see my face in the first place.

"...and I don't think it was Shadow who killed her."

My feet froze at the top of the stairs as Locke's voice drifted up. My eyes widened as Relm's voice quickly responded. "But Gramps said--"

"Relm, I think it's safe to say there's more to this than Strago has said so far." I slowly began to creep down the stairs, listening carefully to Locke's voice. "My idea could just as easily fit the facts as his, and Shadow was married to the village healer besides."

_I'm married?_ This was new. I straightened up--then Locke's wording hit me. _Was_ married...the past tense.

I wasn't married anymore.

Locke continued. "You'd think the presumption would be in Shadow's favor, wouldn't you?"

I started down the stairs again as Relm paused before answering. "You're right." She paused again, longer this time. "Then, the fact that it wasn't--"

"Shadow wasn't exactly Thamasa's favorite son, I'd bet."

"Where?" I asked as I hit the landing.

Relm's head whipped around, and her eyes widened. Interceptor barked happily, and bounded over to meet me.

Locke leaned back in his chair. "Thamasa. A little village on an island in the east--sorry, it's in the southeast now." I blinked in confusion, but he continued before I had a chance to speak. "It's where Relm and Strago--that's the old man that jumped you--are from."

"And where I'm from?"

He nodded. "Not originally, but at one point, yeah."

Relm gave Locke a worried look. "Should you be talking about that? His memories could--"

"His memories took second place when someone stuck a poisoned knife in his side."

She shrugged. "Your funeral."

"Better mine than his." Locke turned back to me. "Terra should probably be the one to explain things, though. She has the best idea of what shape you're in."

She was also the most likely to want to keep me in the dark...but, judging from the look on Locke's face, he already knew that. I sighed. "All right, then. Where is she?"

"She and Celes went out to look for your doctor, I think," Locke said. "Oh, and we sent Setzer and Strago back to the _Falcon_ to resupply, so you don't have to worry about them for a while."

I nodded. "I see. What now, then?"

"How does lunch sound? I know a good place, and you could use the exercise."

Could I ever! "It sounds good to me. What about you, Relm?"

She snorted. "You think I'm going to spend ten seconds in this shit hole I don't have to? Of course I'm coming!"

* * *

Relm, as it happened, proclaimed this glowing opinion within earshot of one Master Paparo, who took it as a cue that we wished him to escort us to the door. A minute and a half later (once we were safely out of range of the broom-wielding maniac) Locke took the lead, since he knew where we were going. I followed, and Relm and Interceptor brought up the rear. 

We'd only been walking for about five minutes when Relm spoke up. "Hey, Locke, do you mind if we stop here for a minute?"

"Here?" Locke turned back, saw the building Relm was hungrily eyeing, and groaned. "Relm, can't it wait?"

"Actually, no." Relm never took her eyes off the building. "This is the only shop on the continent that stocks that shade of blue, and I'm all out."

"I understand that, but--"

"A few minutes won't kill him." She turned to me. "Right?"

I blinked. "Um...right, I guess." My stomach chose that moment to rumble loudly, and Relm scowled.

"Relm..."

"It won't take long--I promise," she said, then darted into the shop before Locke could speak again. He sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose as Interceptor wandered over to us.

I took a closer look at the building. There was an insignia of some kind by the door, but other than that it was wholly unremarkable. "What kind of shop is this?"

"An art shop," Locke replied. "Relm's a painter."

"Really?" I blinked in surprise, trying to fit this into my conception of the girl. "Is she any good?"

Locke chuckled. "Oh, she's good. Her portraits don't come to life anymore, but you still think they might, sometimes."

"Really? She's that--wait a minute. 'Come to life'?"

Locke gave me an odd look. "Magic. Didn't Terra tell you?"

I shifted uncomfortably. That wasn't a conversation I liked to remember. "She said something, but..."

I trailed off, and Locke smacked his forehead. "Terra," he muttered softly, "what are you thinking?" He sighed again, more heavily. "Tell you what--I'll explain that over lunch. She really should have told you that much, at least."

I nodded. "Thank you, I appreciate that." I started to say more, but at that moment, a familiar voice rang through the air.

"Ah! Miss Branford's friend!"

I stiffened.

I knew that voice. I had hoped to get out of Albrook without hearing it again.

Slowly, reluctantly, I turned to meet the seamstress.

It was my first time seeing her in full daylight, and my eyes picked out details I hadn't noticed before. Her dress was surprisingly plain for someone who made her own clothes, a simple tan and white outfit with a pine green vest. Her rich brown hair was gathered into a ponytail that streamed out behind her as she ran towards us.

She looked happy, I absently noted as she reached us and seized my hands. "I'm so glad you're all right!" Her expression turned stern for a moment. "She was very worried about you, you know."

I blinked in confusion. "When would Terra have--oh, right. The dress."

Locke coughed lightly, and she released my hands as we looked over. "Friend of yours?" he asked.

"Of Terra's. We met just before I was..."

"Right."

I turned back to the seamstress. "Look, I want to apologize for how I left that day. It was..."

She shook her head. "No need to say another word. I was wrong to push."

I shook my head in turn. "You couldn't have known." _And hopefully, you still don't know why._

She didn't answer, just tilted her head and looked at me. I felt my hackles rise as she continued to hold my gaze. _She doesn't know...right?_

Then she smiled and turned away, and the moment was over. "So, who is your friend here--oh my!"

Interceptor pounced without warning, sending her tumbling to the ground. Locke's face paled, and I braced myself to haul the dog off her--but then, we heard her delighted laughter. Interceptor licked her face and I let out a sigh of relief.

"That impatient fellow's name is Interceptor. And this is Locke...um..."

"Locke Cole, ma'am." Interceptor backed off as he reached down and helped her to her feet. "It's always a pleasure to meet one of Terra's friends."

"Likewise." She brushed herself off, then smiled at us. "My name is Ariadne. I make clothing here in Albrook."

"A seamstress, huh?" Locke cocked his head. "How do you know Terra?"

"We first met during the...well, you know." Locke nodded, and she went on. "She stayed with me for a few weeks, then moved on. After that, she came in every couple of months. She'd buy clothes in bulk each time, and we'd talk."

Locke's eyes darkened, and after a moment I understood. _Mobliz._ It was a sensitive subject for Terra. He nodded for her to continue.

"Last year, though, she stopped coming. I didn't see her again until a few weeks ago. Were you with her, then...?"

"Yes."

She beamed, and seized Locke's hands in her own. "Whatever you did for her, thank you! She's much happier now than she ever was before."

"Locke, you sly dog!"

Locke's face turned red, and he let go of Ariadne's hands as if he'd been scalded. He turned to face Relm, who stepped out of the shop with a box in hand and an evil grin on her face. "What in the world would Celes say?"

"Nothing," Locke replied in a remarkably even tone of voice. "Because you're not going to tell her..._right?_" He sent her a pointed look, and she winced.

Ariadne blinked. "Excuse me, but who...?"

"This is Relm," Locke said, still in that eerily level voice. "She's another friend of Terra's." He paused for a moment, as if in thought. "Oh, and ours, too." Relm's face turned red, and I couldn't help but grin. _Point for Cole._

Relm gave Locke a look that promised much pain in his future, but didn't respond to the barb verbally. "She knows Terra?" she asked instead.

Locke nodded. "So it seems."

Ariadne ignored the interplay for the moment, and turned back to me. "Are you looking for Miss Branford again?"

Locke and Relm abruptly broke off their staring match and turned to me, identical grins on their faces. "'Again'?"

"Hey!"

Ariadne ignored them again, continuing with that same placid smile. "If you are, I saw her less than an hour ago. I think she and her friend were headed for World's End."

Locke wrinkled his brow. "World's End..."

"I know where that is," I said. "Terra sent me there to get some medicine before..."

"Where is it?" Relm asked.

I pointed back the way we'd come.

"Fuck."

Locke shook his head. "Your call," he told me. "Do you want to go find them now?"

I was hungry, but not urgently so. "I don't mind, I guess."

"Relm?"

She gave Locke a long, measuring look. "If you and Celes start making out in the street, so help me--"

* * *

They were still squabbling when I finally stopped in front of World's End. 

In fact, they were so wrapped up in their argument that they walked right past me.

"You have no room to say that after the way we found you and Gau in--"

"THAT WAS A FUCKING ACCIDENT! And even if it _was_ deliberate, at least we weren't out in broad daylight--"

I sighed heavily and glanced down at Interceptor. "At least _you're_ paying attention."

Interceptor looked back up at me, and for a moment I could have sworn he was almost as exasperated as I was. Then he turned and trotted after the receding pair.

"And another thing--that would never have happened if you hadn't ta-**YEEEEOWCH!**" Locke jumped in the air, both hands flying to where Interceptor had sunk his teeth into his rump. He spun around when he landed and glared at the dog, while Relm burst into laughter. "What was _that_ for?"

Interceptor barked once, then turned and trotted back to me, stopping halfway there to look back at them with a pointed gaze.

I put up my hands and took a step back as Locke stormed toward me. "I didn't tell him to do that, I swear."

"Then who _did_--" My stomach rumbled loudly, cutting him off. "Oh. Sorry."

Relm came up to us at a more leisurely pace, and turned to look at the shop. "So...this is it?"

I nodded, feeling the same chill as the last time I was here. "Yeah, this is World's End. It's a little dark inside, but..."

Relm snorted. "Oh, how brilliant. What gave it away--the fact _there are no windows?_"

I blinked at her acid tone. Locke laid a hand on her shoulder, but she shrugged it off, never letting her hazel-tinted glare leave my face. Those eyes still bothered me, and I felt a sudden rush of anger. Why was she going after me, all of a sudden?

"Well...shall we go in?" Locke asked.

With an effort, I turned back to the building. "Yeah. We won't get anything done standing around here." I put my hand on the knob, then paused as something crossed my mind. "Relm," I said, keeping my eyes firmly fixed on the door, "you're a painter, right?"

"...Yeah. Why?"

I just smiled and shook my head, then took a breath, pulled the door open and stepped inside.

I was ready for the smoke this time, and barely let it faze me as I strode in. Locke and Relm were not, and I stepped aside, making room for them to get over their coughing fits.

Relm recovered first, and I felt a small burst of pleasure as she softly gasped. "Oh...my..."

She scampered over to one wall, staring raptly, and I tried for a moment to put myself in her shoes. I knew the combination of low lighting and colored glass had left a strong impression on me, but how would she, an artist, view it?

Then again--why was I so concerned with what she thought of it, anyway?

Locke's coughing fit finally died, and he came up to stand next to me. "This is..."

"Locke?"

We looked over to the front table. Terra stood there with a quizzical look on her face.

"Terra!" Locke strode forward, holding out his hand. "Good, you're here!" He glanced at the empty front table. "Celes, too?"

Terra grasped his hand briefly and smiled. "She's discussing something with the shopkeeper in back."

"Er...in back?"

"Cellar behind the table."

"Oh."

"Hey, Terra!" Relm abandoned her study of the wall and ran over to the pair.

Terra blinked. "Relm, you're here too? But then, who's watching..." Her voice died as she looked over Locke's shoulder and caught sight of me. I gave her a weak smile, and waved.

She pushed by Locke and stormed up to me. "_What are you doing out of bed?_" she hissed.

"Pardon?"

"He was going stir-crazy, Terra." Locke came up behind her, with Relm right beside him. "For that matter, so was Relm." He paused. "Also, we have some things to...discuss."

Terra looked at Locke uneasiliy. "Why do I not like the sound of that?"

"Because you shouldn't." Terra tried to say something, but Locke continued before she could interrupt. "Terra, he didn't even know what _magic_ was! I thought you said you were going to explain things to him!"

"I did!" Locke gave her a look. "...kind of."

"_Kind of?_"

She turned red. "Look, between the nightmares and his keeling over, there was just no way..."

"That's no excuse. You were twice as bad off when I first met you--"

"And we both know how well _that_ turned out, don't we?" she snapped.

"That's not fair, Terra! His case is nothing like yours was."

"Isn't it, though? He's a--" She cut off suddenly, looking at me as if she'd just remembered I was there.

I looked back evenly. "Yes? What am I?"

She shifted uneasily.

"Well?"

"Ah, Celes!"

All three of us turned at Relm's exclamation. The girl quickly strode over to the front table, where I could see Celes emerging from the cellar.

I turned back to Terra to resume our conversation, but before I could say a word, she took off after Relm. I sighed quietly, then followed.

"Hello, Relm," Celes said quietly. Her face was drawn, and she did not look like she was in particularly good shape. "Terra, when did--" Then she caught sight of me, and stopped dead. She looked at me for a moment, then closed her eyes and rubbed the bridge of her nose. "At least you had the good sense to leave Interceptor outside."

Terra shot me a sharp look, then turned back to Celes. "So, how is it?"

"It's fi--" She looked over Terra's shoulder, and froze. "Locke, you're here too?"

Terra's eyes widened, then she winced. "Oops."

"'Oops'?" Celes' face flushed deep red. "_Terra--!_"

"It's not my fault! I didn't think Sha--"

I clapped my hand over her mouth as the same shopkeeper from my last time in here emerged from the stairs, that same disturbing smile on his face. She turned her head to glare at me, and I glared right back. "Watch it with the name," I hissed.

Her eyes widened. She nodded quickly, and I released her. "Sorry," she said, then moved away from me.

"Is there something I should know?" the shopkeeper asked.

"No!" I snapped without thinking.

I wished I hadn't a moment later.

The shopkeeper's eyes widened as he fully took me in. "You!" he exclaimed. "My goodness, you're still alive?"

Now, everyone was looking at me. "Er, well..."

"'Still alive'?" Celes' eyes narrowed, and I took an involuntary step back. "What's going on here?"

I chuckled nervously. "Um, well...when I was in here last, I kind of had him appraise..." I gestured at the knives on my belt. "You know."

Terra made a strangled sound, and Locke smacked his forehead. I glared at him. "Hey! If you or Terra had bothered to tell me how famous it was--"

"All right, that's enough," Celes barked. She caught my eye, then glanced over at the shopkeeper...who looked very, very interested. I swallowed briefly, looked back at Celes, and nodded.

She nodded back, then continued. "The doctor will contact us tomorrow morning, I have what I came for, and this incense is starting to give me a headache." She said this last with a glare that sent the shopkeeper shrinking back. "So, unless any of you have some reason to stay here any longer..."

My stomach rumbled again.

Locke chuckled. "Well said." He turned to Celes and Terra. "Actually, we came here because I wanted to invite you two to lunch. There's a great place where we can eat and discuss our friend's...recovery."

Behind Celes, Terra flinched.

Celes nodded. "I don't have a problem with that. Terra?"

Terra looked at Locke for a long moment; then, her shoulders slumped, and she sighed quietly. "All right. Let's go."

* * *

Once we were back outside and on our way, Locke turned around. "Celes, are you--" 

"Fine," she snapped. "I'm absolutely fine."

Terra frowned. "Celes..."

"What? There's nothing wrong with me!"

Locke blinked slowly. "I never said there was."

Celes' eyes widened for a moment, and her face reddened slightly. "...Enough about me," she said hurriedly. "How are _you_ feeling?"

It took me a moment to realize who she was talking to. "Me?" How was I _feeling?_

She nodded.

_I wake up after ten days, Strago knocks me out again for a couple of hours, and she wants to know how I'm FEELING?_ My eyes narrowed. "I'm walking, aren't I?"

Celes gave me a disgusted look, then turned on her heel and walked away. Locke glanced at me for a moment, then followed her.

Terra laid a hand on my shoulder. "Seriously--are you all right? You look..."

I shook my head. "I'm hungry, and I've been listening to Locke and Relm fight for the last half hour. Other than that..." I shrugged.

She smiled. "Okay, I understand."

We walked for a while in silence. Relm and Interceptor paced just ahead of us, while Locke and Celes had a brief discussion before Locke moved on ahead.

As Locke moved away, Relm advanced to take his place. "Um...Celes..."

"Yes, Relm?"

"Locke said that you told him I would be..."

Celes turned to look at her.

"Look--just don't tell Gramps I heard, okay?"

Celes held Relm's eyes for a moment before giving a curt nod.

Beside me, Terra laughed softly. "I thought so."

"About what?"

"Relm was listening in on us earlier, when Strago--" Her eyes widened, and she cut herself off.

I glared at her. "Terra..."

She held her hands up defensively. "I'm sorry. I"m not trying to be difficult, I promise. It's just that..."

I closed my eyes and sighed. "Well, then, maybe you can explain something else."

"I'll try."

"Relm."

"What about her?"

"Locke said something about how her paintings used to come to life." I opened my eyes again. "What did he mean by that?"

Terra chuckled. "Hard as it is to believe, he meant that literally. She'd sketch a picture of an enemy in battle, and the picture would jump off the page and fight for us. We decided to let her join us after we saw her use it in a battle." She grinned wryly. "Of course, Relm being Relm, she wasn't supposed to be there in the first place, but..."

I refused to be sidetracked. "How? How could she be able to do something like that?"

"Relm and Strago are both from a small village called Thamasa. It's..." She frowned. "Actually, I'm not sure where it is from here, now."

"How do you mean?"

"Long story. Anyway, what's important is that Thamasa is home to the descendants of the Mage Warriors."

"Mage Warriors?"

"From..." She groaned. "Right. You don't remember about the War of the Magi, do you?"

I shook my head.

"It was fought a thousand years ago. The Mage Warriors were magic users who fought in the war. Once the war ended, though, they were persecuted."

_Magic, again?_ I was tempted to stop her and ask about that instead, but Locke had already promised me an explanation of what magic was at lunch--and something told me that I needed to hear this. "Persecuted? Why?"

"The War of the Magi destroyed everything. Cities, countries...civilization. The survivors of the war blamed magic for the devastation." She frowned darkly. "Magic...and the Mage Warriors."

I looked up ahead at Relm, and felt a sudden chill. "How bad was it?"

"Only a few survived. The rest..." Terra shuddered. "Strago told us they were hunted down like animals."

My eyes widened. In my mind, I saw Relm being attacked by dozens of screaming men armed with spears, and for an instant my entire being was flooded with white-hot rage.

Then, just as suddenly, it vanished, leaving me feeling empty and drained.

Terra went on, not looking at me. "The survivors made their way to Thamasa. They hid away there, passing their powers on to their descendants--along with strict laws to protect them from being exposed. And after that..." She sighed quietly. "After that, as far as the rest of the world was concerned, until about twenty years ago, there was no more magic."

_Twenty years ago?_ "What happened then?"

Her face darkened. "Gestahl happened."

"Gestahl?"

She frowned at the ground for a moment, then shook her head.

"Terra?"

"We're here!"

I looked up, and saw Locke waving to us from a half-curtained doorway. Celes stood beside him, with Relm and Interceptor a few steps behind. From the sound of things, the restaurant was doing good business today. "I hope they can take us."

"Hopefully," Terra said. "It's Locke, though, so chances are he knows the owner somehow."

I opened my mouth to respond when a rich aroma reached us, and my steps faltered.

Relm took a deep, appreciative sniff. "Mmm...smells good."

I frowned. "Smells good" was an understatement; my mouth was watering as we stood there. It was strong, and appetizing...and familiar, for some reason.

Locke pushed the curtain to one side and stuck his head in. "Hey, granny!"

An old, rickety voice responded after a moment's pause. "Locke Cole!" The voice laughed harshly. "How long has it been since you showed your face in here, you scoundrel?"

"Too long."

"I heard voices--how many with you?"

"Four others, and--"

He cut off as Interceptor suddenly let out a low snarl, and pulled his head back outside. "Interceptor?" He gave the dog a puzzled look, then turned to us.

Terra raised her hands defensively. "Don't look at me."

Relm went down to her knees. "What's wrong, boy? You want to wait outside?"

Interceptor looked at her, then at me, then trotted over to one side of the door. He turned so that he was facing the street, and sat.

I looked over at Relm. She looked just as surprised as I was.

"Is something wrong?" the voice from within the restaurant called.

Locke started. "No, nothing." He glanced over at Interceptor, then shook his head. "There are five of us."

He ducked in, and the others followed suit. I lingered outside a moment, and crouched down by the dog. "Interceptor, are you sure?"

Interceptor cocked his head and looked at me.

"All right, then." I straightened up, and pushed the curtains aside. "Wait for us here, okay b--_ack!_"

Something slammed against my shins as I stepped inside, sending me tumbling face-first to the floor.

"I thought I heard you out there," the voice that had greeted Locke earlier said from behind me.

I looked up, and caught a glimpse of Locke and the others staring at me in shock before my head was roughly shoved back down. "Tell me," the voice continued in a conversational tone. "Do you recall what I told you the last time you set foot in here?"

"Granny," Locke said, "he's with--"

"Not anymore, he isn't." Something hard prodded under the side of my jaw. "Answer the question."

I flinched from the contact. "I don't know what you're talking about!"

"Of _course_ you don't," the voice sneered. "Do you take me for a fool, Shadow?"

There was a loud _clang_, then a splash as someone dropped a filled pot. The sounds echoed throughout the restaurant--a restaurant that, I realized with a familiar sinking sensation, had gone completely silent.

After a moment, the pressure on my neck eased away. "Get up."

I pushed myself up to my hands and knees, then went up to one knee--but before I could do anything more, a burly arm wrapped around me, pinning my arms to my sides, and whipped my body around with enough force that my feet left the ground. I closed my eyes briefly against the disorientation, and when I felt the dizziness leave me, I opened my eyes again--and gaped.

For a bare second, I thought I was looking at my doctor in drag. The figure standing before me was just as short--the gnarled staff she held only came up to my waist, but was closer to a quarterstaff for her--and just as wrinkled, and there was something similar in her bearing. But then I looked into her eyes, and I knew this was someone different.

There was nothing but loathing in her gaze--loathing, and contempt.

I found my voice at last. "Who..." I cut myself off as I felt the sharp, cold touch of a knife under my chin.

"_Granny--!_"

"Young Master Cole seems to think you're worth something, now." She spat to one side. "Which just goes to show how little he knows. But, out of respect to him, this time--_this time!_--I'll let you go."

I chanced a glance over at the others. Locke's face was pale, and he stared at us in bewilderment.

"But mark my words, Shadow, because this is the last time I'll repeat myself." My eyes jerked back to the woman, and she drew herself up. "You are not welcome here. You will _never_ be welcome here. If your shadow ever darkens my doorway again, you will not leave alive."

I stared down at the woman. There was nothing else I could do.

"Turn around."

The man holding me from behind inched around, forcing me with him until I was facing the doorway. The knife lifted from my throat.

"Now get out of my sight."

The man shoved me away, sending me stumbling face-first into the curtain before sprawling to the ground outside.

* * *

Interceptor came away from the wall as I forced myself up to my hands and knees. He paused before me, as if examining me for a moment before barking once and licking my cheek. 

I grinned wryly. "You were trying to warn me, weren't you?" I brought my fingers up to my throat where the bouncer had put his knife, and grimaced; they came away with a few traces of blood. "Ugh...next time, I listen to you."

I rubbed him behind the ears, then forced myself back up to my feet. The noise was already picking back up in the restaurant, now that I was gone. I sighed heavily, then walked across the street and leaned against a wall to wait for the others to come out.

The only problem was...they didn't.

I grew more and more uneasy as the minutes passed by. I couldn't believe it, but... "They aren't actually _eating_ in there, are they?"

My stomach chose that moment to rumble unhappily. I looked over at the restaurant, and felt my face slowly turn red. I'd just been thrown out of there--with a knife to my throat for good measure--and they were going to stay behind to _EAT?_

I abruptly pushed myself away from the wall and spun on my heel. "Interceptor, come!" I stalked briskly away from the restaurant, heading for the inn. There, at least, I could get some food.

I was in a foul mood, and the people around me on the street seemed to sense it. Crowds melted away before me, people scrambled to get out of my way...not always successfully. I bumped into someone who wasn't quite fast enough and snarled out a half-hearted apology.

"Ah!"

I stopped short. It was Ariadne.

I groaned softly; right now, I wanted nothing more than to get back to the inn, eat, go to sleep, and hope than when I woke up this day would never have happened. Still--the last thing I needed was someone else angry at me when I could avoid it. "Sorry about that."

Ariadne shook her head. "Never mind me, what happened to you? Your clothes are covered with dust, and--oh my, you're bleeding!"

I reached up to my throat. Sure enough, the cut had opened again. "Don't worry about it. It's just a scratch."

She gave me a dubious look, but let it go. "Did you meet up with Miss Branford?"

"Yeah, we met up. They're having something to eat right now."

She blinked. "They are? What about you?"

My stomach growled.

"...I see."

I shook my head. "You probably don't." _Wait--why am I defending them?_ I thought about it for a few seconds, then mentally shrugged. It was instinctual--supposedly, these were my friends, and I guessed that on some level I still remembered that. "It's not a big deal; I just had a disagreement with the restaurant's owner."

"_Not a big deal?_"

I stiffened. _Just when I thought this day couldn't get any worse..._ Ariadne and I turned to the man who'd seen fit to interject himself into our conversation. "You."

Setzer ignored my greeting in favor of a contemptuous sneer. "There's actually a restaurateur in this godforsaken town with a shred of taste, and you think it's _not a big deal?_" He laughed derisively. "Where were you born, Zozo?"

"What of it?" I snapped--then stopped short. _I was born in Zozo?_ My eyes widened. How did I know that? I'd never even heard of the place until just now!

Setzer snorted. "I might have guessed. That would explain why you're bothering this young woman." He turned to the seamstress, and his manner changed drastically. "Ariadne, it's a pleasure to see you again."

"Likewise, Mr. Gabbiani." Ariadne looked him over for a moment. "I see you're not wearing the coat I made for you today--is it holding up well?"

Setzer gestured negligently to one side. "It did well enough."

"Did...?"

"I found one in Jidoor that fit me better." Ariadne's face lost all expression. "But for the materials around here, it was excellent work."

Interceptor growled deep in his throat, and I was tempted to join him. "Interceptor, down." Ariadne made and altered the clothes she sold herself; to say to her face that she was an inferior craftswoman--! "...for the moment."

Setzer put one hand to his cheek in mock horror. "Am I supposed to feel threatened?" His lip curled. "I don't know who I pity more--Ariadne for being stuck with a backstabbing, honorless guttersnipe for a champion, or you for trying to pretend that someone like _you_ could be a champion in the first place! I--"

"Mr. Gabbiani! That's enough!"

"No," I said. "Let him finish."

"But--"

"Ariadne. Please."

Ariadne frowned, then backed away.

I turned back to the gambler. "Setzer. You don't like me. You've gone out of your way to make that clear to me." My eyes narrowed. "I suppose an explanation would be too much to ask?"

Setzer's eyes widened. "An explanation? You want an _explanation?_" He threw back his head and laughed.

"What's so funny?" I snapped.

"You--_Shadow_--want an explanation for why everyone hates you?"

It seemed like time stopped. My eyes widened; my blood turned to ice. Almost involuntarily, my gaze darted to Ariadne--and I received a fresh shock. She looked back at me, unhappy but also unfazed.

_She already knew...!_

Setzer continued, ignoring both of us. "Is there anything else you're curious about? Why the sky is blue, perhaps? I...huh? Hey!"

He finally noticed he'd lost his audience when I turned to Ariadne. "You knew."

She nodded.

"How long...?"

"Miss Branford told me, when you were hurt."

"Then why...?"

"I told you before, didn't I? Any friend of Miss Branford is a friend of mine. I trust her." Setzer snorted, but Ariadne took no notice of him. "Besides..."

"What?"

"I won't pretend I wasn't surprised at first." She paused for a moment, as if looking for the words. "But I did some hard thinking, and I have to wonder--how much of Shadow is Shadow?"

I blinked. "Huh?"

"In your line of work, it pays to be feared, doesn't it?" I frowned. _Line of work...?_ "Reputation is just as important as reality--more so, I'd think. Why shouldn't you let people think you're worse than you actually are, if it makes things easier all around?"

"I don't understand."

"Neither do I," Setzer said. "How could you possibly believe that garbage?"

She frowned at him. "Because I have eyes, Mr. Gabbiani, and the man I've watched isn't someone who could do things like that."

I shook my head. "That's not what I--"

Just then, we heard a bell chime in the distance, and Ariadne jumped in surprise. "Oh, my! It's this late, already? I have to go!" She turned, ran a couple of steps, then stopped and turned back to us. "I hope to speak with you again soon, Mr. Shadow! Mr. Gabbiani..." Her smile dimmed for a moment, then she shook her head. "Thank you for your patronage." She nodded to us both, then turned again and dashed off.

Setzer glared after her. "The nerve of that ungrateful wench! I--_ack!_"

I turned, grabbed him by the lapels of his coat, and slammed him against the wall of a nearby building. "Just what the hell did you think you were doing?" I snarled. Interceptor growled his concurrence behind me.

Setzer opened his eyes wide in innocence. "Doing?" He wasn't very convincing.

"I've already had someone try to kill me because of who I am once today." His expression didn't change, and my eyes narrowed. "That doesn't surprise you, does it?"

"What of it?" he asked scornfully.

"The next time you go blabbing my name out in public, I'm going to assume that's what you're doing."

He smirked. "And?"

A red haze descended over my vision, and I felt my mouth curl up, baring my teeth. I released him, then jammed my left forearm up under his chin, driving him back against the wall. My right hand reached down to my hip, then whipped out the Striker, bringing it to a halt less than an inch from his face.

My voice went flat. "And I'll act accordingly."

I felt his body go rigid under my grasp, but none of that touched his face. Instead, he sneered down at me. "Same old Shadow." His eyes narrowed menacingly. "She'll never forgive you, you know."

I didn't bother to answer him, just held him up against the wall and waited. Then, my stomach rumbled impatiently, reminding me I had better things to waste my time on.

I stepped back, replacing the Striker in its sheath, and glared at him for a few seconds longer. Then, I turned on my heel and resumed my trek to the inn.

* * *

The innkeeper looked up with a smile as I walked through the door. "Welcome--! Oh. You." His eyes narrowed, and his mustache twitched, but his face showed no other change. He wasn't showing the same naked terror as that night the sailor attacked me, but he was not at ease with me by any stretch of the imagination. 

At the moment, my stomach didn't give much of a damn either way.

I stalked to the bar, ignoring people scrambling out of the way in the corner of my eye, and sat down. Interceptor curled up at my feet. "Food. Now."

Master Paparo blinked. "What--"

He jumped as I slammed my palm down on the countertop, sending the dishes of those sitting alongside me rattling. I closed my eyes, and silently counted to five. "Just...do it."

He frowned at me, but nodded after a moment. "All right."

The man sitting to my left nudged me hard with his elbow. "Hey! What's your prob--"

I turned and looked at him.

"...Never mind."

I turned back to the counter.

I heard a disgusted grunt behind me. "Still up to your old tricks, are you?"

I turned again. "You."

The man who had attacked me earlier in the day stood before me, still wearing those same leathers. His right leg was wrapped in bandages from just below the knee, and he leaned heavily on a staff.

"Strago, wasn't it?" At my feet, Interceptor let out a menacing growl. "Interceptor, down."

Strago glanced down at the dog, and shook his head in disgust. "Don't know what I was thinking, agreeing to let Relm take care of that beast..."

I cocked an eyebrow. "From what I've seen of Relm, I doubt she gave you a choice."

His head whipped up, and he glowered at me. "What would _you_ know of Relm, you--you--!"

The innkeeper returned, holding a mug. "Is there a problem here?"

"No." "Yes!"

The innkeeper looked between the two of us for a moment, then set the drink on the counter before me. "Your meal will still be a few more minutes."

I glanced over at him. "Expedite it."

"I assure you--"

"I haven't eaten all day. Expedite it."

He stiffened, then nodded. "Understood."

Strago watched Master Paparo walk away with a disapproving look, then frowned at me.

"What?"

"You enjoyed that, didn't you?" I looked at him, puzzled, and he gestured to where the innkeeper had stood. "You enjoy bullying people around, making them jump at the slightest sound." He scowled. "You haven't changed at all."

_Same old Shadow._

I groaned, and gently massaged the bridge of my nose. "Not you too."

"What, someone else pointed out that the world would be a better place without you in it?"

"Hey!" I glared down at him. "Look, I don't know what your problem is, but--"

"My problem? My problem is _you!_" A few people nearby turned in their seats to watch as Strago yelled at me. "My problem is that I didn't kill you when you first walked into my life! My problem is that you're still here to ruin _Relm's_ life! My problem is--"

"Wait, what does Relm have to do with anything?"

"EVERYTHING!" he bellowed. "If I have my way, she'll never have anything to do with _you_ again!"

"'Again'?" His eyes widened, and mine narrowed in turn. "So she _does_ have something to do with me, then. What is it?"

His face turned red. "The hell if I'm going to tell you! I hope you _never_ remember that! Bad enough that dog--" He stopped abruptly and looked down at Interceptor. His eyes widened further. "Wait a minute. That dog was with _her_ this morning. How did _you_ get it?"

"I--"

"Where is she? _Where's Relm?_"

"Thanks for waiting. Here's--"

Strago jumped forward before Master Paparo could finish, grabbed the plate out of his hands, and smashed it over my face.

I fell back off my stool with a pained roar. I reached up to my face, trying to wipe off the boiling hot food, when I felt Strago's hands wrap around my neck.

"WHERE'S MY GRANDDAUGHTER?"

Pandemonium erupted around us. I heard people shouting and cheering, and Paparo yelling at us to take it outside. Interceptor was snarling in the background, but Strago ignored it all, and slammed my head back against the floor.

"_WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER?_"

I tried to answer, but I couldn't breathe; I felt my body shudder as spots began to form before my eyes--and then, he was jerked away, and I could breathe again.

"Off! Get off of him!"

I clambered unsteadily to my feet, wiping the remainder of the food out of my eyes. I looked over, and saw Strago being held back from attacking me by two sailors, while two others tried to pry Interceptor loose from Strago's bandaged leg. The dog worried and tore at the flesh, and I realized with a start that if this continued much longer, Strago would need that staff for the rest of his life. "Interceptor, enough!"

Interceptor growled through Strago's leg, refusing to let go.

"_Interceptor!_"

Finally, the dog released him. The two sailors holding Interceptor jumped back abruptly as he snapped at them, dropping him to the floor. Interceptor barked at them once, then walked back to my side.

The innkeeper glared at me. "That dog is a menace!"

"The menace is _him!_" All eyes were drawn back to Strago, who'd barely noticed Interceptor letting go of his leg in his struggles to get free and resume his attack. "Damn you, you miserable waste of breath! You don't deserve to live! You didn't deserve to live fourteen years ago, and you sure as hell don't deserve to live now!"

"Strago--"

"_Ulena should have let you die!_"

I felt my heart freeze in my chest. _Ulena..._ The name was familiar, but how? I'd never heard it before, but--and how could he say--_how could he_--

"_Damn you,_ Clyde! Damn you to the deepest pit of--"

"All right, that's enough!" Paparo finally stepped behind him and jabbed sharply behind his ear. Strago's eyes rolled up in his head, and he slumped limply in the sailors' arms. "Get him out of here!"

The men carried Strago away, and the innkeeper turned to me, eyes blazing. "And as for you--get back to your room, and _stay there!_" I jumped back at the sudden hostility in his voice. "I've been told you're finally leaving tomorrow, and it can't happen soon enough for my taste!"

My stomach growled furiously, reminding me of what Strago had done with my meal. "My food--"

Paparo exploded. "You'll get _what_ I give you, _when_ I give it to you, _AND BE GRATEFUL FOR IT!_"

I stared at him in shock.

"I don't care anymore!" he ranted. "Kill me, if you want--at this rate, by the time you're done, I won't have a livelihood left anyway! Look at this! LOOK AT THIS!" He waved his arms around the common room, and I winced--tables were overturned, food and drink were scattered across the floor, and the room was practically deserted. "This is all your fault! Curse the day I agreed to let you under my roof! I'm..."

He continued to rave as I turned away, but I was no longer paying attention. I'd heard enough--more than enough. All I wanted was to get something to eat; was that too much to ask?

Apparently, it was.

Interceptor trailed after me as I stormed up the steps to my room, but I ordered him to stay on the other side of the door and keep watch.

I'd suddenly recalled that dogs were considered food in Zozo, and I didn't want to be tempted.

* * *

I watched from my vantage point, slumped back against the door, as evening gave way to night, and the stars emerged. A cool breeze whispered through the open window, rustling through the room and caressing my face, to my great aggravation--in an effort to ignore the awful hunger gnawing at my gut, I was trying to forget that I could feel _anything,_ and until the wind showed up, I'd been doing a pretty good job of it. 

I didn't get up to close the window, though. It was more trouble than it was worth.

With my back pressed against the door, I felt Interceptor growling on the other side before I actually heard him.

"Easy, Interceptor--just let me pass, okay?"

I breathed in sharply. _Terra._

Interceptor barked in response, and I heard Terra sigh heavily. "Damn it, Interceptor--Shadow! Shadow, I know you're listening!"

I very carefully kept my mouth shut.

"Look, could you at least tell me what happened with Strago?"

I clenched my fists tightly at my sides.

"We found him outside the inn with his leg all torn up again. The innkeeper's ranting about how you attacked each other in the common room and touched off a riot!"

I sighed quietly.

"Shadow, what were you _thinking?_ You--"

"I what?" I snapped, breaking my silence at last. I climbed to my feet, turned, and glared at the door. "I sat down, ordered a meal, and Strago picked it up and shoved it in my face! How the hell is that _my_ fault?"

"You could have reacted a little better!"

"How? By letting him strangle me? _Again?_"

When Terra next replied, her voice was a little more subdued. "You didn't have to sic Interceptor on him again."

Which confirmed my suspicions about how Strago's leg was hurt originally. "Again? I didn't sic Interceptor on him the _first_ time! He had as much business attacking me as the old woman at that restaurant--oh, and by the way, thank you _ever_ so much for sticking by me there!"

"Shadow, we didn't have a choice!"

"Of course you did," I scoffed. "While I stood outside and waited, the rest of you chose to sit down and eat there!"

"...You really think _that's_ what we were doing?"

"You sure as hell weren't following me outside to make sure I was all right!" I hit the door once, hard. "_Setzer_, I'd expect that from, but--oh, and that reminds me. Why did you tell Ariadne about me?"

I could almost hear Terra blink outside. "She was concerned about you, and wanted to know why you'd been attacked. It's not a big deal."

"Not a big deal?" My eyes widened. "I have people threatening my life because of who I am, and you think telling someone about me is _not a big deal?_ Damn it, Terra, you won't even tell _me_ who I am!"

"Shadow, that's different!"

"How? How is it different?"

"She already knew who Shadow was--she just didn't know that you're Shadow, that's all!"

"Oh, and that makes it better? _Everyone_ knows who Shadow is--except me! Do you see anything wrong with this picture?"

She let out a short, indistinct scream. "What do you want, Shadow? An apology? I'm sorry, all right?"

"No, it's not all right! Forget the apology--I want to know what you're hiding from me!"

There was a long moment of silence. "Shadow, we've talked about this before. You're not ready--that information is dangerous!"

"And someone I don't remember ever meeting before threatening to kill me isn't?"

"Do you really understand what you're asking for?"

"Yes. I'm asking why everyone who hears my name either tries to kill me or is afraid I'm going to try to kill _them!_"

Silence.

I leaned forward, resting my head against the door. "I can't live like this, Terra! Not without at least knowing why! What did I ever do to them? Answer me!"

Silence again.

"WHO AM I?"

Still no response.

"_Damn it, Terra!_"

"...All right."

I felt my pulse quicken. "Terra?"

"You really want to know? Then I'll tell you."

I breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you."

"Don't you _dare_ thank me for this," she snapped. "I still think you aren't ready." I heard her take a deep breath...and then, it came.

"You were a mercenary, Shadow. A bounty hunter...and an assassin."

I felt the air leave my lungs in an explosive rush. I heard Terra's footsteps as she walked away, but I wasn't really paying attention to her just then.

_An assassin..._

It made sense, now. The Striker--the perfect weapon for a killer. Why the old woman at the restaurant threw me out--who would want someone like _that_ anywhere near them?

I could understand it all, now. The sailor who attacked me--it made perfect sense! He tried to kill me because I'd killed--

Because _I'd killed--!_

Oh dear God.

_An assassin...!_

I slumped to my knees and stared at the door.

Suddenly, I wasn't hungry anymore.

_MAIOREM HAC DILECTIONEM NEMO HABET  
__UT ANIMAM SUAM QUIS PONAT PRO AMICIS SUIS_


	8. Chapter VIII

**PRELIMINARIES:** None of this belongs to me. Final Fantasy VI, and all worlds, characters, etc. associated with it, are the property of Square-Enix. Square-Enix is not affiliated in any way, shape, or form with the creation of this story (a fact for which, I suspect, they would be profoundly grateful). I have made liberal usage of their characters and settings in this story; this was done without their knowledge or permission, and is technically an infringement of Square-Enix's copyright. As this story is, at the most pragmatic level, free promotion of the Final Fantasy franchise, it is hoped that they will regard this story (if at all) with a benign ignorance. 

If you paid a wooden nickel for this story, not only have you been drastically overcharged, but whoever charged you has done so illegally, and I disavow any association with said individual(s). 

All feedback is welcome, up to and including line-by-line critiques (provided they fit in my mailbox). 

This story is archived in .txt and .htm format, along with my other works, at my website, The Codex Scribanus (see author profile). In the highly unlikely event that you wish to have a copy of this story for your own site's archives, you'll find distribution guidelines there. 

My prereaders, Shack and Kami, once again did yeoman's work in making this chapter fit for public consumption (albeit barely). If I deserve wooden nickels, they deserve wooden 10s and 20s. 

Now, sit back and either enjoy the ride, or (more likely) enjoy thinking of what you'll do to me at the end of it...

* * *

"Shadow?" 

I didn't look over as Celes entered the room. 

The midmorning sun shone through the window, striking my face from where I sat on the bed--but I paid that no mind, either. 

It had been a long, uncomfortable night. I couldn't sleep. I had no energy to move. 

And so, I sat. And thought. 

And tried to remember. 

_An assassin._

A few moments kept playing over in my head. The shopkeeper at World's End, staring at the Striker in horror. The owner of that restaurant, staring at me in hatred. 

A blackened, putrid corpse, staring at the sky. 

I had killed that man. It had been reflexive, natural--like I had done it a hundred, a thousand times before. 

And I felt nothing. 

The doctor had come in at one point, just after dawn. I didn't say anything, and neither did he; he just stared at me for a few moments, then pressed a spot on my chest and went back out the window. 

And after that, until now, I'd had no other visitors. 

Celes gripped my shoulder. I looked up at her, and she gave me a sympathetic nod. "We're ready to go," she said, and held out her hand. 

I took it after a moment, and she pulled me to my feet, then turned and walked out the door, not hesitating or looking back--as if she had every confidence in the world that I would obediently follow. 

She was right. 

I realized after a few minutes that we'd left the inn and were moving through Albrook, but beyond that, I neither knew nor cared to know any details. I paid no attention to my surroundings; my attention was focused wholly on Celes' back, and my feet trailed behind her as my mind continued to drift. 

"Took you long enough." 

My head jerked up at the voice, and I managed to stop myself just before I plowed into Celes from behind. Setzer stood before us, and just behind him was what had to be the _Falcon._

_It's big._

That was my first thought. The body of the airship settled gently on the ground, and looked to be a small building in and of itself; big as that was, though, it was dwarfed by the massive cream-colored blimp tethered overhead. Looking around, I realized we were outside the city limits, and further that this was probably as close as the _Falcon_ could get--the blimp was twice as wide as any street in Albrook. 

My second thought: _It looks fast._ The _Falcon_ was imposing, but it was also..._sleek_. Large as the blimp was, it was narrow, almost streamlined; two orange fins leaned back from the rear, making it look like it was screaming along even sitting on the ground. A mass of propellers crowded the rear, framing something dark protruding from the...was that a _booster engine?_

Celes drew in a sharp breath, and my attention returned to the ground. Setzer crossed his arms and grinned--had he said something else while I was gawking?--and when Celes spoke next, it was just short of a growl. "Setzer. You do _not_ want to push me today." 

"Hmph. Well, get on, then." Setzer turned away and strode for the ship, not hesitating or looking back--as if he couldn't care less whether he left us on the ground. "I've already spent more time in this hellhole than I care to think about." 

Celes and I hurried after him. 

I stopped as we entered the _Falcon._ It was darker belowdecks than it was outside--though not as dark as I would have expected--and I wanted to give my eyes a chance to get adjusted. 

The floor in front of me was shaped in a slight cross-shaped depression, with black and gray tiles arrayed like a checkerboard. The floor around it appeared to be a metal of some sort, laid out in a jagged, interlocking pattern. 

Opposite the doorway, just beyond the depression, a large couch nestled into a crook in the wall. The couch looked comfortable...I thought...comfortable to sit in, anyway. 

After all--when you were sitting in it, you couldn't really _look_ at it. 

Just standing in front of it was making my eyes hurt. The cushions were a hideous deep purple, with glaring pink highlights; I could feel a headache building, but at the same time couldn't look away from the monstrosity. 

"Shadow?" 

Celes' voice mercifully tore my gaze away to the right. She watched me at the base of a flight of steps. Setzer had stopped halfway up, and now scowled down at me. 

I chanced glancing at the couch once more, rubbed my eyes, then followed them. 

The stairs led to an upper level, though still belowdecks. Here, the floor was mostly deep-stained wood planks, with metal ringing the edges against the wall; a steel railing stood as protection against falling back to the lower level. 

Setzer and Celes crossed the floor to a ladder against the far wall. Setzer reached out and grabbed a rung, hesitated, then turned back to us and sneered. "Women and cripples first." 

Celes muttered something under her breath, but only gave Setzer another look before climbing the ladder. 

I didn't bother looking at Setzer. At the moment, I was simply too drained to care. 

"Shadow!" 

Terra's voice drew my eyes as I reached the deck, and I looked over to see her standing by Locke, Strago, Relm, and Interceptor. She tried to say something more, but Locke put a hand on her shoulder and shook his head. 

He looked up at me and grinned. "Good to see you up and about!" Interceptor barked what I took to be his agreement, while Strago crossed his arms and snorted. 

Only Relm did not speak. She just glared at me, barely moving a muscle. I looked back in puzzlement for a moment, then shook my head. Who knew what she was thinking? 

Setzer spoke up behind me. "All right, everyone's here? No one's..._forgotten_ anything?" 

I turned and gave him a flat look, but he just chuckled, while the others responded in a wave of negatives. "Excellent!" He clapped his hands, and strode over to a wheel near the bow. "Let's be off, then! We should hit Figaro in about five hours." 

I couldn't see what, precisely, Setzer did--but I knew the moment he'd started the airship. It began with a low hum, almost imperceptible; then slowly, it grew louder and louder, and the _Falcon_ began to vibrate in harmony. I grit my teeth as I felt my headache begin to resurge--and then the ship lurched upward, knocking me off balance and down to the deck. 

"Shadow, are you all right?" 

I looked up. Everyone else had stayed on their feet...and everyone was looking at me. 

I shook my head, and slowly pushed myself to my feet as the vibrations settled in. "I'm--" 

Then I felt it. 

It was as if the bottom had dropped out beneath me. I _knew_ I wasn't moving, I could feel my feet on the deck--but the rest of my body was insisting that I was in freefall. 

My buttocks clenched on instinct. I felt weightless; I felt lightheaded; I felt my pelvis try to slide away from me, and my stomach--I suddenly recognized the sensation and lunged for the railing. 

I reached it just in time, and disgorged everything I hadn't eaten yesterday onto the fields below while Setzer's mocking laughter washed over me. 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

**_LEAP OF FAITH_**

A Final Fantasy VI Fanfic 

by 

Lunaludus Scribex 

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

**CHAPTER VIII**

"Shadow?" 

I slumped against the railing. The dry heaves had finally subsided; now, if only I could convince my body that it could move without... 

"Shadow, are you all r--" 

I turned my head and _looked_ at Terra--then clenched my jaw, as the movement caused my stomach to do a cartwheel. 

She stiffened. "Sorry to have bothered you," she said, then turned and walked away. 

I looked after her for a moment, then turned back to look over the railing. 

It was a clear sky today, with a cool breeze blowing over the deck. As long as I didn't move, my body seemed content to leave me in peace, and with the _Falcon_'s engines in my ears, I couldn't hear anything else--it was as if I was all alone. 

I liked that. 

I didn't realize Relm had come up behind me until she hit me over the head. 

"OW!" I glared over at her. "What was that for?!" 

Relm glared back. "_That_ was for Terra, you misbegotten, insensitive, shiteating--" 

A blast of the _Falcon_'s engines drowned out her voice. Her mouth kept moving, though, and from what little I could read of her lips, it was probably just as well I couldn't hear her. 

"--son of a bitch!" 

I turned to face her fully and stared at her. She scowled--then her leg flashed forward, and my world exploded in pain. 

"And _that_ was for the rest of us!" 

I doubled over and crumpled to the deck. 

"GET UP!" 

I crawled to my knees, and looked up at her. "What did I ever do to you?" I croaked. 

"Want a list, asshole?" 

"It would help!" 

She gave me a withering look. "As if you _deserve_ any help, after the crap you pulled yesterday." 

"_What?_" 

She glared at me in disbelief as I struggled back to my feet, then heaved an exasperated sigh. "Okay, fine. Let's start with you going after Gramps' leg. _Twice!_ He already had a limp _before_ you sicced Interceptor on him!" 

"Oh, for--why does everyone think _I_ ordered Interceptor to do that?" 

"I don't know. Maybe because he's never bit Gramps while _I'm_ with him?" 

I sighed. "Tell you what--I'll stop going after his leg when he stops going after my throat. Deal?" 

Relm ignored me. "Then, there's the little matter of you putting a knife to Setzer's throat." 

My eyes widened. I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. 

"Oh, don't act so surprised. He told us all about how you couldn't handle him getting friendly with Locke's new fuck buddy and threatened to kill him." 

I finally got my voice back. "That's..." 

"Yes?" 

"That's the biggest load of shit I've ever heard!" 

Relm snorted. "It's Setzer. Of _course_ it's full of shit!" Her eyes narrowed. "But it's Setzer, and he always covers his bases. No matter how much crap he's shoveling, he's shoveling it onto the basic truth--and that's you, him, and the Striker." 

I felt my temper begin to rise. "And him trying to--" 

"_Who gives a flying fuck what he did?!_" Relm slammed her fist down on the rail. "You don't pull a knife on an ally! Ever!" 

"Ally? _Him?_" I laughed scornfully. "What's your idea of an ally, anyway?" 

Relm's face darkened. She stepped back, and closed her eyes. "I swear, I'd pitch you off this ship right now if you weren't my..." She looked up and shook her head. 

"Your what?" 

"What do _you_ care? I'm just some little girl you fought with for a year. You know--an _ally_." 

My eyes narrowed, and my voice flattened. "An ally who turned her back on me at a restaurant yesterday." 

"Oh, yes," she said calmly. Too calmly. "Thank you for reminding me." 

I really should have seen it coming. 

She stepped forward and kicked me in the groin _again_--then, when I doubled over, kicked me in the face, sending me crashing back against the railing. As the spots cleared from my eyes, I found myself nose-to-nose with Relm, purple with rage. "_That,_" she spat, "was for that hateful pile of bullshit you tried to push over on Terra last night!" 

Frantic barking filled my ears, and I realized that Interceptor was trying to get in between us. 

"Interceptor, SIT THE FUCK _DOWN!_" 

Interceptor sat. 

Relm turned back to me. "Let me explain the facts of life, since you're apparently TOO FUCKING STUPID TO KNOW WHAT COLOR THE SKY IS!" 

I looked at her, wide-eyed, then glanced over at Interceptor. The dog was doing the same thing. 

"Ahem: Ug." 

I blinked. "Ug?" 

"Yeah, Ug. You might recall him--about two heads taller than you, and just as wide? Rock body with a brain to match?" She looked gave me a close look, then sighed. "Was holding a knife to your throat yesterday?" 

"Oh. Him." 

"Well, how about that? He _can_ be taught!" She laughed derisively. "All right, now assuming you pulled your head out of your ass long enough to notice--were any of us armed, besides you?" 

I frowned. _Didn't Terra have a sword--no, not yesterday._ Celes hadn't been armed either. Nor was Locke. 

I shook my head, and Relm's eyes narrowed. "So, genius, why don't you tell me--WHAT THE BLOODY FUCK WERE WE SUPPOSED TO DO TO GET PAST UG TO YOU? _BLOW HIM?_" 

I gaped at her. 

"_WELL?_" 

"He...he wasn't letting you out?" 

"You're only NOW figuring that out?" Relm let out an inarticulate scream. "NO, he wasn't letting us out! He wouldn't move until that walking prune told him to--and she wouldn't tell him to until she saw you walk away!" 

I felt my stomach drop. "I--I didn't--" 

"Relm! Get away from him!" 

We looked over, and Relm groaned. Strago was storming towards us with murder in his eyes. 

"Of all the lousy fucking--" Relm cut herself off and glared at me. "Look, just apologize to Terra the next time you see her, or I'll kick your ass so hard, you'll be breathing leather for your next three lives! Got it?" 

"**RELM!**" 

"I'm going, I'm going! Sheesh--don't shit an artery!" She walked past Strago, taking care to stamp on his foot as she did so; after a moment, Interceptor got up and trotted after her. 

Strago glared down at his foot for a moment, then limped over to me. 

"I don't suppose it would help to say none of that was my idea." 

"Stay away from her." Strago's voice was low, even, and all the more menacing for it. "I don't care if you have to jump overboard to do it, you stay away from her." 

"Look, if this is about me being an assassin, I would never--" 

"Assassin? Hah!" 

I blinked. "Isn't that why everyone's had so much trouble with me? Because I'm..." 

He spat. "Let them think whatever they want of Shadow the assassin. To me, you will always be Clyde, the unspeakable bastard." 

He glared at me a moment longer, then turned and limped away. 

"Clyde...?" 

I was still pondering the name when my stomach took the liberty of reminding me just who was in charge here.

* * *

"How goes it?" 

I turned my head and gave Locke a flat look. 

He chuckled. "Sorry. It's an unexpected role reversal, that's all." 

I blinked. "What do you--" 

_-flicker-_

_"Not a word of this to anyone else, o shrouded one."_

_-flicker-_

"--That's right, you get seasick." 

"You remembered?" 

"It came to me just now." I looked him over. His color was fine, as was his balance. "You don't get airsick?" 

He shook his head. "Doesn't look like it. Can't say why that is, but..." He paused. "I don't recall you ever being sick on the _Blackjack_ or _Falcon_ before--or on a boat, for that matter. Were you just faking it, or...?" 

_-flicker-_

"I can't say for sure about the airships, but I don't get seasick." 

Locke frowned. "You're remembering a lot, all of a sudden." 

"Bits and pieces seem to be coming back to me since I woke up yesterday." I made a face. "I just wish they'd give me some advance warning once in a while." 

He laughed. "Yes, I can see where that would be--hey, what happened to your face?" 

"My face?" I touched my nose, and grimaced. "Relm." 

Locke winced. "Ah." 

"She does this often?" 

"Physically attack people? No. But you're a sore subject for her as it is, and when you throw in what you said to Terra last night..." 

Now it was my turn to wince. "Yeah, I need to apologize to her for that." 

"For what it's worth, I'm sorry I brought everyone there. If I'd had any idea granny knew you--" 

I waved him off. "You couldn't have known." Then, what he'd said earlier caught my attention. "Why am I such a sore subject for Relm?" 

"That's..." He trailed off uneasily. 

I frowned. "Locke..." 

"I'm sorry, but it isn't my secret to tell." He shook his head. "_Relm's_ not supposed to know it either, but..." 

"Strago, then." 

He nodded. 

"Terrific." 

"I don't think you realized about Relm before you lost your memory, either. If it makes you feel any better." 

"Not particularly." 

He gave me a wry grin. "Didn't think it would." 

I sighed. Back to--wait, didn't Strago call me... "Does the name 'Clyde' mean anything to you?" 

Locke nodded. "From what Strago told us, you went by that name when you lived in Thamasa. Whether it was your real name..." He shrugged. 

"I see. Did he tell you why he hates me so much?" 

"He thinks you killed his goddaughter." 

"When I was living there?" 

He nodded. 

I rested my forehead on the railing and groaned. "An assassin with a mask, a murderer without it. Wonderful." 

"I have my doubts about the matter. Strago's story doesn't--" 

I looked over. "Do you really believe that will make a difference?" 

He opened his mouth, then closed it again and shook his head. "No. Not really." 

I turned back to the railing. 

"How are you holding up, anyway? Now that you know about your past, I mean." 

"It's tough to say, really. I know about it up here"--I pointed to my head--"but here?" I tapped my chest, then shook my head. "I don't think it's fully sunk in yet. It probably won't, until I get more of my memories back." 

"How do you mean?" 

"How does it feel to kill someone in cold blood? To deliberately snuff out someone's life, to--" I stopped when I saw the look he was giving me, and sighed. "The only person I can remember killing is that man who tried to kill me in Albrook, and I did that before I really knew what was happening." 

I sighed again. "You can tell me I was an assassin, and I can worry about having been an assassin, but I don't _feel_ like an assassin. I'm not looking forward to that." I paused. "Does that make any sense?" 

Locke frowned. "That makes a little too much sense, actually. God knows, Terra never..." He shook his head. "You're worried?" 

I nodded. "About that, and beyond that--how many places are there like Thamasa or that restaurant? I don't know I'm walking into a death trap until it's too late, and then..." 

"I wish I knew what to tell you, my friend." He glanced out at the horizon for a moment, then looked back at me. "But we'll be here to help you, whatever you do." 

"I appreciate that." 

Locke clapped me on the shoulder. "No matter what happens, Shadow--you're one of us, and you always will be. Nothing will change that. Ever." 

He tightened his grip for a moment, then turned and left me to my stomach.

* * *

"Shadow?" 

I looked up at Celes' greeting. "Yes?" 

"Are you hungry? Terra threw together a little..." She trailed off as my stomach squealed unhappily at the thought of food. "I guess not." 

I chuckled a little, then glanced down. We were approaching another city--a large one, this time, with buildings stretched out in both directions as far as I could see. "What city is that?" 

She looked over the railing. "That's Nikeah. It's the world's largest port." 

I blinked. "That's...that's a _port?_ Where's the water?!" 

She chuckled. "That's at the north end of the city. We won't see it for a little while, yet." 

I whistled. "And I thought Albrook was big." 

"Albrook rivaled Nikeah once, but after..." Her face darkened. 

"After what?" 

"Let's just say its location failed it." She paused, started to say something more, then shook her head. 

I looked back down at Nikeah. "I wonder if they know about me down there..." 

"I wouldn't doubt it." 

"How do you mean?" 

"I mean you built up a reputation, Shadow, and it was a damn impressive one. Hell, even _we_ knew about you, and--" She cut off suddenly. Her face turned green, and she leaned over the rail just in time. 

Setzer called over from the wheel. "Don't strain yourself, Celes!" She flipped him off without looking back, and he laughed. 

"Are you all right?" 

Celes shook her head. "I will be once this damned medicine kicks in. Don't worry about it." 

I nodded, and for a few minutes, we stood by the railing in silence. 

"...What did you mean, 'we' knew about me?" 

Celes started, then grimaced. "I keep forgetting you don't know anything. It's not an insult," she added, holding up one hand, "just reality." She paused, then looked out over the horizon. "Before Kefka got his hands on those damned statues, Terra and Locke were part of an organization called the Returners." 

"The Returners?" 

"An underground resistance movement opposed to the Empire of Vector." She glanced over at me. "The Empire doesn't exist anymore, if you were going to ask." 

I closed my mouth again. 

She chuckled, then grew somber. "I say 'we' because, until very late in that conflict, I was one of the Empire's generals." She frowned. "I can't speak for the Returners, but the Empire always made sure we knew where you were when we made our battle plans." 

My eyes widened. "I was _that_--" 

Celes nodded. 

"I mean, I'm just one man! I made that much of a difference to an _army?_ What kind of reputation did I have, anyway?!" 

Celes turned away again, and took a deep breath. "Anyone could garrote someone, or stab them in the back," she said quietly. "_Not_ just anyone could do that and get away cleanly, though. And you--half the time, they never even knew you were there." 

I watched her in silence. Something about Celes' voice had changed. 

"And you were _good_ at it," she continued, almost dreamily. "Leo--he was another of the Empire's generals--he would hire you to assassinate an enemy general, and I don't think you failed him once. 

"I once hired you to go after an elite enemy unit--forty of Maranda's finest cavalry. I thought you'd take out a third of them, maybe half--but you killed them all. Every single last one of them, in less than half an hour! No one else even came _close_ to that until Kefka and Gestahl unveiled--" She cut herself off and frowned. 

"Celes?" 

"Never mind." She shook her head, back to her usual, brusque self. "But what really set you apart was your...your _honor,_ I guess you'd call it." 

I blinked. "Honor? In an _assassin?_" 

"I know, it sounds strange, but it's true. You would do anything, for anyone, for enough gold--but once you accepted a job, you saw it through to the end. You couldn't be bought off, you never asked for more money--you were absolutely dependable. You never betrayed a client. _Never._ Do you have any idea how valuable that made you?" 

I gripped the rail. I felt very lightheaded, all of a sudden. "I'm getting an idea." 

"There were battles where I hired you just to sit out, so that the other side couldn't use you. Money well spent, in my opinion." 

"..." 

"What kind of a reputation did--_do_ you have, Shadow? You were the ideal mercenary. The best ally a soldier could ask for--and the worst enemy." 

"And a civilian's worst nightmare." 

She hesitated, then nodded. "Pretty much." 

I rested my forehead on the railing and groaned. 

"...What do you know of Maranda?" 

I looked over at her. "You just told me you hired me once to attack some of their cavalry. Beyond that..." I shrugged. 

Celes regarded me for a moment, then turned back to the railing. As she did, I noticed the ocean had come into sight below. 

"Before Vector turned conquistador, there were three other city-states on the continent with us: Tzen, Albrook, and Maranda. We conquered Tzen before I was born, and just after I became a general, Leo conquered Albrook." 

"Which left Maranda." 

She nodded. "And they saw the writing on the wall. While Leo was consolidating our claims over Albrook, Maranda mustered its entire force and sent it straight at Vector." She growled softly. "Straight at _me._" 

"How did you stop them?" The words were out of my mouth before I realized I was saying them--but once they were out, they didn't surprise me at all. It seemed so natural--how could this woman _not_ have won? 

Celes blinked, then chuckled. "Not easily, I'll tell you that. I lost over half my command, my entire heavily cavalry, three-fourths of--" She shook her head. "And that's not even counting the civilian casualties. It was a close thing." Her face darkened. "A _very_ close thing. 

"We did it, though. We repelled the invasion...and then, Emperor Gestahl ordered us to pursue Maranda's retreating army and wipe it out." 

Celes turned away and gripped the rail. "If there's one thing Gestahl _wasn't,_ it was a tactician. The only reason Maranda's assault failed was because of Vector's fortifications--there was no way we could have even held our own on an open field. _Wipe them out?_" She barked a derisive laugh. "But the Emperor ordered--so I had to make it happen, somehow." 

"What did you do?" 

"What I had to." Celes suddenly looked very tired. "I hired every mercenary I could get my hands on--every assassin, every specialist--and sent them ahead to weaken Maranda's strongest remaining units." She looked over. "This is where I hired you, too." 

She turned back to the sky. "I followed with my main force. We whittled away at them from the edges--harassed them every night. By the time they got back to Maranda, their nerves were frayed, and they were completely exhausted." She squeezed the railing, and her knuckles turned white. "That was what I'd been waiting for." 

I said nothing. There was nothing I could say. 

Celes bowed her head. "That night, we raided Maranda. We killed all the guards, and set the barracks and storehouses on fire." She looked up with a face that might as well have been carved from stone. "Maranda's army was burned alive." 

"Celes..." 

"It was the only way I could fulfill my orders." She closed her eyes and shook her head. "Of course, the fires didn't stop there, and we couldn't stick around to put them out. Without the guards to warn the townspeople, most of them didn't realize what was happening until _their_ houses were burning--and by then, it was too late. The whole city was ablaze." 

She sighed heavily. "Maranda was once known as the most beautiful city in the world. In one night, I burned it to the ground. I killed over half its people. Vector formally conquered the city-state within a month--and I became known as the woman who torched Maranda." 

I blinked. 

"It's not something I'm proud of, and it's caused me a lot of problems over the years--especially after I switched sides. The Returners didn't exactly welcome me with open arms at first, and even now, every so often someone will attack me or throw me out, just like what happened to you. Not so much lately--especially after what Kefka did--but there it is." 

I frowned. "Why are you telling me this?" 

"Two reasons. First, you need to understand that your reputation will never entirely go away. As long as you're Shadow, you're going to be dealing with this. And second..." 

She gestured to herself. "Look at me. I'm here. I'm happy. I have Locke--a Returner--and I wouldn't trade him for the world. It's not easy to overcome your past, but it _can_ be done--I'm proof of that. All you need is persistence, and a goal worth striving for." 

She rested her hand on my shoulder. "That's what you need to figure out. Is there something worth it for you?"

* * *

_Something worth striving for..._

I sighed heavily as I stared down at the ocean. Celes was right, but... 

"Shadow?" 

I stiffened, and turned. Terra stood a few feet away from me. 

We stared at each other for a moment in silence-- 

"I'm sorry." "I'm sorry." 

I blinked. 

Terra blinked. 

Silence. 

Then, we began to laugh. 

There was nothing funny, and neither of us were smiling; but I was laughing, and Terra was laughing, and neither of us could stop as long as we had breath. 

Finally, the laughter died down. The tension between us was gone and released, and I took a deep breath before turning back to Terra. "I had no business saying any of that to you. It was..." 

Terra shook her head. "It's all right. God knows you've had enough to deal with as it is--I shouldn't be adding to it." 

There was nothing I could say to that, and I turned back to the horizon. I could see land in the distance. 

"Almost there," Terra said, stepping up to the railing beside me. "That's South Figaro coming up now. From there, it's just across the desert and the mountains to the castle." 

"What's Figaro like?" 

"It's...different." Terra paused. "It's in the middle of a desert, so it lacks some things--they have to import all their food, for one thing, and you wouldn't believe some of the ways they've come up with to get water." 

"It's not by an oasis?" 

She chuckled. "No, that would be too easy. Besides, it's one of the things that keeps Edgar busy--and anything that keeps Edgar busy is a good thing." 

"How so?" 

Terra shifted uneasily. "Well, how can I put this...in a lot of ways, Figaro is a reflection of Edgar. His personality is..._stamped,_ I guess you'd say, on the castle." 

"Stamped?" 

"For one thing, Edgar is an engineer first, and a king second. Figaro has some of the most advanced technology in the world, and it's pretty much all his design. And then..." She trailed off and mumbled something unintelligible. 

"Pardon?" 

She sighed. "And then, there are the women." 

"Women?" 

"The thing about Edgar is, he likes women. Lots of women. A lot." 

I blinked. "You've told me about how he flirts, but--" 

"_Flirting_ doesn't even begin to cover it, but we'll leave that for the moment." She shook her head. "The point is, since he likes women so much, he goes out of his way to make Figaro as attractive a location for them as he can." 

"How so?" 

"Better wages, better quarters, legal privileges..._anything,_" she said acidly, "that Edgar and his Chancellor can dream up to offset a king who'll hit on anyone breathing and female." 

I winced. "That bad?" 

"From the lowliest scullery maid, right on up to the high priestesses themselves--more often than not, at the same time." 

"Wow, that's--" _Wait a sec._ "High priestesses, plural?" 

Terra nodded. "There are two right now, and they're both rather young." She scowled. "Edgar's very happy about that. But when I first met him, there was only one. She was pushing 100--and he went after her, too." 

"Are these the high priestesses just of Figaro, or...?" 

"The whole following--but that's pretty much just Figaro and its immediate surroundings." 

"The religion's different?" I didn't know why that should surprise me, but it did. 

"Very different. Figaro subscribes to...a kind of pantheism, I guess you'd call it." 

"Pantheism?" 

"Kind of. Edgar and Sabin tried to explain it to me once, but..." Terra shook her head. "It may make sense to _them,_ but I can't make heads or tails of it." 

"What do you follow, then?" 

"Me?" Terra blinked. "I don't really follow anything--but I grew up in Vector, so technically, I guess you'd call me a Manite." 

"Manite?" 

She nodded. "Manism teaches that the world was designed and set into motion by God for some purpose that only He knows." She hesitated, then shook her head. "There's a lot more to it than that, but that's about as much as I know of it." 

I raised an eyebrow. 

"Hey, it's hard _not_ to know that much--it's the predominant religion in the world. There are Manites almost everywhere." 

I shook my head. "That's not it--I was wondering why you called yourself a Manite, then." 

"I said I'm _technically_ a Manite." She sighed. "Manism originated in Vector--a long time ago, before there was an Empire. It was the state religion; anyone from Vector is pretty much a Manite by default." 

"So the others are Manites?" 

"Only some. Celes is from Vector, same as me, and Locke used to be a follower--I think he renounced Manism when he began opposing the Empire. The others aren't, though." 

"What are they?" 

"You know about Edgar and Sabin. Mog and Umaro, your guess is as good as mine." 

I started to say that I had no idea who Mog and Umaro were, but stopped when Terra closed her eyes. "Strago and Relm are from Thamasa. They worship the three Goddesses, the source of all magic. Setzer...actually, I'm not sure about Setzer. I don't think I've ever heard him say he believed in anything other than his own luck." 

"I've heard him mention goddesses a couple of times. Could those be Thamasa's Goddesses?" 

Her eyes snapped open. "Thamasa? That would be a surprise. They're not big on converts...or outsiders." 

"...Outsiders like me." 

"Yeah." She gave me a sympathetic look, then went on. "Anyway--Gau's been up in the air." Terra frowned. "Sabin and Cyan have both been trying to get him to follow their faiths, and I really hope that Sabin comes out on top." 

"Why?" 

"Because Cyan comes from Doma--and before Doma was destroyed, its religion was a death cult." 

"A _death cult?_" 

"Doma was infamous for it." Terra scowled. "If it weren't for the way Kefka went about it...there wouldn't have been many tears shed when the Empire conquered them." 

"How did Kefka go about it?" 

"Poison," she spat. "He poisoned their water, and wiped out the entire Doman population--man, woman, and child. Cyan was one of the few to escape." 

I frowned. _Wiped out..._

"What's wrong?" 

"Hm?" I looked up. "Oh, it's nothing. Just, hearing about Doma...I'm not sure what it is I'm feeling. I _know_ I should be feeling something, but..." 

"Strago did say that you'd had some problems with them." 

"As Shadow?" 

Terra shook her head. "This was before you became Shadow, I think." 

_Before I became Shadow..._

_As long as you're Shadow..._

I stiffened. 

"Shadow?" 

My eyes widened. _It just might work..._

"Shadow, what are you thinking?" 

I turned to Terra. "What kind of reputation do I have in Figaro?" 

"In Figaro?" She blinked. "I don't know, really. I first met you in South Figaro. Edgar seemed to be the only one who recognized you, but..." 

_-flicker-_

_"The dog eats strangers."_

_-flicker-_

I shook my head. "But?" 

"Was that because you weren't well-known there...or because no one knew who you were?" 

"I see. It's probably not that people didn't know my na--wait a minute." _How could I have forgotten THAT?_ "I wore a mask then, didn't I?" 

She nodded. "You were always dressed in black, with Interceptor at your side." 

"Dressed in black, wearing a mask, a huge dog with me, and the _King of Figaro_ was the only one who realized who I was?" 

She nodded, and I smiled grimly. It would work! 

"Shadow?" 

"From the sound of it, there isn't anyone like that old woman in Figaro. They didn't recognize me with a mask on, so they won't recognize me without it--which just leaves..." 

Terra's eyes widened. "...your name." 

I looked down at the desert. "I don't know what I want to do about my past, yet. Until I do, though, the fewer people who know who I am, the better." 

She frowned. "You're taking a false name, then?" 

I bit back a chuckle. "Not necessarily a false one." _Like "Shadow" is any more real._ "I had a name before Shadow. Strago called me--Clyde, wasn't it? For now, I'll use that." 

Terra peered closely at me. "You're sure about this?" 

"I'm sure." 

She sighed. "All right. If that's what you want, Shadow..." 

The desert dropped away beneath us, giving way to the mountains. 

I nodded. "Please...call me Clyde." 

And beyond the mountains...Figaro. 

"All right...Clyde." 

_MAIOREM HAC DILECTIONEM NEMO HABET   
UT ANIMAM SUAM QUIS PONAT PRO AMICIS SUIS_


End file.
